#gelanomaster

One of the hardest parts of getting tattooed, for me, was unexpected touch. I can handle it if I’m expecting to be touched, but I tend to flinch pretty badly if I’m not expecting that *exact* touch. Something I’ve done to remedy this is talk to my tattoo artist about it. Now, she lets me know before she does anything what she’ll be doing. 

For instance, often, during tattooing, the artist will need to pause to get more ink. When the needle touches down on skin again, I tend to jump because, while I’m expecting to be touched, I don’t know exactly when or where I’ll be touched. Now, she’ll say something like “I’m going to start again with your shoulder blade. This helps me control my reaction better. 

Another thing that helps, for me, is having someone with me to talk to. Sean usually comes with me when I go to get tattoos and he’s generally able to distract me if it starts to get too much. 

Also, don’t be afraid to say you need a break! Often, there’s this culture around tattoos that encourages people to ignore when they need a break because there’s this strange competition of who can handle pain better, but, there’s nothing shameful about needing a break. Let yourself take a break to let your senses reset so that it’s easier to handle the rest of the tattoo. 

If you’re getting a larger tattoo, see if you can go in for multiple sessions rather than trying to get it all done in one go. 

Another thing to consider is where to put a tattoo. In my experience, the closer to bone your tattoo is, the more painful it is. For instance, my calf barely hurt, but getting tattooed over my collar bone was incredibly painful. Similarly, when I got my first side piece, it wasn’t too bad. Then, I lost about 50 pounds before getting my other side piece. The second one hurt so much because there was less fat between my skin and my bones. 

I would be honored if you got AutistiCat! If you do, I’d love to see a picture!

Tugging on your earlobe might be a viable substitute because it’s a similar type of motion and might be perceived as just a variation on holding your head.

Followers, any other ideas?

-Liz

I have the same problem anon! I used to pull on my hair to calm down but now I shave my head to 1/8” so that doesn’t work so well.

Typically, I rub my hands over my head (sometimes with a lot of pressure) as a replacement but that’s a bit more odd looking. I just tried the earlobe thing and it felt so good. I think I just found a new stim! (Thanks Liz!)

It could be a few things but it is probably not inherently part of autism, and instead is a comorbidity.

One way to look at this is that when you are asked to do something, you are injecting a social interaction into whatever is you are asked to do. That comes with a lot of social expectations whether or not you are aware of them.

How straight do you stand? Where do you put your hands? Do you look at the sheet that you don’t need? Do you look ahead at the person who asked you to do the thing?

Instead of just focusing on singing, suddenly you have to focus on singing and meeting those expectations. That can be really hard for autistics, and creates a situation where we experience a form of performance anxiety. It isn’t that we can’t do the thing, but we have no clue how to meet the social expectations. This can affect us even if we are not consciously aware of it.

While this is really common in autistics, it is not inherent to autism.It probably has to do with spending a lifetime of doing things not quite right and getting criticized that manifests as comorbid social anxiety disorder.