I guess the real question is, what is normal? For me, I would say absolutely! I don’t know why it wouldn’t be! There is a big part of gay culture about moving fast within relationships, and while that is how some people are, others aren’t. I have been in three relationship that lasted more than 6 months and we never kissed. My straight friend didn’t kiss or tell her boy friend I love you until 9 months in. Move at your own pass and don’t feel like you have to move fast. We may live in a fast society, but we don’t have to give in to that. I hope this helped!!!

Insp

I went through the same thing! I was completely out to all my friends and family, but I always said I was gay! Never lesbian. I think that this is okay! Definitely, don’t look down on yourself for feeling like this. A lot of people go through this. And honestly, if you want to refer to yourself as gay or queer, that’s okay! Hopefully, someday in the future, you will be able to accept yourself as a lesbian. If you keep saying it online, it could help! For me, it took my friends just calling me a lesbian and me hating it at first, but slowly growing to accept it and like it! As you grow as a person, I think it’s easier to accept the word. I hope this helps!

You’re totally right! You don’t have to be out of the closet to be valid! But, it sounds like not being out is hurting you more than being out would. If you aren’t safe, then obviously don’t come out until it is safe and when you are ready. But, friends are the people that should be there no matter what. They aren’t your true friends if they don’t love you for who you are. The only thing I can say is if they are genuinely homophobic, then that will end up being a toxic friendship for you in the long run. If you don’t know what their views are, and you aren’t afraid of them hurting you, then come out to them. It’s so much easier, even having one person to talk to. 

I was that person for a really long time. It’s not worth it. If you ask her out, and she says no, You’ll feel bad for a little while. But if she is really your best friend she won’t let that get in the way of your friendship. It’s scary, but it’s worth it. You will never know how it would go if you never ask. Shoot your shot. Shoot all the shots you want. You won’t get second chances most of the time. 

I could be comphet, so you would have to explain how you’re feeling more to know for sure. BUT! It’s def possible. Romantic attraction and sexual attraction are different for some people, so get to know yourself more and figure it out, but homosexual heteroromantic is 100% possible and is a thing!