Mar 20, 2024
My brain: You have so many tight deadlines. So many things on your weekly schedule. So many important jobs. You have to get important work done!!!
My hands:
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My brain: You have so many tight deadlines. So many things on your weekly schedule. So many important jobs. You have to get important work done!!!
My hands:
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A fresh snowfall and recent meal means the geese are ready to bath and they head off into the deep snow to play.
The fact that geese manage to actually scare so many people is such an interesting example of the predator instinct to avoid a confident animal.
Because we are predators, and Geese are prey animals with hollow bones, no teeth, and no claws. What they do have are wings to make them look bigger and a fuck off attitude. That attitude works on most people apparently.
Just "I'm gonna getcha" and as a species we fall for it almost every time.
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Edit: this post is not telling you to fight or otherwise bother Geese. It's an observation of Geese deterring a perceived threat and how humans instinctively respond to it.
Also, Geese and Swans can't break your arm. But you can break it falling over because of a Goose or Swan.
Edit #2: *big sigh* geese don't have teeth 🦷. They do have "Lamellae", the ridges or serrations in the bill. These help with collecting water plants, and catching aquatic arthropods... But they are very not teeth.
Canada Lugia
beware the vicious aerohonk attack
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What a snazzy little fella! He’s all dressed up and ready for town >:0
Ryland Grace begging for it omg.
He tried to be cool and cocky like “hey baby” he’ll sneak up behind you, wrapping his arms around you.
“Cmon Ry I’m workin”
“I know I know I’m not doing anything…”
You’re at your desk typing away at something, he swoops his head down to see whatever you’re working on, accidentally bonking his head into yours because he’s a clumsy bitch.
He starts kissing your neck and shoulder, you keep protest saying that your working. He try’s so hard to be all cool and nonchalant but you know he’s bricked tf up. He wants to be cocky and smug and all that “manly sexy” stuff but he’s such a sweetheart and he just wants you that he can’t.
All the sudden he’s left the crook of your neck and he’s trying to crawl under your desk, which is sort of hilarious because he’s a big guy, he hits his head on it and tries to play it off.
“Honey what are ya doin” you say.
“Nothing I’m not doing anything!”
You pretend to be unphased, focused on your work but as his hand gently grabs your calf and pulls your legs apart how in the fucking world could you focus. He’s looking up at you, glasses falling off his face, messy hair. He leaned his head on your semi-bare thigh.
“Baby?”
You can barely let out an “mhm?” That isn’t an octave too high.
His hands run along your thighs. “Cmon baby please” he said it so sweetly, “please you can keep working just let me- lemme taste you”
You’re fucked and you know it, if you even peak down at him with his puppy dog eyes you might die. Your hand presses into the back of his head, it’s so soft.
“I-I guess I could take a break”
AND THEN HE EATS LIKE A STARVED MAN.