The Lame Duck Joke I don’t normally memorise jokes but here’s one I know by heart: A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender, “Can I have a duck juice please?” Now, the bartender is an experienced bartender and knows every drink under the sun, but he’s never heard of duck juice before and replies, “We don’t have duck juice.” The duck shrugs and goes away. Moments later, the same duck walks into the same bar and approaches the same bartender. “Can I have a duck juice, please?” the duck asks. The bartender is perplexed and replies, more emphatically this time, “I’m sorry, we don’t have duck juice.” Again, the duck shrugs and goes away. Not long after, the duck walks into the bar again. The bartender sees him coming, crosses his arms and waits for the duck to approach him. As expected, the duck says, “Can I have a duck juice, please?” By now, the bartender has run out of patience. He grabs the duck by his slender throat and says to him sternly, “Look, I don’t know what you’re trying to do but I’m trying to work here and I have no time for your stupid pranks! I’ve told you, We don’t have duck juice, never heard of duck juice, and if you come in here asking for duck juice again, I’m gonna take a saw and hack off your legs!” The duck breaks himself free from the bartender’s grasp, taken aback by his sudden outburst. He apologises profusely and goes away. The bartender goes on with his work and though he half expected the annoying duck to come back again, the duck did not. But. The next day, the duck walks into the bar again. The bartender freezes as he catches sight of the familiar silhouette in the corner of his eyes. The duck approaches him and hops onto the barstool. The bartender tightens his fist as he waits for the duck to speak. Finally, the duck says, “Do you have a saw?” The bartender widens his eyes, surprised. He shakes his head, “No... no we don’t have a saw.” “Good,” says the duck, “Then can I have a duck juice, please?” #duck #barjokes #aduckwalksintoabar #funnyduck #funnyanimals #animaljokes #humor #humour #joke #jokes #jokeoftheday #laughteristhebestmedicine #lamejoke #冷笑話 #笑話 #cartoonist #instacomics #instacomic (at Mcduck Manor) https://www.instagram.com/p/CPS42GDnBwl/?utm_medium=tumblr

A colour version of a Count Duckula illustration I originally drew for a SanDiego Comic Con booklet back around 1997. #countduckula #duckula #cosgrovehall #cartoonduck #funnyduck #funnyanimal #cartooncharacter #drawing #illustration #artistoninstagram #artistofinstagram #artofinstagram #artoninstagram https://www.instagram.com/p/B0MQ96_hkFz/?igshid=1qa7znnawwhuh

I love this video so much I am #Entertained Little Kyle 😂🤣 #funnyduck #Manyourmoomoostation #cows #Farmland #Ca https://www.instagram.com/p/By_AyvjHbjP/?igshid=m09i9vrim7ld

I totally missed the focus point on his eye, but I thought it was funny enough to post anyway!