FIRST:

The easiest way to get rid of the majority of the bullshit that Windows is forcing on us, as of October 2025, is this one-stop-one-click debloat solution from a modern day hero:

It's very easy, even if you're not tech savvy or get scared of pop up windows saying "ARE YOU SURE?" Yes, you are sure, I promise. This program takes maybe two minutes and will save you SO MUCH pain, time, and money (and exploitation).

Now that you've done that, here's the cleanup, to catch the little shit that the debloat might have missed (most of this will already be done by debloat, but hey, it's good to double check).

Even just reading about some of these features makes me angry. Fucking Copilot and "Discover" AI scrapers are in Notepad. NOTEPAD. And then there's this uncanny valley garbage:

No uncanny valley video calls for me, thanks! (Also, what else is it doing while it scans your face and listens to your calls? What else, microsoft? Because there was a lot of memory being assigned to this program for a simple "smooths your skin" add on).

The truly insane number of places they have stuck ads on your own home computer is sickening. Become Unmarketable.

Bonus:

Some background programs you probably don't need that are taking up space and how to remove them (Microsoft forums, 2024)

Your Samsung Galaxy Phone comes with 22 apps you don't need (Android Police, 2025)

Yuuuuuuuuhup. 

...where you just feel like you’re wasting your time? You’re stuck in the past, in your head, while everyone evolves, and new things come out but you’re just not quite as interested in those new things but everyone around you is interested in them so you feel as though you must be in touch with everyone else by getting interested in these new things despite them not interesting you.

Then you feel like you’re wasting your time, and you’re living lies because what interests you is not interesting to everyone else and you’re outdated and you don’t want to be outdated because being outdated in your interests often means being forgotten, and if you’re forgotten no one will remember you, meaning you have no essential reason to care about anything because you’re forgotten and don’t feel what everyone feels.

And I’m not even old, I’m quite young... Isn’t this something more older people feel? Not less-than-20-year-olds? sigh