#for before

YESSS YESS LITERALLY SO MANY FEELINGS

AND IN THE END IM JUST LIKE

I'm going to need to get you a giant thank you gift or hug or something, because the amount of relief that washed over me in that moment made me tear up. The amount of relief is something you probably won't ever know cause if I told you that'd be rather embarrassing haha. Though I still need to tell you a few things (and apologize for the sudden emotions out of nowhere and not telling you in person cause I'm a bit fragile and scared of rejection recently), I am still really thankful you feel that way.

Really.

I wasn't wrong. I should never have doubted after you said "come with me, we'll take you in" when I was at my lowest.  I'll listen to James. I'm going to move past my current pain little by little. I'm going to believe you won't abandon me or ignore me. I'm going to trust you, but this time with no hesitation. Less and less overthinking, worrying and second guessing, until I get it out of my system entirely.

Because I shouldn't be scared anymore.

I'm sorry about just throwing that on you, but thank you for accepting me despite that. Despite that and all the other reasons that exist for you to just leave and not care. 

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you , thank you.