#floridablogging

happy noon to those who celebrate

When you see a white man in rural Florida missing a finger or part of a limb there’s a surprisingly good chance an animal took that shit off him

the city of orlando spent $460,000 this year just to count trees. damn near half a mil for tree inventory. Edward would’ve had it done in minutes, the fuckin bug-counting freak. send him to orlando immediately. next rainy day get his ass in the streets since apparently it’s so important that we count fucking trees. god forbid the pottery studio need to ventilate the kiln room. the city gave them enough money for a big ass box fan. where’s Edward somebody send Edward to the front please my tax dollars are being wasted

Neighbors have officially run out of NYE fireworks and have turned to firearms. That or someone just got shot. Hard to say.

It’s literally December. I should not be able to comfortably go to the springs. People are literally at the beach. What are we doing guys.

So today I saw a man walking down the street with a raccoon in a baby carrier on his chest

WELL, I'M AWAKE. NOW TIME TO PREPARE FOR LEAVING