#flerkens

When people see my cat sitting in the window looking at them, it will throw them off sooooo badly AHAHAHHAHAHAHHAA XD

In this AU, chat noir is actually an alien cat called a flerken (from the marvel comics) that transforms into the human chat noir.

He looks like a normal black cat detransformed, and turns into chat noir. His real name is “adraheon” which means fearsome warrior in an alien language. Which sounds a lot like “Adrien”.

Marinette and alya are hanging out in marinette’s room. Chat noir (aka adraheon currently in his cat form) is currently napping in his cat bed on a shelf.

Alya: so you’ve had this alien cat for a while now. And it turns out it’s chat noir of all people! You gotta give me the deets girl. What’s his story? Has he told you anything about him and his life in space?

Marinette: well no. He actually doesn’t talk.

Alya: seriously?

Marinette: yeah, in the time I’ve known him, he’s never once uttered a word.

Alya: that can’t be right. He’s an alien life form and He literally transforms into a human. Shouldn’t he be able to talk?

Marinette: you’d think. Hmmm… hay plagg! Can adraheon talk?

Plagg comes out of his hiding spot where he was eating his Camembert.

Plagg: well he’s not really a humanoid alien life form. Despite being an alien, He’s literally still an animal. Flerkens don’t have the gift of human speech but they are highly intelligent and can understand you.

Alya: what about his human form? Can he talk as a human?

Plagg: hmm well I guess technically he could. His body changes to fit his needs as a superhero. He gains opposable thumbs so I guess it’s not impossible that his vocal cords changed too.

Alya: awsome! So why don’t we test that out!?

Marinette: now?!

Alya: yes now! Think about it! If he could talk, it would be easier to fight akumatized villains. He could communicate with you during battles!

Marinette: hmmm I guess you’re right.

Marinette goes over to adraheon and nudges him. The little black cat does the cat activation noise and blinks his green eye open to look at her questioningly.

Marinette: hay kitty, can you transform into chat noir for us please?

adraheon furrows his brow at that.

Marinette: we want to see if you are capable of talking.

The little cat turns and flops with his back towards her.

Marinette: PLEASE KITTY?! It would be a great benefit for us in akuma battle if you were able to communicate with me.

adraheon turns his head to look at her, squints and lets out a meow.

Plagg: he said “only if you feed me choquettes”

Marinette: of course (rolls her eyes) deal!

adraheon sits up and looks at her for a good 30 seconds then meows again.

Plagg: he says “well? Where are my pastries?”

Marinette: oh you want them first? ….. your not going to transform until I get them are you?

The little cat meows in response.

Plagg: he says-

Marinette: I got it. I don’t need a translator to figure out what he just said. 😑

Goes to go get adraheon his choquettes. When she comes back, she puts them on the floor and adraheon jumps down to the floor and takes one out of the bag and eats it.

Marinette: are you gonna eat the whole bag first before transforming?

The cat responds by making noming sounds as he eats.

Marinette: ok no. You can have the rest after you transform and try talking. (Takes the bag away)

Adraheon makes a whining meow. Wanting his beloved treats back.

Marinette: come on kitty. Transform first, then you can have more treats.

The cat huffs and transforms into chat noir. He gives her a grumpy look and hold out his hand, demanding a choquette.

Marinette: ok good. Here’s one. You can have more as you try talking.

Hands him a choquette. He takes it and starts eating it, making those same cute noming noises.

Alya: is it wrong that it is so cute that he does that even as a human? 😆

Marinette: ok chat. Say my name. Marinette.

Chat noir looks at her, scrunches his face and attempts to talk.

Chat noir: meerrooow

Marinette: MAR IN ETTE.

chat noir: MER OWN RRHH

Alya: ok clearly he’s struggling here. Maybe he can’t pronounce certain letters?

Marinette: maybe switch up our tactic here. How about saying “T” T. T. T. ( she repeats the T sound for him. Mouthing out the letter.)

Chat narrows his eyes, examining her lips as she speaks, trying to see what she is doing. Then tries to mimic it.

Chat noir: tah… tah.. taheee…. Marr nnn attte.

Marinette: there! You did it! Good job kitty! (Hands him a choquette)

Instead of eating the choquette, chat points to it and then to his mouth while imitating talking.

Marinette: are you saying you want to learn how to say “choquette”?

Chat noir: (nods)

Marinette: ok then watch what I say. Shhooow kets. Shooow kets.

Chat noir: …. Shhhhhhoooooww k-kats. Show kets. choquettes. choquettes!

Alya: all right! He’s catching on! 😁

Chat noir: (holds his hand out) choquettes!

Marinette: …… did you want me to teach you how to say that just so you could ask for choquettes?

Chat noir: (smiles and nods) choquettes! 😁

Marinette rolls her eyes and gives him another choquette.

He eats it and then holds his hand out for another.

Chat noir: choquettes!

Marinette: no you only get one for learning one word. You gotta learn another word for more choquettes.

Chat noir: choquettes! choquettes! choquettes! choquettes! choquettes! choquettes!

Marinette: ok if you don’t stop that, I’m going to give you a bath!

Chat noir: NNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😫

Marinette: ………

Alya: ……… THAT HE CAN SAY?!

Marinette: …. I guess that counts as a new word. Here you go (gives him a choquette)

Later

Chat noir: choquettes! choquettes! choquettes! choquettes! choquettes! choquettes!😄

Marinette: I regret teaching you that word. 😓

In case you’re all wondering, chat noir shouting “nooooooo!” Was inspired by this clip from Steve cash’s talking kitty video.

New official poster for Marvel Studios / The Marvels

“I will keep seven of them.”