#flatulent

Hard pain shooting up my ass.

I gave a push. And now I wish

The pain I felt was only gas.

I should have just endured the pain.

That noise gave me such a start

An Ode(r) to The Month of January.

In closure of this month and in celebration of the end of the longest Government shutdown in history...

Ladies and gentlemen...

The Great, Jeremiah Perez.

But if yours is out of control, try adding artichokes to your diet.  

Researchers found that eating 3 small artichokes a week – or 4 whole artichoke hearts – cuts the risk of intestinal gas by 70%! That’s because artichokes are the only natural source of cynarin – an acid that speeds the breakdown of fats and carbs, so our body absorbs them faster. That means food doesn't hang out in our digestive tract, fermenting and creating gas. Here’s another fact about cynarin. You can’t taste it, but it causes the next bite of whatever you eat to taste just a little sweeter than it otherwise would. It can even make water taste sweet.

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I don’t know why his tummy was so big 😼