#fiy

But it didn’t take long for you to realize that your Shiz classmates are far more prone to gossip than you could ever imagine. So when they witnessed you blowing off The Prince Fiyero when he clearly wanted your attention, your name was suddenly the most well known name in all of Shiz. 

One of your biggest mistakes though, was underestimating the rate at which rumors spread. It was only lunch when the whole of the cafeteria saw the prince left baffled as you pushed past him. Yet by time you reached your final class, you had heard your name spoken by your peers far more than you’ve ever spoken it. 

Even in your quiet classroom, you faced no escape. Not because of the two that sat behind you, making a terrible job at whispering about you while you sat right in front of them. Rather, you faced no escape because Gemma decided that as your roommate she must give all necessary commentary every moment she could. 

“You won’t believe what I heard in Dr. Dillamond’s class today.” 

You kept writing as the girl leaned into your side, making poor attempts to be discreet. “It’s a history course, so I’m assuming history.” 

She snorted out a laugh, nudging her shoulder into yours. “That’s funny, but no. I heard Galinda talking with Pfannee about you!” 

You paused for a moment, your eyes still training itself on your paper before scribbling on. “Galinda gossiping…that’s new.” 

Your sarcasm, as always, rolled right past the girl like nothing at all. 

“She sounded—.” 

“Miss Thorne this is not social hour,” Miss Coddle exclaimed, startling the girl from your space. “Please turn back to your own work.” 

Gemma however, was persistent. It only took about five minutes until you heard the sound of her chair being drug closer to you.

“She sounded jealous to me,” she just barely whispered, pretending to write on her paper. “Galinda, I mean.” 

You hummed, clearly disinterested. “Did she?” 

“I mean, I don’t blame her. I’d be jealous too, given the pair of you—” 

“Excuse me?” 

Any attempts of ignoring the girl had been foiled as you jerked your head up at the girl, bewilderment in your eyes. “Don’t clump me up with him. There’s nothing between us, so the last thing I want is to be associated with the likes of him.” 

For the first time since the beginning of that class period, Gemma was completely silent, but this time you didn’t like it. She didn’t return to her work and she didn’t look up at the board to follow along in class, rather she just stared at you with a small smile slowly reaching either side of her cheeks. 

“You know…now that I think about it, I heard something from someone else who happened to be there.”

You decided you weren’t going to entertain her anymore. You were just going to return to your work. 

“They had said Fiyero practically looked like a kicked puppy when you shoved him.” 

“I didn’t shove him.” Evidently, you weren’t very good at ignoring the girl. 

This time, she let out a hum of amusement, watching you like a hawk. “There was a saying I heard one time…or maybe read.”

Your eyes flicked over to the girl for just a moment. 

“Something along the lines of love and hate being pretty much the same thing…” 

You had to admit, she was good. Despite nearly never talking to her, Gemma knew exactly how to push your buttons; when you looked up at her, any attempt to finish your classwork out the window, she only met you with a knowing smile. 

“I didn’t strike a nerve…did I?” 

You grit your teeth at her, angry enough that you hadn’t even realized that class was dismissed. “This has nothing to do with you, okay? So for Oz sake drop it.” 

With no intention of waiting on the girl, you gathered your things and slung your bag over your back, but not before leaving her one more statement. 

“And for your information, he’s always looked like a kicked puppy.” 

In a school where you felt like you never fit in with the masses, you found the library to be your sanctuary—as cliche as it sounds. 

It was a place that gave no option but to be silent and in silence you thrived. It was just you and your thoughts and occasionally Elphaba Thropp. 

The two of you didn’t talk much, but sometimes the two of you would enjoy the peace that came with existing in a space communally. 

No words were needed to know that no judgement was passed in the space.

You both simply were, with no fear of a Galinda disciple to harp on the girl’s green skin and no pitying attempt to be your friend because they didn’t understand you simply didn’t need any. 

Night approached slowly and the two of you remained unfazed by it all. Some students came and went, but the two of you remained rooted to your own study spots: far enough that you could forget the other was there but close enough that you could likely chat if either of you desired. 

In fact the first time you moved in what felt like hours was to cross the room to retrieve a book. However, in plucking it up from the shelf, you took notice of a rather shoe print vandalizing the cover. 

“Who–what?” 

Your voice was soft, but echoed, taking Elphaba’s attention away from her work. 

“Is something wrong?” 

You turned around, confusion and bewilderment clear on your face as you held up the book for her to see from where you were standing. “Who is walking on books?” 

As her eyes connected to the large dusted footprint covering the very book you held, her expression drooped from her usual neutral-ness to annoyed recognition. 

“You must’ve somehow avoided the chaosification a certain prince started this morning. Left everyone dancing on books and swinging from ceilings.” 

With a swift gesture, she pointed up at the tie left hanging from a part of the revolving bookshelf. 

Your eyes stayed with it before closing them with a tired sigh, mumbling to yourself. “I can’t seem to escape him, can I?” 

“No it seems you can’t.” 

With wide eyes, the two of you whipped around to see the man in question looming in the entrance of the library. 

Your body tensed up, shoulders squaring in and grip tightening around the book as he strolled closer to the pair of you. “Fiyero.” 

But your hostility was met with his own kind eyes looking at you curiously until he came to stand in front of you. “y/n.” 

A tightness spread in your chest, glaring up at him as all negative feelings bubbled up within you. You don’t know how long the two of you stood just like that but…he was the first to look away. 

Only to look up to Elphaba with a curt nod and charming smile. “Elphaba. I was actually hoping to find the two of you here. You see a number of us are going to Ozdust and—” 

“No.” 

Your voice echoed across the room, but unlike before. Any semblance of the softness in your voice faded as you met him with a firm distaste. 

In a blink he looked back to you, once more taken aback with a startled laugh falling from his lips. “You didn’t even let me ask.” 

“It doesn’t matter. My answer is no, Tiglaar.” 

Poor Elphaba stood uncomfortably from her side of the room, eyes shifting between the pair of you. “I’m sorry…do you two know each other?” 

“Yes.” 

“No.” 

Fiyero looked back at you with wide eyes, more and more confused with every sentence that came from you. “No?” 

Nothing in that answer helped Elphaba, the girl reaching for her things between the small yet uncomfortable pauses. “I shouldn’t get in the middle of whatever…this is.” 

“Can I expect to see you at OzDust? Everyone will be there.” 

Some things never change, especially not Fiyero’s desperate need to include everyone in on his mischief. 

But Elphaba only cracked the smallest of smiles. “You have an interesting sense of humor.” And with a pivot she was gone, leaving only the pair of you alone in the starkly quiet library. 

You still gripped the book with fierce hold, knowing that if you let go, there would be the smallest of tremors beneath your fingertips. 

Just him standing there before you with such confused eyes infuriated you. Acting as if he didn’t hurt you. As if he didn’t abandon you.

You couldn’t help but wonder if it was just a sick game to him: entertain the idea of friendship when it was most convenient to him and leave you high and dry once you got attached, all for his own amusement. He wasn’t that cruel…was he?

“I’ve missed you.” 

You faltered. The anger both on your face and within you flickering back and your grip on the book loosened. 

With gentle hands, he grasped the book. Not taking it from you but holding it with you, your fingers brushing against each other. 

“Have you?” 

The nature of the question, you weren’t really sure. You wished it was a snarky reply, one that would send him into silence so that you could quickly make your exit.

But it betrayed you. It was wrapped in vulnerability, questioning if he truly did miss you. 

“I have. From the moment you left…Please don’t tell me you ever doubted that.” 

Your eyes stung and the tightness in your chest only amplified. “I…” 

One of his hands abandoned the book, coming to touch your cheek and for one short fleeting moment, you leaned into it, wanting nothing more than to melt into his touch and forget all the hurt he ever gave you. 

In that short moment, losing yourself in his eyes and touch, the walls around your heart crumbled away. 

But good moments aren’t meant to last forever. You remembered the last time you felt this way. The last time your heart melted for his tricks and charisma. 

You remembered why the walls were built in the first place. 

You turned away from his touch like it burned you and pushed his hand from you. “You’re unbelievable. Truly.” 

It felt as if needles were pricking your throat as you held back tears. You shoved the book to his chest, letting him fumble for it as you backed away and began for your things. 

“Get this through your head Fiyero. We stopped being friends the second I left Winkie Country so whatever ploy you’re trying to play isn’t working. Leave. Me. Alone.” 

You walked in stride towards the door as he called for you. You only stopped when he grasped your hand, but you didn’t dare look him in the eye. 

“I don’t understand.” 

“...don’t bother trying.” 

Gemma was gone when you arrived at your room, likely off to the OzDust Ballroom. You were thankful for it, for she wouldn’t see the tears streaming down your cheeks. 

You don’t remember the last time you’ve cried this hard, but it hurt more than anything. 

It all felt like a cruel joke played on by the universe, waving all your hurt in your face just to get a rise out of you. 

When you reached your bed, you sank down to your knees and reached for something: a simple shoebox. 

In opening it, you found a myriad of objects, but you reached for one: a letter. 

You don’t know why you kept it. But now, you hold it, reading it to remind yourself why you can’t rush back to him, embrace him and let all your grudges fade away. He hurt you once, you couldn’t let him do it again. 

My dearest, Fiyero

I don’t know what to say anymore. You always told me that you'd never forget me like everyone else did. That I matter too much to you. A part of me still believes that’s true. Or at least wants to believe it is true. 

I can’t help but wonder if it was my fault. I apologize if my words chased you away and the things I admitted ruined the bond we had. I wish nothing more in all of Oz than to take my words back. 

I do not know if I’ll even send this. If I do, I fear it will be just like the rest, forgotten and discarded. 

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