Ngl sometimes I feel like only the eldest siblings truly understand Dabi

One time when I was depressed out of my gourd in college I made a 'test' post to a friend to see how they responded to a little of what was going on with me, to gauge if I could open up more to them and boy was that ever a big mistake because the test post got reassurance but the whole damn iceberg sank the titanic, scared them off, how do you respond when things are that bad, anyway, bottom line, friends are not therapists, there are very few people in life you can really unburden yourself to so when you find them treasure them, and God willing, you'll have support along the road to recovery but you still have to make those steps yourself, nobody else can do it for you.

Started staying out way after curfew to see if my mom would notice if I went missing..... she doesn't seem to care or notice.

When you're trying to buy a house so your mom has a home but you feel guilty moving out of your dads house cuz he needs your rent money to help pay the bills. 😔

I fully understand my responsibilities as the first born, but sometimes I can't help feeling that I'm raising my siblings rather than helping them whenever they need help.