#finding grace

But love wasn’t measured by endings. It was every cup of coffee, broken broiler, empty crisp packet and train ride. It was every hangover, stubbed toe, high temperature, nasty splinter and burned tongue. Every morning cuddle and blunt pencil. Every kiss good night, every lost key, sore throat, afternoon nap and sip of tea. Every birthday, hot shower, cold swim, paper cut, chesty cough, mosquito bite and bee sting. Every lost bookmark, orgasm, funeral, traffic jam and bite of cake. Every missed flight, snarky comment, haircut and unmade bed. Every first step, endless holidays, mediocre film, sunrise and poo-bag. Every missed connection, miscarriage and uneventful walk. Every wobbly table, broken heart, treasured photograph and lingering kiss. Every wedding, toothache and waiting room. Every school drop off. Every single day.”

God, why do You love me when I keep forgetting how to love myself? When I bargain with faith and doubt You on the hard days, when my prayers sound more like exhaustion than praise. Why do You stay when I run, when I close my fists around pain and call it protection? You’ve seen the mess. The anger. The nights I questioned whether breathing was enough. Still— You never looked…