#fgrambles

"No, but really. Who are you? And why are you in my room?

• put a dead fly in their calculator (his name was Joey and he needed a proper resting place)

•put their hood over their head and told them to come back when they were ready after they kept messing up their words (in a lighthearted way, they were tired not dyslexic I’m not an asshole)

•played baseball with a ball of tape and a dry erase marker

•put my feet on the bottom of their rolly chair and pushed them around

•indulged them in a “magic trick” and then found a stupid loophole just to mess with them

•twanged a stretchy string with them (physics class)

•did that thing where you press down on a marker lying on a table to make it shoot forward, we had a battle of sorts

•crashed my chair into theirs like bumper cars

We have a few in common (markiplier, drawing) but on the whole I like—love—many things I swore to myself I “hated” or “would never stoop down to” (1D, 5sos, BTS, makeup, popular tv shows, being in a sorority) when really I just didn’t understand them or the societal hatred of teen girls enjoying anything had gotten to me. The me who was a freshman in high school would probably hate the me I am today.

And... actually, I’m okay with that. It shows just how much I’ve grown as a person, learned to be unashamed of what I enjoy, and come into my own. I still have a lot of things about myself I want to work on, but the vast majority of my problems circa 9th grade are no more. I don’t blindly hate things because a lot of girls/women/people in general enjoy them. I don’t actively want to die. I don’t try so desperately hard to be “not like the other girls”. I just...do me. It’s harder some days than others, and I’m still not a very confident person, but it’s something.