#feradach

FERADACH IS NONBINARY

There was already canon confirmation of Feradach being nonbinary or at the very least outside of and rejecting of the gender binary based off the fact that he was revealed to be a shape shifter. Shape shifters historically change between multiple genders and forms which have no genders whatsoever; no matter what physical form they may primarily have, the very nature of a shapeshifter defies gender binary. In short, genders, specifically cisgenders, have no relevance when it comes to shape shifters. In literature, shapeshifters don't have a definitive gender, they only ever have prefered pronouns, prefered gendered terms even, and that's about it. As we all know, pronouns ≠ gender. Gendered terms ≠ gender.

Hence, Feradach’s he/his/him/himself pronouns and occasional “handsome” masculine terms are solely in reference to how he looks, never his gender. In fact, Feradach’s gender is never specified once throughout the entire book. What is specified, however, is the fact that Feradach is simply borrowing the body of a man, a woman, an old man, a little boy, as opposed to specifying a gender. Instead, constantly reiterating that he is a bodiless, faceless entity made up of nothing but seemingly emotions and just barely air, only wearing human faces, but never connecting with or identifying with a specific gender, moreso just learning to love a specific appearance he wears based off of how Merida perceives him beyond said appearance. And I love that.

And I saw myself so much in Feradach learning to love the body he is in, not based on its gender, but based on the fact that it is a body in which he is seen as Feradach the person in; he never wanted to be seen based solely on the gender of the body he wore, he wanted to be seen for who he was INSIDE of the body he wore. And he was finally seen and validated. For who he was inside of the body and out of it, not solely based on appearance and appearance alone. Which made him love himself and the body he wore. He didn't care for the gender of said body, ever, because Feradach, as a just-barely-air entity made up of solely emotions and feelings, never had one to begin with.

In other words, Feradach is my nonbinary king, whether it was intended or not, and I love him dearly.

Bonus, here are a few of my favorite lines explaining that he is in fact a nonbinary, genderless entity merely inhabiting a human body:

“Such thorough details for an illusion. But illusion it was nonetheless, as obviously Aileen had been thoroughly convinced by whatever she saw too.”

“Feradach flinched. Or rather, the body he borrowed flinched.”

“He only looks like this, he only has a body, just for us. So we have something to see. And when there's no mortal to look at him, he's just... a feeling again.”

“But that knowledge didn't feel as immediate as the dying god in his borrowed body.”

“Feradach carefully tugged off one glove. Then the other. They were just ordinary, human-looking hands beneath, as always, but of course they weren't ordinary human hands at all. They weren't even really his. Just borrowed, for a bit.”

Finally, the origins of Feradach, once a genderless entity made of barely air and pure joyous emotions, whom was trapped by the Cailleach and forcefully given a host body to carry out the balance of the world he loves by making him destroy it against his wishes, which prompts Merida to find a way to free him from said curse of being a god wearing the faces of those he's unwillingly brought ruin to:

“There were two hunters pursuing the quarry that raced between the trees. Strange quarry it was, quarry without a body, just feelings, barely more than air, just gleeful odd beings that existed in all times over and over. These breathy entities could see everything, could watch everything, but that was about all they did. They did not harm the world, and the world did not harm them. They loved the world. You can still feel them in the right places.”

“One of the strange, carefree air beings got caught in it as it fled, and before it could make sense of the trap, the Cailleach scooped it out.”

“ ‘You will no longer be air,’ she said. ‘You will be a god.’ ”

“This was the first of the Feradachs.”

“ ‘No,’ he said bitterly, understanding at once what his duty was to be. ‘There must be a way out.’ ”

To Merida, I don't think he'd look like like much of anything. I think he'd be in his happiest, truest form: just barely air. And more than anything, he'd be a feeling. A feeling of familiarity, of comfort, of calmness, of joy. Because he told Merida she'd never see him again, and Feradach always stays true to his word, I don't believe he'd return to her in a physical form.

To everyone else he passes, though, he'd still look like someone different from each person's perspective. That wouldn't change.

But, what would Feradach look like to himself? I believe that after bringing ruin unto Merida in the form of heartbreak, Feradach took on the physical form of Merida, considering he only takes on the physical forms of those he brings ruin to. If he touches his face enough or if someone describes to him what he looks like, he's able to remember the memories of the ruin brought unto whatever physical form he's inhabiting. I feel as if he touches his face often as a means to remember Merida. And that he's afraid to look at his reflection because he knew that staring back at him would be the face of the woman he loved.

However, the Cailleach picks and chooses when to pull tricks on Feradach. Especially when he goes against his duty as the harbringer of ruin and stagnation in order for her to bring about change and life. IF Feradach were to go against his own rule of staying out of Merida’s sight as a means to maintain the balance of nature and humanity and as a means to bring eventual renewal to her, and therefore going against the Cailleach’s rules seeing as how she's the one who bestowed his duty upon him in the first place, and IF he were to try and see her face to face, I feel like Feradach would grow to like wearing Merida’s physical form, because before going to see her it was all he had left of her.

So, I feel like, IF Feradach were to knock on Merida’s door and Merida were to open it, I feel as if she'd be staring right back at herself. Almost like looking into a mirror. Because, Merida doesn't care what physical form he takes, his kindness and his internal air-like soul will always be Feradach. But, I don't feel like that's the reason why Merida would see Feradach as herself. I feel like the Cailleach would play another cruel trick on Feradach seeing as how he went against her rules of balancing the earth. So, only to Merida, Feradach would look like her.

• making Merida a Feradach out of a secondhand Kristoff! Other blond characters (with dolls) didn’t look boyish enough, but I'm still going to do a repaint!

• FINALLY managed to grab a live action TLM Eric for my Ariel (on a mtm body!). Hoping to get a Barbie movie Ken for Eric's body replacement

• Also getting a Honeymaren for Elsa! I'd love to bodyswap her as well (ew Hasbro) but I've never done a swap for the newer Disney dolls and have no idea what Hasbro neck pegs are like. So eventually, but maybe not terribly soon

Unfortunately, no. That knock was a singular knock. Feradach has a certain way of knocking (tap, tap, tap) and it's important to his character. It's a question of whether he is invited inside or not; much like a vampire needing to be invited inside before entering, Feradach does the same except for he could very much just open the door and walk in, but he doesn't because he respects the wishes of and values the safety and well-being of the humans whom live inside. Wheras the knock at the end was a singular knock; a demanding knock, if you will. A knock meant to startle and to question what's out there. Probably one of the Cailleach’s tricks, even. It seems more on parr with her tricks than Feradach returning to Merida.

However, I don't believe he's gone forever. I don't even believe he full-on abandoned her. He told her she'd never see him again, which is true, but not that she wouldn't be able to feel him. And Feradach doesn't lie. He has never lied not once, especially not to Merida. Feradach, being an entity made of just barely air, is a feeling without his physical forms.

I personally believe Feradach visits Merida sometimes when taking the time to let humanity learn and develop on their own without his immediate unwilling ruin, in his true air-like form, both everywhere and nowhere all at once, simply present in Merida’s space. He is a feeling of joy and calmness in his true form, after all. I personally feel as though he's always watching over her. She can't see him, but I like to believe she can feel him, or rather the feeling of comfort and warmth he gives her, hence her calmness in the epilogue despite still learning how to heal from her first heartbreak, which coincidentally is from the same entity whom is always watching over her out of love.

So, to answer your question, I personally don't believe Feradach was at the door. However, I do like to believe he's always watching over her in his truest, happiest form whenever he can without Merida’s knowledge, but she still benefits from the feeling of comfort he's always given her, as she's been able to heal from the ruin she asked him to bestow upon her in order for her to become a better version of herself.