#fantasy firearms

For the most part, it has rudimentary guns, usually muzzle-loading, with a scattering of flint or match locks, but there are also rare mechanical, and magical firing mechanisms. I just throw 'em a modern firearm when I think it's funny.

#long post #hyperfixation #fantasy firearms

ok so this is practically headcanon but there’s no canon so i’m just piecing together what i can from backs of boxes and 2 product catalog listings but here’s what i believe to be the story of galactic man.

id: the original galactic man, a monotone cycloptic robot w/ a bulky chest, a red eye on a hexagon head, and a gun barrel for a left hand. end id.

so let’s start w/ galactic man, he’s a metallic humanoid who can manipulate parts of his body to become weaponry. his three weapon modes are handheld laser gun for assisting in one-on-one battles, vulcan base destroyer to keep evil enemies from conquering the universe, and anti aircraft gun for protecting his outpost on an alien planet.

id: the back of galactic man’s box. the first galactic man logo is at the top and fades down from green to blue. a subtitle describes him as an “electronic space robot slash gun.” then 4 pictures of his 4 modes are shown. clockwise starting w/ top left, they are robot, hand gun, anti aircraft gun, and vulcan base destroyer. 5 bullet points under the pictures that describe the features of the toy. “twist and turn galactic man to create three menacing-looking galactic weapons,” ”anti-aircraft gun protect’s galactic man’s outpost from attacking invaders,” “vulcan base destroyer helps you keep your evil enemies from conquering the universe,” “handheld laser gun lets you battle one-on-one in thrilling space duels,” “exciting rapid-fire and long-beam sound effects with pulsating light for super galactic action.” end id

this product catalog tells us a little more about galactic man. not much but just enough. there’s a mystery as to whether he’s a man or machine implying that he is human sized and shrinks for the handgun mode and that other inhabitants of this universe don’t know either.

id: black and white high contrast print ad for galactic man. only his robot mode can be seen. the text that’s important to this post: “is he a man or machine? twist and turn to create an anti-aircraft gun, vulcan base destroyer or laser gun. exciting sound effects. seven inches tall.” end id.

so w/ all this, we can tell pretty clearly that galactic man is in an outpost on an alien planet and that the aliens who are trying to attack the outpost are called vulcans.

now, i can hear you all asking “what about robocop?” so here’s robocop. he was sold in 2 colour schemes, red and silver and then grey. the back of the box says “team up with galactic man” and basically says this is galactic man, not the robot that we associate w/ the name. this in addition to the lack of any mentions of vulcans and the new logo make me believe this is a completely different galactic man unrelated to the vulcan fighting machine or man. there’s a chance he’s like, the second galactic man or galactic man is a group which explains the pallet swap. this galactic man was supposedly released around 1990, a full 5 years after the original hit radio shack shelves, so it kinda makes sense that they wouldn’t be connected.

id: left: red and silver robocop galactic man holding a golden machine gun. right: grey robocop galactic man holding a yellow laser gun. end id

id: the entire left half is robocop’s face w/ a bright red lit up visor. the top right corner has the second galactic man logo. the flavour text reads as follows: “team up with galactic man to defend the universe! he has three mighty weapons to choose from - laser gun, machine gun and light sword. press on if the eight buttons on his back for exciting sound effects!” end id

i did find two other galactic blank toys sold by radio shack that could be related but idk. gonna talk about them anyway.

the galactic walker is probably a knockoff of tomy’s starriors strazor runabout. the logo for the galactic walker is different from either of the galactic man logos, the box doesn’t mention vulcans by name, and it’s totally out of scale as the gold pilot is about the same size as diaclone pilots at the time. i don’t believe the galactic walker is related to either of the galactic mans but i also don’t know if it was released in 1985 or 1990 so it could have been intended to be part of either galactic man toy “lines.”

id: galactic walker in dynatron mode which can best be described as a white robot sauropod w/ blue limbs and an orange cockpit face. end id.

id: side of galactic walker box. six bullet points describe the toy and are as follows: “conquers the enemy four different ways,” “motor power creatures over the toughest terrains,” “durable plastic body,” “leads the fight against evil space monsters,” “provides hours of fun for children of all ages,” “quickly changes into new shape,” end id.

lastly, the galactic space pistol which has a fourth logo style and doesn’t mention vulcans BUT it was released alongside the original galactic man as seen in the full page the earlier print ad came from as seen below. again, neither the box nor the ad mention vulcans, it’s really just by association.

id: blocky white sci-if pistol. missing battery cover on grip. end id.

id: the full page of radio shack ads. end id.

id: side of the galactic space pistol’s box. three bullet points reading: “defend your territory against the aliens,” “red and green pulsating lights flash in unison with the sound,” “rugged, milder design for hours of action.” end id.

so what have we learned today? that tandy really likes reusing the word galactic and they really don’t care because at the end of the day, mass market toys are just meant to take money out from parents’ wallets. the story, if any, is secondary and any comic, cartoon, or book made to go w/ the toys is purely advertising material and tandy didn’t care enough to actually make a story that could be easily found. but i think i can scrounge a quick summary of what the story might be, feel free to chime in w/ your own interpretations but mine is just a rearrangement of the bullet points on the boxes for reader digestibility.

so, galactic man is a mysterious robot who may be human or may just be a simple machine meant to protect the inhabitants of an outpost on an alien planet from the creatures known as vulcans. galactic man can change shape and size to turn into weaponry for the outposters. an anti-aircraft gun for protection from the vulcans’ aerial assault. a handheld pistol for limited space mono e mono (in the english misinterpretation, not the spanish translation). and lastly, a weapon designed specifically to take down vulcan bases of operation. a pistol is also available for the outposters for protection when galactic man isn’t available.

disadvantages are an increase in recoil and a slower fire rate, the slower fire rate won’t affect ruby all that much and the increased recoil would help with how she uses it. advantages are better accuracy. and softer ejection of casings.