Jan 11
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top 5 targaryen bastards (by a proud targ hater):
5. daemon 2: gay
4. jace: nyra's boy. has a super cool step-sister cousin girlfriend
3. faegon targfyre connington mopatis: I hope he becomes arianne's lapdog
2. bloodraven: actually super chill I trust him with bran completely 🙂↕️
1. jon snow
reading adwd for the first time and the lost lord is one of the most upsetting asoiaf chapters i’ve read so far. joncon’s story is essentially not his story, right. it’s the story of the son of the man he loved, and also, ultimately, a story about hiding. joncon disguises himself, and faegon, lemore and tyrion—all for a greater purpose of getting young griff onto the iron throne. but we also see how he hides things that serve no purpose at all—save keeping him from being utterly alone. joncon’s story as a gay man is hinted subtly (as most queer identities in asoiaf are) but the lost lord does not shy away from how much he loved the men he’s lost (rhaegar and myles) and how much he feels responsible for both their deaths (despite it not really being his fault at all). it’s hard for him to deal with the impotence those tragedies project into him, so he takes control back by blaming himself. he can’t control who he loves, either. that ought to be his fault, too. and now he’s sick with a thing, an evil that’ll take control of his limbs and his lungs and his heart. utter madness as the fate for someone so adamant on affirming their control. that’s brutal. that’s insane.
greyscale as a disease usually reminds me much more of leprosy in terms of symptoms but in the specific context of jon connington’s story, the hiv allegory feels very intentional. how cruel to see griff blame himself for his lovers’ deaths. how monstrous to have him see the skull of a friend hanging from the walls when he knows he doesn’t have much time left. he counts the months and years. he grabs the pieces the men he loved left behind when they fell apart. two years. time enough to cross the sea as myles toyne dreamt. maybe five. time enough to put rhaegar’s son upon the iron throne. some stone men live for ten. yeah, of course jon connington wears gloves. it’s the greyscale, obviously. but also that he’s gay and angry and grieving. because he’s trying to bury every single one of these things down. it’s because of rhaegar and myles and loss and loneliness, too. being surrounded by community and not really belonging to it.
Modern things Id give Asoiaf Characters
Jon snow - fall out boy
Dany - Outlander (complete series)
Tyrion - Reddit
Ned stark - an orthopedic back pillow
Cat - the hallmark Channel
Robb - Xanax
Arya - power rangers (all series and movies)
Bran - a weighted blanket
Sansa - Chappelle Roan (entire discography)
Rickon - idk paw patrol
Jamie - my little pony friendship is magic, he could learn some things
Carsei - cocaine
Genna - a strap on
Tywin- tbh he probably wouldn't want anything
Theon - a vape
Asha - a strap on
Baelon - fox news
Vic - toilet paper
Euron - Salvia
Aeron- therapy
Roderick the reader - the libby app
Barbary Dustin - a strap on
Roose Bolton - syringes
Ramsay Bolton - cigarettes
Walda bolton - booktok
Domeric - star stable online
Lancel - a fuckin break
Robert - condoms, though he won't use them
Stannis - am i gay quiz
Renly - grindr
Davos - ibuprofen
Mel - her star sign
Edric storm - Pokémon
Shireen- warrior cats (complete series)
Mya stone - stone butch blues on cassette
Loras- poppers
Margaery- Pinterest
Myranda royce - Instagram
Little finger - r/incels
Varys - tmz
Faegon - dungeons & dragons
Sandor clegane - top surgery
Gregor clegane - percs
Joffery - bestgore
Myrcella- k pop
Tommen- a tablet preloaded with gifs of cats and nothing else
Meera- a gun
Jojen- anime
Howland - a 500 mg edible
Joncon - prep
Ashara - benadryl
Darkstar - star stamp eyeliner
Ned dayne- yi gi oh
Crastor - to catch a predator
Lyanna- birth control (sorry jon)
Bonus: hotd
Alicent - the lesbian masterdoc
Rheanyra- a strap on
Deamon - viagra
Viserys- an adult wife
Criston Cole- reddit
Aegon ii - percs
Helaena - the most beautiful tarot deck you've ever seen
Aemond- linkin park
Gwayne- grindr
Otto - grindr, but hes there for the meth
Fanon surrounding Dany and Young Griff really like to give Dany a complex about him despite the fact he's kind of got a complex about her. Right now it's Young Griff's who's the one that gets defensive when he's compared to his "aunt". Daenery's accomplishments as a leader very clearly threatens his masculinity. She's the one who survived genuine hardship and anguish. She's the one who's amassed the loyalty of thousands from Dothraki to freedmen. She's the one who did the seemingly impossible and brought back dragons and magic into the world. Young Griff's the one that feels the need to put her down in conversation whenever her value as an ally is brought up.
If he genuinely believed that the Iron Throne would be his then Young Griff wouldn't be so obviously intimidated by Daenerys, but he is. Dany makes Young Griff feel so insecure that he's easily goaded by Tyrion to invade Westeros early. In doing so he's cut himself off from a vital ally in Dany and her dragons in the inevitable event when his impulsiveness gets him near death or killed.
It's just so telling how there's a fixation about Dany possibly feeling rejected by Westeros in favor of YG and resenting him for it to the point of madness and not how he's making irrational decisions when compared to her. It's not even just YG's insecurity and (at best) casual misogyny towards Dany, but his entitlement too. For YG, Dany is only relevant to him in how she serves his ascension. She can be a bridal slave to Khal Drogo or she could his own bride, her opinion on what she has or will endure, the endgame is about YG. Of course, those plans aren't his, they're Varys and Illyrio's plans. But the one time we see him take control, he chooses to explicitly cut out Dany and assume she'll drop everything to go to him once she eventually hears who he claims to be. Dany's supposed to follow him. She's supposed to suit his whims in a way that solely supports the narrative about himself.
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I think one of the major things that prompted me to question Dany vs Young Griff was the fact that Young Griff goes to Westeros without Dany so that they can meet as equals which means he still wants to marry her and needs her cause she adds legitimacy to his claim. Even beyond that, the idea of Daenerys hearing that there’s another Targaryen in the world and instead of being filled with hope that she’s not alone, you think she’s gonna want to kill him for taking her throne, when what Dany values more than anything is a home. You seriously think Dany values a throne more than the chance to have a family again??
the dragon has three heads
"Sansa will marry Jon" "Sansa will marry Faegon" fools. She's going to have an intense homoerotic friendship with Daenerys that will change her fundamentally as a person that she'll never get over.