It pisses me off so bad when people write afab like they're writing for fem reader
"but frey that's the stupidest thing to get mad over"
A lot of writers don't understand the difference between afab and fem and it's so annoying. Afab ≠ fem. When you write "no gendered terms unless 'good girl'" or something of the sort, that is, in fact, a fem reader. Any sort of term such as 'girlfriend', etc. makes the fic fem reader.
Afab can be gender neutral or it can be for a male reader. Infact amab can also be gender neutral or for a female reader.
It's okay to just say fem!reader when you're writing for a fem reader. This space is dominated by fem readers anyways and that's okay.
At the same time, it's okay to write plain old afab reader, whether it be gn or otherwise. It's good to try and open up a fic for transmen/mascs/nonbinary people too. But PLEASE understand that if you include any sort of terms like "good girl" and so forth, that it is now just a fic for fem!readers
I promise you, it's easy to write a fic for just an afab reader loads of praise and what not without calling the reader a girl or a woman in any way.