#every chapter

Dear ao3, i know and I don't care. now if u'll excuse me, im gonna click this button as many times as it takes to feel like the appropriate amount of love i have for this work has been put into it

Obi-Wan is drifting by the buffet tables and contemplating how ill advised it might be to try some of the more exciting fare when he overhears an... uncomfortable conversation.

"I don't understand, Miho, he's had three cups. I poured the sand bat poison in myself!"

Oh dear.

"Are you sure you used the right vials?"

"Yes! It's from the same batch that Aganara used to kill the juvenile krayt for his coming of age trial."

Obi-Wan dithers, wondering if he should try and get involved. It couldn't hurt their mission to let this poor poisoning victim know they've been targeted, surely?

"Miho. Miho he's so pretty. I want his babies."

"That red is something else, I'll give you that. Maybe you should just try and rope him?"

The jedi picks up a small piece of jerky, and attempts to surreptitiously identify who they're talking about. Are they actively watching the target?

"It won't work. Pihn has already tried catching him the old fashioned way, twice, but he just-"

"Just?"

"I don't know. It's like he knows the rope is coming."

"Ooh, exciting. He runs away?"

"No! He just dodges it."

Well. At least the poisoner sounds like they're attempting to catch a husband, and not kill someone.

"What if you throw two ropes? Toss a fake, and then a real attempt where you think he'll move to? You just have to catch it on those horns and you'll be in business. Technically."

…wait, horns?

"The little ones at his temples…" she sighs, dreamily.

Obi-wan has the sudden, horrible revelation of who they're talking about.

"Okay. New plan, multiple ropes. See if we can't trick him."

"I believe in you. Do you think his kids would be born with those patterns?"

He locks in on Maul's signature in the force in record time, and flies in that direction.

The zabrak is on the same section of wall, drink in hand as he inspects the fissure patterns in the ceiling with a mild, almost pleasant expression.

"Maul," the jedi hisses, setting a hand on the man's drink when he goes to take a sip.

Glowing yellow eyes dilated to the moons and back fall from the ceiling on a delay. The wide pupils flex when they land on him, and the man leans forward.

"Kenobi."

<<<Click below to read more about the (dumb) adventures of (extremely) reluctant allies Darth Maul and Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi!>>>