John has blocked me from the IR network while I’m stuck in this three-day meeting marathon because it isn’t a great look when I’ve got half an eye on the live feed and start trying to manage rescues during a marketing dept PowerPoint presentation.
And because they “can manage perfectly well without me hovering and in the unlikely event they need my advice or presence he’ll call direct.”
Apparently I am supposed to feel reassured by this. And not redundant at all…
He’s forgotten the mission reports get forwarded to my work email when they get saved.
So, I’m in the finance team’s year end deep dive extravaganza (or ‘YEDDE’ as the CFO keeps calling it because he thinks it sounds groovy) and am 100% focussed on the detail of the ninth spreadsheet they have sent to my tablet (and not at all on the fact they’ve formatted to 2 decimal places in one column and 3 in another and I cannot for the life of me work out the rationale for this) … I’m being a good CEO and trying not to worry about the family. Because they are grown ups and can handle it without me and whatever.
And just as one of the senior accountants is explaining why 1 + 1 does actually equal 3, an email pops up containing this:
…
…
… what happened???
I have made the executive decision that we all need a comfort break and am now pacing the corridor waiting for SOMEBODY ON THE ISLAND TO ANSWER MY CALL.
Is Gordon hurt again?! He looks dead why does he look dead? Was it the lizards again?! Is he ok??? Where did Virgil get a sword and why has nobody told him how to use it?! Has he hurt his hands? Will he ever play piano again?
JOHN GLENN TRACY ANSWER YOUR COMM RIGHT NOW OR SO HELP ME I’M GOING TO SEE HOW FAR BEYOND TRACY TWO’S TOP OPERATING SPEED I CAN GET HER TO FLY.















