#eph 6

Sometime within the last year or two I had my sister and her boyfriend over to my house.  At that point, I was still trying to have a pretty open mind about him despite every single encounter before.  There was some light-hearted conversation happening and all the sudden things took a turn.  I’m not sure still how it got brought up, but I mentioned something about guarding my heart.  I’m sure there was curiosity as to why I chose not to have multiple tvs, Netflix, internet on my phone, or maybe even why I chose to have blocks on what could be searched on the internet.  I may not remember the exact conversation, but I distinctly remember his response: “What?  Are you afraid of having your mind opened?” Whoa!  It was like I was hearing the snake in the garden whispering from the tree (Genesis 3).  I think I even looked at him shocked before pulling myself together to saying something to the effect of it not being fear-driven; I just am more concerned about my relationship with God and I don’t want the temptation to be pulled away from Him there.  

He scoffed and I turned to my sister and changed the subject.   That moment has stuck with me--obviously--and has been a booster as far as me being proud of my boundaries and implementing even more.  I want to protect my heart, my eyes, my ears.  In grade school we sang a song that said,  “input, output, that is what it’s all about.”  And it’s true.  What we put in, shows by what comes out.  In Proverbs 4:23 it says, “Above all else guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” But I’ve come to realize it isn’t just protecting my eyes from things like sex scenes in movies, inappropriate websites, or crude comedy.  It’s also protecting myself from being too preoccupied to spend time with God; this is a huge battle that a lot of us moms struggle with.  And not stopping there... it’s also about protecting my heart from the attacks of the devil. I wrote the other day about “Emmy Lou” who feels attacked before she gets ready to worship.  The devil is cunning and brings up her past hoping to stop her dead in her tracks from praising the one who forgives; He who convicts, but doesn’t sit there and condemn you over and over and over.  Like her, I can feel the whispers of satan:  “You’re never going to change.”  “You’ll always fail even when you try your best.”  “Your kids are going to grow up resenting you for being a crappy mom.” “You’ll never be good enough.”  “You can lose His love just like you’ve lost your husband’s.”  “You’re replaceable....look at every relationship you’ve ever had; it’s just a matter of time before your kids replace you with a better mom, too.”  “Everyone is judging you.”  "You’re a failure, a fraud.”  “God cannot use you because you’re a hypocrite; all you do is turn people away from Him.”  “You can’t have healthy female relationships.”  “Just give up and settle because you’ll never have a healthy marriage.”  “You need something or someone outside of God.”  “You aren’t equipped.”  “You’ll just make a mess of things and ruin everything yet again.”  “You don’t even know how to love.”  “You’ll never do enough or be enough.”   That’s a lot!  Yeah?!  And those are all things I struggle with on a daily basis.  It’s a fight I engage in every day.  A fight I face with the belt of truth (Eph 6).  I have to tape up reminders all around my house with scripture to combat the lies of the Great Deceiver.  I have to repeat verses over and over and over again to keep the cunning cuts at bay.  It’s a daily battle in my mind.  Here are some of my go to verses that I keep easily accessible on my belt:

Phil 2:13  For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.

Phil 1:6  And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.

Gal 2:20  I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

Rom 8:28-30  And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who i have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.

2 Cor 12:9-10  But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is perfected in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly in my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest on me.  Therefore I take pleasure in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, and difficulties for Christ; for when I might be weak, then I am strong.

2 Tim 1:7  For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power, love, and self-control.

Phil 4:6  Be anxious for nothing, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.