#endymionen

but it’s not like kaoru is out of joe’s life, right? kaoru still comes by with clients, the epitome of japanese perfection save for his pink hair, and kaoru still calls him an oafish gorilla under his breath and gets flustered when joe whispers princess right into his ear, and joe still puts his hand on kaoru’s shoulder and leans in way too close when placing a plate of food in front of him. kaoru still looks at joe like he’s analyzing every atom of him, like joe is something worth studying, and since he never stopped looking at joe like that joe in turn never looked at kaoru like he was something to win and earn and fight for.

joe isn’t stupid. he knows that people call them an old married couple (his own “kids” call them mom and dad, even, despite the fact that reki and langa and hiromi aren’t that much younger than joe and kaoru) because they still act like an old married couple. when joe gives kaoru tea he knows to steep it for the precise amount of seconds at the precise temperature using the precise mug and water amount for maximum flavor and quality, because kaoru is a picky bitch who sniffs about why do anything at all if you’re not going to do it right? but he still allows himself to be a guinea pig for any of joe’s new culinary creations that he haphazardly threw together because what’s the harm in trying something new? they still skate together at s, and their lives are intertwined, and it’s hard not to think about kaoru when kaoru is always there. 

it isn’t hard to slip into old habits though. to forget for a brief period of time that kaoru isn’t his boyfriend anymore, to allow himself to be lulled into a fantasy where kaoru is going to join him in bed after work (because sometimes they still do that, even, when heated whispered insults turn from taunts to foreplay to the clock not moving fast enough for joe to close his restaurant down), because nothing has really changed. 

and that’s the problem. nothing has changed, including the way kaoru will lash out with a sharp tongue at the slightest provocation, unwilling to back down and apologize, and so joe will insult him and provoke him as a fuck you, which in turn has kaoru cutting deeper and joe insulting him more, until they’re shouting and shoving at each other and not in the sexy way but in that hurtful way that leaves joe feeling battered and bruised even if no physical blows were dealt.