#endofafriendship

First off, let me say that every post here, on my blog, has been authentic and is a reflection of the goings-on of my personal life, I share my thoughts on the things that happen to me, so that I might help you if you're going through something similar. 

SO, with that out of the way, let's begin. Today has been a very black day for me. I've had to do something that I don't normally like to do. I ended a friendship today, and not on the best of terms. She was a friend from college, we had a few classes in common, and so we bonded, but after that, we kept growing more and more distant, to the point where we didn't acknowledge each other anymore. 

After a while of that, I felt that I should at least try to make amends, and we restarted communication, but like a shattered mirror, it was not the same, we didn't know each other anymore, then, (and this is where I think I made a mistake), I requested to be her friend on facebook. Yeah, she shot that down a few times, without ever really explaining why, she just went the full nuclear option, and cut off all communication. I dismissed it at the time, and thought she was just going through one of those phases. 

Flash forward to today, I wanted to ask her opinion on something, and when I went to write to her, I was still blocked. I asked a mutual friend if she knew something was up; she said that she didn't know. I took the channel of last resort, (can't block someone on Gmail it turns out.), and I asked her, directly, why she had blocked me. Her response felt half-assed and, quite frankly, was made to shift the blame entirely onto me, without her accepting her lack of communication, that her facebook is for her family, close friends, and those who she deems worthy of being on her list. I called her on it, and said that if she really, truly felt that way, she wouldn't have to worry about it, I would back off and not contact her in the future, so that she could live in peace. Of course, she wrote back to say that she didn't feel any "ill will" towards me, but the fact of the matter remains, that she salted the earth, so to speak, if you read between the lines, you see a pattern of avoidance, of severing communication. She , in my mind, WANTED to end our friendship. 

So I decided to finish burning the bridge, I severed her from my life, completely, she is persona non grata, now and forevermore, until the end of time, in short, she is dead to me. And our mutual friends will suffer, but that's the price to pay. 

Lessons of the Day: 

1. Friendship should work as a two-way street

2. When someone kills the communication, they are worth it.

Safe travels, happy new years;

Here, once more, again feeling bitter hearts, Resentment If only I could make you see Everything you mean to me And I know that things have changed I’ve grown up, You’ve stayed the same Days go by, Minutes pass But I still feel ashamed Gears are turning, Yet things just don’t click The respect we had Is no longer existent I watch you flirt With no fumble or fall I smile, turn away, But inside I was never okay. It’s not about you, So don’t even think, I’m not jealous, Just angry, At everything And the worst part is You’ll never see Because honestly, I’m no longer sure what it is you mean to me If you find the answer, Let me know, But I will always remember To never let myself hope.

Your asking me to change And I can’t believe what I hear I know you found someone to Make you happy But why do they have to interfere You seem to think this change Will be so easily done Like I’ve been desperate for you to tell me who I should become And now I start to cry But you can’t see my face On the phone, you say goodbye, My best friend, my only friend You knew just how to ruin my day.