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this is all youget today

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huge meta post about how i see my ew ships in a nsfw context
this is specifically about my versions of the characters so they all are vaguely on different parts of the aro/ace spectrum. all of their relationships are unlabeled and vague and their feelings towards each other are even more so #just some BULLSHITTT. this whole thing is primarily about extrapolating from their dynamics and thinking about how they would exist and interact in this context lol
note that they just do not have very healthy relationships here
also just kinda throwing it out too (for visualization purposes???) while im not against it i think realistically none of these people are doing anal lol. too much work 😭
having said that
tordmatt
They are surprisingly a good fit in the sense Matt usually doesn't care to reciprocate and wants his partner(s) to just kinda one-sidedly pleasure him, and Tord is rather uncomfortable being touched and having things done to him (which could mean nothing) but is curious about how it's done with a real person. So that's lucky for them. Both don't mind whether it's Matt directing Tord on what to do or if Tord just does his thing as long as it's reasonable.
What doesn't work as much is Matt generally has aesthetic/"romantic" expectations about sex, he wants to feel desired and loved, if he can he does make it a whole ocassion. And Tord has negative charm. He's already rather reserved, so of course in such a vulnerable situation he's lost. His frame of reference being the copious amount of pornography he consumes, his perception is skewed. Thankfully, he is aware enough no one acts like that in real life. So he stares with his big fuckign eyes O_O and cringes internally. He wants it to be as emotionally uncomplicated as possible.
I could see Matt getting frustrated with this, he wants Tord to say something, Tord asks for clarification and just repeats verbatim Matt's example back at him. Hopefully Tord can get a little more comfortable over time though. And Matt could learn to work with that.
eddmatt
Eddmatt I imagine as one-sided on Matt's part. Similar to his usually black-and-white feelings towards Edd, he either fantasizes about (almost fatherly) perfect lover Edd (who Matt even feels like submitting to! scary!) who praises Matt and admits to his own wrongdoings, or he's imagining stepping on Edd's balls and slapping his face or something and pulling him around on a leash and finally feeling in charge.
Both fantasies are completely unrealistic, as he knows. He doesn't act on it.
Although I enjoy the idea that if Edd was having sex with someone else Matt could peek through the door like a weirdo and fume in jealousy. Does he wanna be him or be with him?
If somehow they did end up actually having sex together (i imagine it being more likely in a polyship scenario) it would of course be on Edd's terms.
Edd is not very into Matt and would find him a bit much but hey "not hungry but could eat" attitude. More of just a potentially enjoyable activity to him. And Matt is funny to mess with.
Matt would feel kind of emotionally wounded from this but you take what you can get. Edd is incredibly unsexy in things he does and says. I bet he jokes, makes weird comments or talks about unrelated things like nothing of note is being done. But he's incredibly sexy to these losers because of his confidence and lack of shame.
sidenote while im typing: Tord is more sexually insecure than Matt and Matt is more sexually insecure than Edd. I think Matt tolerates Tord's unsexiness much more because he doesn't feel threatened by him (endeared???), which he can't say about Edd.
eddtom
Tom, despite his traumatic upbringing and complicated feelings about fitting in, generally feels safer around objects and gets quite bold with them. He has an open relationship with Susan and seeks out casual encounters pretty often. You could say he's being indulgent in response to how repressed he was during his time in the sect. With humans, while he tries not to show it, he feels he can't let loose as much. (which could mean nothing).
While in their usual interactions Tom can banter and brawl with Edd, in a sexual context he yields. Already feeling too vulnerable in this scenario, Tom doesn't really feel like he can put up defenses there. Moreover, having escaped a sect Tom found another leader figure in Edd and trusts him way too much for his own good.
Edd feels Tom is fun and easy to be around and they are generally on the same page. So why not? Unfortunately he thinks whatever he does with Tom is within the bounds of their usual shenanigans, not understanding this is a much more delicate territory.
Tom on one hand, gets what he wants and doesn't even need to ask for it. If Edd does something, Tom thinks "oh well I didn't choose to do this im maybe even a little against it so I'm totally fine and can enjoy this guilt-free. YAY!!!", on the other their arrangement is destructive for Tom because he ends up placing responsibility onto Edd and Edd is the guy who sets Tom's hair on fire for laughs. # wound that never heals x rusty knife he twists inside himself
Okay also Tom might be looking for partners who remind him of Edd (canon???????)
eddtommatt
hypothetical polyship situation where Edd decides to include Matt in whatever they have with Tom for funsies. They fill somewhat different niches for him. He even thinks he's being generous here sharing his attention and stuff.
Tom feels a little hurt that Edd wants this to be a Matt thing too (doesn't trust him!), Matt is jealous of their already established "relationship" and that he's an afterthought (but is happy to be included). Perhaps... what neither of them expect is that this ends up helping them understand each other more. AND TURN ON EDD AND BEAT HIS ASS-
I don't enjoy them as a ship but I feel Edd would like a scenario where he plays on the tension between them and makes Tom and Matt make out or something while he watches. *from the director's chair* IM NOT SEEING THE PASSION!!!!!!
has a anyone considered alt perhaps even goth matt... i will be thinking abt him forever
This happens every time smh
This could be seen as romantic or platonic tbh, pick as ye desire.
I stayed up till 5am on this haha..ha
more evil tom -> edd <- matt polyship (suggestive)

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I know you're a Tomtord enjoyer but can you spare the people an Edd or a Matt 🥺
why yes of course i can here take my poo doodle i made wiht my bum
thats all i have for now somehow but i am trying to draw them more so maybe more in future 👀
Got hit with the beam that makes you ship eddmatt :/
eddsworld art dump
was thinking about how vampire Matt cant see his reflection, he'd probably get Edd to draw portraits for him
eddtom meme thing
started drawing Matt with eyeliner, so of course he needs to do everyone else's