21. Trails
I hated to waste any part of the night in sleep, but that was inevitable. The sun was bright outside the window-wall when I woke, with small clouds scuttling too quickly across the sky. The wind rocked the treetops till the whole forest looked as if it was going to shake apart.
He kissed me gently, then left me alone to get dressed, and I appreciated the chance to sleep. Somehow, my entire night had gone completely differently than I had ever imagined it would. Somehow, though I wasnât upset. Maybe just surprised. Iâd given back the beautiful ring as soon as I had woken upâafraid Iâd lose it with my luck. Though it was no longer on my finger, my hand still felt heavier, like it was still there.
I had considered Edwardâs compromise; a quiet, private affairâa road trip to Vegas. Jeans and a t-shirt, a short ceremony; no more than fifteen minutes. Nothing scary about that.
And then, when it was over, weâd be linked in every human way possible. Another human experience checked off the list. That wasnât so bad, at all. In fact, it was a pretty great deal.
He said I didnât have to tell anyone, though I was still deciding if I wanted to keep it a secret or not. Of course, it was very stupid of me to not think of Alice.
The Cullens got home around noon. There was a new, businesslike feel to the atmosphere around them, and it pulled me back into the enormity of what was coming.
Alice seemed to be in an unusually bad mood. I chalked it up to her frustration with feeling normal, because her first words to Edward were a complaint about working with the wolves.
âI thinkââshe made a face as she used the uncertain wordââthat youâre going to want to pack for cold weather, Edward. I canât see where you are exactly, because youâre taking off with that dog this afternoon. But the storm thatâs coming seems particularly bad in that general area.â
Edward nodded.
âItâs going to snow on the mountains,â she warned him.
âSnow?â I muttered, âItâs June for crying out loud.â
âWear a jacket,â Alice told me. Her voice was unfriendly, and that surprised me. I tried to read her face, but she turned away.
I looked at Edward, and he was smiling; whatever was bugging Alice amused him.
Edward had more than enough camping gear to choose fromâprops in the human charade; the Cullens were good customers at the Newtonâs store. He grabbed a down sleeping bag, a small tent, and several packets of dehydrated foodâgrinning when I made a face at themâand stuffed them all in a backpack.
Alice wandered into the garage while we were there, watching Edwardâs preparations without a word. He ignored her.
When he was done packing, Edward turned to me. âWhy donât you call Jacob and tell him weâll be ready for him in an hour or so. He knows where to meet us.â
Jacob wasnât home, but Billy promised to call around until he could find an available werewolf to pass the news to.
âDonât you worry about Charlie, Beau,â Billy said. âIâve got my part of this under control.â
âThanks, Billy. I know Charlie will be fine.â I didnât feel so confident about his sonâs safety, but I didnât add that.
âI wish I could be with the rest of them tomorrow.â Billy chuckled regretfully. âBeing an old man is a hardship, Beau.â
I couldnât even begin to comprehend why every single person in my life seemed to jump at the chance to fight.
âHave fun with Charlie.â
âGood luck, Beau,â he answered. âAnd⊠pass that along to the, er, Cullens for me.â
âI will,â I promised, surprised by the gesture.
I pocketed my phone, and turned back to Edward and Alice. I saw that they were having some kind of silent discussion. She was staring at him, pleading in her eyes. He was frowning back, unhappy with whatever she wanted.
âBilly said to tell you âgood luck.ââ
âThat was generous of him,â Edward said, breaking away from her.
âBeau, could I please speak to you alone?â Alice asked swiftly.
âYouâre about to make my life much harder than it needs to be, Alice,â Edward warned her through his teeth. âIâd really rather you didnât.â
âThis isnât about you, Edward,â she shot back.
He laughed. Something about her response was funny to him.
âItâs not,â Alice insisted. âThis is between Beau and myself.â
He frowned.
âItâs fine, Edward, let her talk to me,â I told him. I was curious.
âYou asked for it,â he muttered. He laughed againâhalf angry, half amusedâand strode out of the garage.
I turned to Alice, worried now, but she didnât look at me. Her bad mood hadnât passed yet.
She went to sit on the hood of her Porsche, her face dejected. I followed, and leaned against the bumper beside her.
âBeau?â Alice asked in a sad voice, shifting over and curling up against my side. Her voice sounded so miserable that I wrapped my arms around her shoulders in comfort.
âWhatâs wrong, Alice?â
âDonât you love me?â she asked in that same sad tone.
âOf course I do. You know that.â
âThen why do I see you sneaking off to Vegas to get married without inviting me?â
âOh,â I muttered, my cheeks turning pink. I could see that I had seriously hurt her feelings, and I hurried to defend myself. âYou know I donât like making a big deal out of things. It was Edwardâs idea, anyway.â
âIt doesnât matter whose idea it was, Beau! Itâs the principle of the matter! I expect that kind of thing from Edward, but not from you. I love you like you were my own brother.â
âAnd I love you like a sister, Alice!â
âWords!â She sighed.
âAlice, of course youâre invited. There wonât be much to see, though.â
She was still grimacing.
âWhat?â I pushed.
âHow much do you love me, Beau?â
âWhy?â
She stared at me with pleading eyes, her long black eyebrows slanting up in the middle and pulling together, her lips trembling at the corners. It was a heart-breaking expression.
âPlease, please, please,â she whispered. âPlease, Beau, please⊠Please let me plan your wedding.â
âAw, Alice!â I sighed, pulling away and standing up. âCome on, donât do this right now. Weâre about to face an army of homicidal newborns and youâre upset about a wedding?â
âI know, Beau, I know, but it would mean so much to me!â
I folded my arms across my chest. âAlice, this is unfair.â
âIâll bet Edward would like it better if you did this traditionally, though heâd never tell you that. And Esmeâthink what it would mean to her!â
I groaned. âI canât believe weâre having this conversation right now.â
âIâll owe you for a decade!â
âYouâd owe me for a century!â
Her eyes glowed. âIs that a yes?â
âNo! I donât want to do anything big and crazy!â
âYou wonât have to do  anything but walk a few yards and then repeat after the minister.â
âUgh, Alice.â
âPlease?â She started bouncing in place. âPlease, please, please, please, please?â
I couldnât help but smile a little, but I was fighting it hard. The smile broke through on the corners of my lips as I tried to give her a serious expression. âIâll never, never ever forgive you for this, Alice.â
âYay!â she squealed, clapping her hands together.
âItâs not a complete yes, Alice!â
âBut it will be,â she sang.
âEdward!â I called, walking out of the garage. âI know youâre listening. Get over here.â Alice was right behind me, still clapping.
âThanks so much, Alice,â Edward said acidly, coming from behind me. I turned to voice my frustrations, but his expression was so worried and upset that I held my tongue. I sighed and wrapped my arms around his waist.
âVegas,â Edward promised in my ear.
âNot a chance,â Alice gloated. âBeau would never do that to me. You know, Edward, as a brother, you are sometimes a disappointment.â
âDonât be mean,â I chided her. âJust because youâre getting your way.â
âI saw your smile, Beau! Deep down you like the idea! Youâre just nervous about it, and I understand why!â she was practically dancing. âWeâll talk about every single detail and I promise youâll be the happiest groom in the world!â
I laughed. âAlright, Alice. I never thought Iâd see the day where Iâd be willing to take a bet against you, but it has arrived.â
She laughed her silvery laugh. âSo, are you going to show me the ring?â
I jumped as she grabbed my left hand and then dropped it just as quickly.
âHuh. I saw him put it on you⊠Did I miss something?â she asked. She was concentrated for half a second, furrowing her brow, before she answered her own questions. âNo. Weddingâs still on.â
âBeau was nervous about losing it,â Edward explained.
âWhatâs one more diamond? Well, I guess the ring has lots of diamonds, but my point is that heâs already got one onââ
âEnough, Alice!â Edward cut her off suddenly. The way he glared at her⊠he looked like a vampire again. âWeâre in a hurry.â
âI donât understand. Whatâs that about diamonds?â I asked.
âWeâll talk about it later,â Alice said. âEdward is right â youâd better get going. Youâve got to set a trap and make camp before the storm comes.â She frowned, and her expression was anxious, almost nervous. âDonât forget your coat, Beau. It seems . . . unseasonably cold.â
âIâve already got it,â Edward assured her.
âHave a nice night,â she told us in farewell.
It was twice as far to the clearing as usual; Edward took a long detour, making sure my scent would be nowhere near the trail Jacob would hide later. He carried me in his arms, the bulky backpack in my usual spot.
He stopped at the farthest end of the clearing and set me on my feet.
âAll right. Just walk north for some ways, touching as much as you can. Alice gave me a clear picture of their path, and it wonât take long for us to intersect it.â
âNorth?â
He smiled and pointed out the right direction.
I wandered into the woods, leaving the clear yellow light of the strangely sunny day in the clearing behind me. Maybe Aliceâs blurred sight would be wrong about the snow. I hoped so. The sky was mostly clear, though the wind whipped furiously through the open spaces. In the trees it was calmer, but much too cold for June â even in a long-sleeved shirt with a thick sweater over the top, there were goose bumps on my arms. I walked slowly, trailing my fingers over anything close enough: the rough tree bark, the wet ferns, the moss-covered rocks.
Edward stayed with me, walking a parallel line about twenty yards away. âAm I doing this right?â I called.
âPerfectly.â
I had an idea. âWill this help?â I asked as I ran my fingers through my hair and tugged out a few strands. I dropped them into the ferns.
âYes, that does make the trail stronger. But you donât need to pull your hair out, Beau. It will be fine.â
âIâve got a few extra I can spare.â
It was gloomy under the trees, and I wished I could walk closer to Edward and hold is hand.
I dropped another hair into a broken branch that cut through my path.
âYou donât need to let Alice have her way, you know,â Edward said.
âDonât worry about it, Edward. Iâm not going to leave you at the alter or something.â The more I thought about it, I wasnât feeling totally opposed to Aliceâs idea of a beautiful wedding. Facing it head on, I was starting to think that maybe my opposition to the idea was, well, wrong.
âThatâs not what Iâm worried about. I want this to be what you want it to be.â
I repressed a sigh. âStop worrying, Edward. If Alice makes good on her promise to discuss everything with me, then, I think itâll be fine.â
âWell, even then, we can just keep it small. Just us. Emmett can get a clerical license off the Internet.â
I laughed. âThere we go.â I tried to picture Emmett reading the vows, but it only made me laugh harder.
âSee,â he said with a smile. âThereâs always a compromise.â
It took a while for me to reach the spot where the newborn army would be certain to cross my trail, but Edward never got impatient with my pace.
He had to lead a bit more on the way back, to keep me on the same path. It all looked alike to me.
We were almost to the clearing when I fell. I could see the wide opening ahead, and thatâs probably why I got too eager and forgot to watch my feet. I caught myself before my head bashed into the nearest tree, but a small branch snapped off under my left hand and gouged into my palm.
âOuch! Oh, fabulous,â I muttered.
âAre you all right?â
âIâm fine. Stay where you are. Iâm bleeding. It will stop in a minute.â
He ignored me. He was right there before I could finish.
âIâve got a first aid kid,â he said, pulling off the backpack. âI had a feeling I might need it.â
âItâs not bad. I can take care of itâyou donât have to make yourself uncomfortable.â
âIâm not uncomfortable,â he said calmly. âHereâlet me clean it.â
âWait a second, I just got another idea.â
Without looking at the blood and breathing through my mouth, just in case my stomach might react, I pressed my hand against a rock within my reach.
âWhat are you doing?â
âJasper will love this,â I muttered to myself. I started for the clearing again, pressing my palm against everything in my path. âIâll bet this really gets them going.â
Edward sighed.
âHold your breath,â I told him.
âIâm fine. I just think youâre going overboard.â
âThis is all I get to do. I want to do a good job.â
We broke through the last of the trees as I spoke. I let my injured hand graze across the ferns.
âWell, you have,â Edward assured me. âThe newborns will be frantic, and Jasper will be very impressed with your dedication. Now let me treat your hand â youâve gotten the cut dirty.â
âLet me do it, please.â
He took my hand and smiled as he examined it. âThis doesnât bother me anymore.â
I watched him carefully as he cleaned the gash, looking for some sign of distress. He continued to breathe evenly in and out, the same small smile on his lips.
âWhy not?â I finally asked as he smoothed a bandage across my palm.
He shrugged. âI got over it.â
âYou⊠got over it? When? How?â I tried to remember the last time heâd held his breath around me. All I could think of was my wretched birthday party last September.
Edward pursed his lips, seeming to search for the words. âI lived through an entire twenty-four hours thinking that you were dead, Beau. That changed the way I look at a lot of things.â
âDid it change the way I smell to you?â
âNot at all. But⊠having experienced the way it feels to think Iâve lost you⊠my reactions have changed. My entire being shies away from any course that could inspire that kind of pain again.â
I didnât know what to say to that.
He smiled at my expression. âI guess that you could call it a very educational experience.â
The wind tore through the clearing then, pulling at my hair and making me shiver.
âAll right,â he said, reaching into his pack again. âYouâve done your part.â He pulled out my heavy winter jacket and held it out for me to slide my arms in. âNow itâs out of our hands. Letâs go camping!â
I laughed at the mock enthusiasm in his voice.
He took my bandaged hand and kissed it gently, then my other handâfreshly out of the braceâand started toward the other side of the clearing.
âWhere are we meeting Jacob?â I asked.
âRight here.â He gestured to the trees in front of us just as Jacob stepped warily from their shadows.
It shouldnât have surprised me to see him human. I wasnât sure why Iâd been looking for the big red-brown wolf.
Jacob seemed bigger againâno doubt a product of my expectations; I must have unconsciously been hoping to see the smaller Jacob from my memory, the easygoing friend who hadnât changed everything. He had his arms folded across his bare chest, a jacket clutched in one fist. His face was expressionless as he watched us.
Edwardâs lips pulled down at the corners. âThere had to have been a better way to do this.â
âToo late now,â I shrugged.
He sighed.
âHey, Jake,â I greeted him when we got closer.
âHi, Beau.â
âHello, Jacob,â Edward said.
Jacob nodded once, and was immediately all business. âWhere do I take him?â
Edward pulled a map from a side pocket on the pack and offered it to him. Jacob unfolded it.
âWeâre here now,â Edward said, reaching over to touch the right spot. Jacob recoiled slightly from his hand, and then steadied himself. Edward pretended not to notice.
âAnd youâre taking him up here,â Edward continued, tracing a serpentine pattern around the elevation lines on the paper. âRoughly nine miles.â
Jacob nodded again.
âWhen youâre about a mile away, you should cross my path. That will lead you in. Do you need the map?â
âNo, thanks. I know this area pretty well. I think I know where Iâm going.â
Jacob seemed to be working hard to keep his tone polite.
âIâll take a longer route,â Edward said. âAnd Iâll see you in a few hours.â
Edward stared at me unhappily. He didnât like this part of the plan.
âSee you,â I murmured.
Edward faded into the trees, heading in the opposite direction.
As soon as he was gone, Jacob turned cheerful.
âWhatâs up, Beau?â he asked with a big grin.
I chuckled darkly. âSame old, same old.â
âYeah,â he agreed. âBunch of vampires trying to kill you. The usual.â
âThe usual.â
âWell,â he said as he shrugged into his jacket to free his arms. âLetâs get going.â
I sighed, taking a small step closer to him. âLetâs go.â I agreed.
He bent down and swept his arm behind my knees, knocking them out from under me. His other arm caught me before my head hit the ground.
âJerk,â I muttered.
Jacob chuckled, already running through the trees. He kept a steady pace, a brisk jog that a fit human could keep up with⊠across a level plane⊠if they werenât burdened with a hundred-plus pounds as he was.
âYou donât have to run, Jake. Youâll get tired.â
âRunning doesnât make me tired,â he said. His breathing was evenâlike the fixed tempo of a marathoner. âBesides, it will be colder soon. I hope he gets the camp set up before we get there.â
I tapped my finger against the thick padding of his parka. âI thought you didnât get cold now.â
âI donât. I brought this for you, just in case you werenât prepared.â He looked at my jacket, almost as if he were disappointed that I was.
âOh. Thanks, Jake. That was sweet of you.â
He nodded slightly, distracted. âI donât like the way the weather feels. Itâs making me edgy. Notice we havenât seen any animals?â
âUm, not really.â
âI guess you wouldnât. Your senses arenât as sharp as mine.â
I let that pass. âAlice was worried about the storm, too.â
âIt takes a lot to silence the forest this way. You picked a hell of a night for a camping trip.â
âIt wasnât entirely my idea.â
The pathless way he took began to climb more and more steeply, but it didnât slow him down. He leapt easily from rock to rock, not seeming to need his hands at all. His perfect balance reminded me of a mountain goat.
âWhatâs with the addition to your necklace?â he asked.
I looked down, and saw the crystal heart resting on my chest.
I shrugged guiltily. âAnother graduation present.â
He snorted. âA rock. Figures.â
A rock? I was suddenly reminded of Aliceâs unfinished sentence outside the garage. I stared at the bright white crystal and tried to remember what Alice had been saying before⊠about diamonds. Could she have been trying to say that heâs already got one on you? As in, I was already wearing one diamond from Edward? No, that was impossible. The heart would have to be five carats or something crazy like that! Edward wouldnâtâ
âSo, itâs been a while since you came down to La Push,â Jacob said, interrupting my conjectures.
âIâve been busy,â I told him. âBesides⊠Iâm not sure if I would have visited, anyway.â
He grimaced. âI was hoping you would have forgiven me by now.â
âIt wasnât that long ago.â
He sighed. âBeen thinking about that last time a lot, have you?â
âNot the way you want me to.â
âI really am sorry, Beau. I wish there was a way I could prove that to you.â His voice was low and husky.
I felt slightly uncomfortable having this conversation under the present conditionsâwith his too-warm arms wrapped tightly around me and his face so close to mine.
âDid you at least think about our conversation?â he asked.
âWhat about it?â
âSee if it affects your decision at all, I mean.â
âMy decision is the same, Jake.â I sighed.
âCan I ask you something?â He said after a second.
âWhat?â
âIs he a better kisser than I am?â He asked, suddenly very glum.
âI really couldnât say, Jake. Edward is the only person Iâve ever kissed.â
âBesides me.â
âI think we established that didnât count as a kiss so much as an assault.â
âOuch! Thatâs cold.â
I shrugged. âItâs the truth.â
âIâll be apologizing for the rest of my life, huh?â He asked.
âI forgave you⊠mostly. It doesnât change the way it was.â
He muttered something unintelligible.
It was quiet then for a while; there was just the sound of his measured breathing and the wind roaring high above us in the treetops. A cliff face rose sheer beside us, bare, rough, gray stone. We followed the base as it curved upward out of the forest.
âIâm not trying to sound like a broken record or something, Beau,â Jacob suddenly said, âI just think itâs pretty irresponsible.â
âWhat are you talking about?â
âThink about it, Beau. Like you said, youâve only kissed one personâwho isnât even really personâin your whole life, and youâre calling it quits? How do you know thatâs what you want? Shouldnât you play the field a little?â
I kept my voice cool. âI know what I want.â
âBut it couldnât hurt to double check. Maybe you should try kissing someone elseâjust for comparisonâs sake⊠since what happened the other day doesnât count. You could kiss me, for example. I donât mind if you want to use me to experiment.â
He pulled me tighter against his chest, so that my face was closer to his. He was smiling at his joke, but I wasnât taking any chances.
âBehave yourself, Jake. I wonât stop him if he wants to break your jaw.â
He sighed, but he was still smiling. âOkay, but if you ask me to kiss you, he wonât have any reason to get upset. He said that was fine.â
âDonât hold your breath, Jake.â
âYouâre in a bad mood today.â
âI wonder why?â
âSometimes I think you like me better as wolf.â
âSometimes I do. Maybe itâs because you donât say or do things that upset me so badly.â
He pursed his lips thoughtfully. âNo, I donât think thatâs it. I think itâs easier for you to be near me when Iâm not human, because you donât have to pretend that youâre not attracted to me.â
My mouth fell open with a little popping sound. Something in the back of my headâa thoughtâstarted buzzing. I snapped my mouth shut.
He heard that. His lips pulled tightly across his face in a smile.
I took a slow breath before I spoke. âNo. Iâm pretty sure thatâs not it.â
He sighed. âCome on, babe. Be honest with yourself. You have to know how aware you are of me. Physically, I mean.â
âHow could anyone not be aware of you physically, Jacob?â I demanded. âYouâre an enormous oaf who lacks respect for anyone elseâs personal space.â
âI make you nervous. But only when Iâm human. When Iâm a wolf, youâre more comfortable around me.â
âMaybe Iâm nervous because I never know when youâre going to misbehave when youâre a human.â
He stared down at me for a minute, slowing to a walk, the amusement draining from his face. His eyes narrowed, turned black in the shadow of his brows. His breathing, so regular as he ran, started to accelerate. His eyes searched mine, looking for something. He unconsciously leaned his face closer to mine.
My own breath caught for a moment, but I recovered quickly.
âItâs your face, Jake,â I reminded him.
He blinked a few times, then pulled his face back and started jogging again. âSorry, sorry.â He laughed loudly. âI donât really want to fight with your vampire tonightâI mean, any other night, sure. But we both have a job to do tomorrow, and I wouldnât want to leave the Cullens one short.â
The sudden, unexpected swell of shame distorted my expression.
âI know, I know,â he responded, not understanding. âYou think he could take me.â
I couldnât speak. It was my brilliant idea had left the Cullens one short. What if someone got hurt because of it? What if one the Cullens got hurt? Or one of the wolves? Or Jacob?
âWhatâs the matter, Beau?â The joking bravado vanished from his face, revealing my Jacob underneath, like pulling a mask away. âIf something I said upset you, Iâm sorry. I was only kidding. I didnât mean anythingâhey, are you okay? Donât cry, Beau,â he pled.
I tried to pull myself together. âIâm not going to cry.â
âWhat did I say?â
âItâs nothing you said. Itâs just, well, itâs me. Itâs my own fault. Something I did.â
He stared at me, his eyes wide with confusion.
âEdward isnât going to fight tomorrow,â I whispered the explanation. âHeâs staying with me, instead.â
He frowned. âYou think this isnât going to work? That theyâll find you here? Do you know something I donât know?â
âNo, no. Iâm not afraid of that. I just⊠I was trying to convince him to let me go to the clearing to help distract the newborns and it backfired completely and now heâs staying with meâŠâ I closed my eyes. âThe worst part is, I didnât convince him to not stay with me. I was selfish.â
Jacob was quiet.
I kept whispering, my eyes shut. âIf anyone gets hurt, it will always be my fault. And even if no one does⊠It doesnât change the fact that I was selfish. He wonât hold it against me, but Iâll always feel guilty about it. Especially since I could have asked him to go, and I didnât.â I felt just a tiny bit better, getting this off my chest. Even if I could only confess it to Jacob.
He snorted. My eyes opened slowly, and I was sad to see that the hard mask was back.
âI canât believe he let you talk him out of going. I wouldnât miss this for anything.â
I sighed. âI know.â
âThat doesnât mean anything, though.â He was suddenly backtracking. âThat doesnât mean that he loves you more than I do.â
âBut you wouldnât stay with me, even if I begged.â
He pursed his lips for a moment, and I wondered if he would try to deny it. We both knew the truth. âThatâs only because I know you better,â he said at last. âEverythingâs going to go without a hitch. Even if youâd asked me and Iâd said no, you wouldnât be mad at me afterwards.â
âIf everything does go without a hitch, youâre probably right. I wouldnât be mad. But the whole time youâre gone, Iâll be sick with worry, Jake. Crazy with it.â
âWhy?â he asked gruffly. âWhy does it matter to you if something happens to me?â
âDonât say that. You know how much you mean to me, Jake. Iâm sorry itâs not in the way you want, but thatâs just how it is. Youâre my best friend. At least, you used to be. And still sometimes are⊠when you let your guard down.â
He smiled the old smile that I loved. âIâm always that,â he promised. âEven when I donât⊠behave as well as I should. Underneath, Iâm always in here.â
âI know. Why else would I put up with all of your crap?â
He laughed with me, and then his eyes were sad. âWhen are you going to figure out that youâre in love with me, too?â
âCome on, Jake, donât ruin the moment.â
âIâm not saying you donât love him. Iâm not stupid. But itâs possible to love more than one person at a time, Beau. Iâve seen it in action.â
âIâm not Sam, Jacob.â
He wrinkled his nose, and changed the subject.
âWeâre not far now, I can smell him.â
I sighed in relief.
He misinterpreted my meaning. âIâd happily slow down, Beau, but youâre going to want to be under shelter before that hits.â
We both looked up at the sky.
A solid wall of purple-black cloud was racing in from the west, blackening the forest beneath it as it came.
âWow,â I muttered. âYouâd better hurry, Jake. Youâll want to get home before it gets here.â
âIâm not going home.â
I glared at him, suddenly anxious. âThe tentâs too small for you to camp with us, Jacob.â
âIâm not camping with you. Not technicallyâas in, sharing your tent or anything. I prefer the storm to the smell. But Iâm sure your vampire will want to keep in touch with the pack for coordination purposes, and so I will graciously provide that service.â
âI thought that was Sethâs job.â
âHeâll take over tomorrow, during the fight.â
The reminder silenced me for a second. I stared at him, worry springing up again with sudden fierceness.
âI donât suppose thereâs any way youâd just stay since youâre already here?â I suggested. âIf I did beg? Or trade back a lifetime of servitude or something?â
âTempting, but no. Then again, the begging might be interesting to see. You can give it a go if you like.â
âThereâs really nothing, nothing at all I can say?â
âNope. Not unless you can promise me a better fight. Anyway, Samâs calling the shots, not me.â
That reminded me.
âEdward told me something the other day⊠about you.â
He bristled. âItâs probably not true.â
âOh, really? You arenât second in command of the pack, then?â
He blinked, his face going blank with surprise. âOh. That.â
âHow come you never told me that?â
âWhy would I? Itâs no big thing.â
âI donât know. Why not? Itâs interesting. So, how does that work? How did Sam end up as the Alpha, and you as the⊠the Beta?â
Jacob chuckled at my invented term. âSam was the first, the oldest. It made sense for him to take charge.â
I frowned. âBut shouldnât Jared or Paul be second, then? They were the next to change.â
âWell⊠itâs hard to explain,â Jacob said evasively.
âTry.â
He sighed. âItâs more about the lineage, you know? Sort of old-fashioned. Why should it matter who your grandpa was, right?â
I remembered something Jacob had told me a long time ago, before either of us had known anything about werewolves.
âDidnât you say that Ephraim Black was the last chief the Quileutes had?â
âYeah, thatâs right. Because he was the Alpha. Did you know that, technically, Samâs the chief of the whole tribe now?â He laughed. âCrazy traditions.â
I thought about that for a second, trying to make all the pieces fit. âBut you also said that people listened to your dad more than anyone else on the council, because he was Ephraimâs grandson?â
âWhat about it?â
âWell, if itâs about the lineage⊠shouldnât you be the chief, then?â
Jacob didnât answer me. He stared into the darkening forest, as if he suddenly needed to concentrate on where he was going.
âJake?â
âNo. Thatâs Samâs job.â He kept his eyes on our pathless course.
âWhy? His great-grandad was Levi Uley, right? Was Levi an Alpha, too?â
âThereâs only one Alpha,â he answered automatically.
âSo what was Levi?â
âSort of a Beta, I guess.â He snorted at my term. âLike me.â
âThat doesnât make sense.â
âIt doesnât matter.â
âI just want to understand, Jake.â
He finally met my confused gaze, and then sighed. âYeah. I was supposed to be the Alpha.â
My eyebrows pulled together. âSam didnât want to step down?â
âHardly. I didnât want to step up.â
âWhy not?â
He frowned, uncomfortable with my questions.
âI didnât want any of it, Beau. I didnât want anything to change. I didnât want to be some legendary chief. I didnât want to be part of a pack of werewolves, let alone their leader. I wouldnât take it when Sam offered.â
I thought about this for a long moment. Jacob didnât interrupt. He stared into the forest again.
âBut I thought you were happier. That you were okay with this,â I finally whispered.
Jacob smiled down at me reassuringly. âYeah. Itâs really not so bad. Exciting sometimes, like with this thing tomorrow. But at first it sort of felt like being drafted into a war you didnât know existed. There was no choice, you know? And it was so final.â He shrugged. âAnyway, I guess Iâm glad now. It has to be done, and could I trust someone else to get it right? Itâs better to make sure myself.â
I stared at him, feeling an unexpected kind of awe for my friend. He was more of a man than Iâd ever given him credit for. Like with Billy the other night at the bonfire, there was a majesty here that Iâd never suspected.
âChief Jacob,â I whispered, smiling at the way the words sounded together.
He rolled his eyes.
âItâs kind of sexy.â I impulsively teased, but I regretted it immediately seeing the way he smirked in response.
âOh, is it?â He grinned.
âI didnât mean to give you any ideas.â I sighed.
He laughed.
Just then, the wind shook more fiercely through the trees around us, and it felt like it was blowing straight off a glacier. The sharp sound of wood cracking echoed off the mountain. Though the light was vanishing as the grisly cloud covered the sky, I could still see the little white specks that fluttered past us.
Jacob stepped up the pace, keeping his eyes on the ground now as he flat out sprinted. I curled more willingly against his chest, recoiling from the unwelcome snow.
It was only minutes later that he dashed around to the lee side of the stony peak and we could see the little tent nestled up against the sheltering face. More flurries were falling around us, but the wind was too fierce to let them settle anywhere.
âBeau!â Edward called out in acute relief. Weâd caught him in the middle of pacing back and forth across the little open space.
He flashed to my side, sort of blurring as he moved so swiftly. Jacob cringed, and then set me on my feet. Edward ignored his reaction and caught me in a tight hug.
âThank you,â Edward said over my head. His tone was unmistakably sincere. âThat was quicker than I expected, and I truly appreciate it.â
I twisted to see Jacobâs response.
Jacob merely shrugged, his face looked sad to me. âGet him inside. This is going to be badâmy hairâs standing up on my scalp. Is that tent secure?â
âI all but welded it to the rock.â
âGood.â
Jacob looked up at the skyânow black with the storm, sprinkled with the swirling bits of snow. His nostrils flared.
âIâm going to change,â he said. âI want to know whatâs going on back home.â
He hung his jacket on a low, stubby branch, and walked into the murky forest without a backward glance.










