#e-rated

Yes. I did it. I gave a Tingler title to a fic. Are you happy.

Summary: Making ends meet is hard for anyone in this economy, and Aziraphale doesn’t judge his (objectively attractive) flatmates for doing so on OnlyFans. Not even when they… do… so… in the room right next to his.

But now Eric is moving away, leaving Crowley with no-one to film with. Whatever are they to do?

In which Aziraphale lets slip too much, Eric has some bright ideas, and Crowley offers to seduce his best mate on camera, as you do.

Tags/warnings: Shameless smut, sex worker Crowley, various sex acts, improbable refractory periods, top Crowley/bottom Aziraphale, Really Loud Sex, offscreen Crowley/Eric, minor dubcon vibes (everyone is into it though), crimes against improbably flimsy kitchen cabinets, brief slightly rude treatment of a Pratchett book.

Excerpt:

“How are you going to keep filming?” Aziraphale burst out before he could stop himself, then cringed. “That is to say. Ah. It’s hardly any of my business – I was – I simply – how you might be going to – if you don’t have – oh God please ignore me.” He covered his face with his free hand. Eric cackled, spilled wine on themself, and swore. Crowley tipped his head backwards to empty his glass. “Guess I’ll just have to fuck you instead,” he said lightly. “No other choice, is there?” Eric cackled louder. Aziraphale gave an exaggerated scoff. “Oh, please.” “Well, since y’re asking nicely…”

Read on AO3 (6.1k words) ➡️

This fic was based on smutty art by @gleafer, and in part inspired by @hazel-sage's camboy!Aziraphale.

New fic in the collection for regular commenters. This is the E-rated version of (Un)Conditional. Very e-rated, so mind the tags.

While I have your attention, I’m gonna self-rec the heck out of this. I had so much fun with it and I think you will too. If you’d like some soft!Dom Crowley and South Downs vibes, this is for you.

The unspoken had been spoken, the world had been saved – twice. Nothing was hidden or miracled away. Aziraphale was hard, and Crowley knew it. Aziraphale was hard because Crowley wanted him that way.

Our Story - 15 chapters/squares. @buddiebingo​

Rated: Explicit. Words - 12523

Tags/Warning: Violence. Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Hurt Christopher Diaz,  (9-1-1 TV), Hurt Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Worried Evan "Buck" Buckley, no beta we die like men, Buddie Bingo 2021 (9-1-1 TV), Maddie Buckley & Eddie Diaz Friendship, Humor, Time Skips, Athena Grant and Bobby Nash are Evan "Buck" Buckley's Parents, Hurt/Comfort, Beaches, off-screen saving kids, Medical Inaccuracies, Evan "Buck" Buckley Takes Care of Eddie Diaz, Rate change to Explicit, Friends to Lovers, Camping, Firefighter Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), First Dates, Canon Compliant, Christopher Diaz is a National Treasure, Trapped, Angst, Domestic Fluff, Violence, Protective Evan "Buck" Buckley, Internalized Homophobia, Timeline What Timeline, Scars

Scorn and the Saint-Maker, chapter 53: A voice from behind me reminds me

Scorn and the Saint-Maker is a murder mystery/ineffable husbands romance/who-turned-them-human Good Omens fanfic, set at a university in Scotland, with lots of (as-yet skippable) level-5 smut, ✨sexy maths✨ (passed peer review ✅), and one trans angel

Chapter 53 summary: Let's go to London, shall we?

Rating: Chapter rated T for language. Fic rated E for skippable smut and instances of M-rated, heavy topics (please see tags).

No real CNs, but a mild cliffhanger that might make you rather cross with me.

Excerpt:

Anthony ducked his head to look at him over the rims of his glasses. “Hey. Are you all right?” Fell smiled stiffly. “Perfectly, yes. Ah, tip-top. Absol—” “If you tell me ‘tickety-boo’, I will pick up that flower pot and hit you over the head with it.” Fell stopped walking. Anthony frowned. “I’m not sure why I said that.” Fell swallowed. “I’m not sure I’ve ever said ‘tickety-boo’,” he said. Anthony’s left eyebrow twitched. “Perhaps it’s… just the sort of thing you would say.” Doctor Fell brushed down the front of his coat. His fingers itched for something to tug on.

Read chapter 53 on AO3 ➡️ or start from the beginning ↩️ (226k words, WIP)

Turns out I posted the first and second chapter of this monstrosity two years ago today. ...fuck.

I neglected to share here when I posted chapter 54, so it gets to tag along too.

Chapter 54: Intermezzo: Don’t hear the bell(e) but you answer the call A cloudy morning in late September and a night six and a half months later…

Chapter 55: We found the right location Four men people entities meet in a bookshop…

Rating: Chapter 54 rated T and chapter 55 rated E for skippable smut. Fic rated E for skippable smut and instances of M-rated, heavy topics (please see tags).

Notices/warnings: Implied gruesome death, mild gender dysphoria, safeword use, a moment of arguable dubcon

Excerpt (from ch. 55):

Doctor Fell tried a smile, but only made it about halfway. Doctor Crowley scowled deeply enough to compete with his demonic namesake. In their defence, there are some matters that the human mind is simply not built to grapple with. It’s a bit like showing a neutron star to a fruit fly. “Haven’t seen you on your feet before.” The demonic namesake came to a stop facing their human double, watching him down the length of a sharp nose. “Or conscious.” Their upper lip pulled back for a moment, showing a row of unsettlingly normal teeth. “Hm. Left off the drink, have we?” A quick twitch of an eyebrow; not exactly approval, but might serve for it in a pinch. “Good for you.”

A piney Good Omens one-shot

Hello and welcome to the little one-shot-slash-bonus-scene that I didn't have time to write but wrote anyway

(It's an independent Scorn and the Saint-Maker bonus scene. You don't need to have read anything else to enjoy this.)

Rating: Explicit (who do you take me for) Words: 1.8k Tags: Masturbation, pining, PWP, self-edging, sexual fantasy. Watch out for purple prose.

The humans reminded him far too much of them. Perhaps that was why he was still so affected. He had seen human couples kiss many times; he was used to the sight, as would anyone be after even a single decade on God’s Earth, let alone millennia. There was nothing shocking about it. It did not, normally, cause him this manner of trouble. A record set itself to playing, softly, on the gramophone. Aziraphale squeezed his eyes closed, gave in, and slipped a hand onto his lap. The strings, much like other things, swelled.

Crowley left twenty minutes ago. Aziraphale puts on a record (well, the record puts on itself) and fails to wipe the human couple, who looked a little too much like himself and the demon, from his mind.

Continue reading on AO3 (1.8k words)!

This is basically as much as I dare to put on Tumblr. Uh... even then I'm a bit nervous about the height of my crop here, lol.

Anyway I made an art that's rather shameless the other day, I'm kind of proud of it, it's got an AO3 work now if you want to see what happens below chest height: