#dyisi

Fox Mother And The Faerie Meadow

How alike we are, the Fairy Queen and me, the Fox Mother. Centuries and continents and worlds divided, and yet we were born from the same desire, the same seeking if you will. We are the longing to explain the ineffable. We are the why the full pot of rice has disappeared without a sound. We are the chiming bell of Fate, though perhaps not Fate Herself.

Greetings from Fox Mother

Perhaps this is…

Fate In Lamented Fens

Fate steps up from the depths

Will you know it? Will you know that moment, the one where Fate turns? So many folk, they don’t know it, even when they look back on it. If only, they think, if only I had known. If only my fate had made itself more clear to me.

Oh, my sweet child.

Hello.

Deceptive Moonlight

You have asked, and I have come. We are together now. Don’t mind the colour of the sky: here…

Still Standing in San Mora

You know what? I don’t care any more. You know what? I don’t care any more. I’ve been living in this city for gods know how long, and I’ve watched the people come and go, and I’m just not interested in any of their bull any more. I will walk where I want, dress how I want, eat what I want, go out at night without a burly male escort, and if anybody wants to stop me, well. They’ll have to go…

Deer and Loafing in the Fairelands

It all started one night, early in the Great Fantasy Faire, when I and some of my favourite beings had arranged to meet at a favourite skin-painter and fantasy clothing and jewellery maker, The Plastik. I arrived first, of course (I’m always early, despite what they say about me). The atmosphere inside the store in the Realm of Chaddul Ro was festive, to say the least, and I found myself caught…

It seems I have found myself quite beyond the usual sphere that I am used to inhabiting. Such news I view as a boon, as more distance between my lingering self and the place of my death can only be a good thing. The lens of memory haunts me enough without the physicality of what happened confronting me on a daily basis. There are other details, too, which prove this to be a positive development. Shortly after finding my way to the nearest settlement, I ran into none other than Dyisi. After I left the Port I had very little hope of seeing any of my friends from that place again, but...It seems that we are meant to meet again. Not only her, but Xanus. Admittedly I am not as close with him as I am with Dyisi, but some bits of familiarity in this new place are comforting.

There are also a variety of new faces I have become acquainted with and look forward to knowing better. Wren, the adjutant of this village known as Mysthaven, was kind enough to fill me in on the pertinent details required to reside here. She was also quite enthusiastic about learning of my condition, which I found rather quaint, considering prior experiences. Beyond that I have also met the steward, Nathaniel, as well as Miss Aoibheann, whom in particular I am relieved did not take poorly to my presence. I have briefly greeted others as well I am sure I will see around as I settle in here.

To say that my short time here has already been quite eventful would be an understatement. The full moon happened promptly after my wandering into the village, which appears to be an especially dangerous time in this place...But beyond that, I was finally able to meet the lord of the village. Herr Maric is...something to behold, I suppose, is the best way to pen it. Someone like myself certainly doesn’t deserve to be in his presence nor hold any of his attention for any extended period of time, but nonetheless, that is what happened. I find a strange sort of solace in his presence, albeit one that is at war with the shackles of my worry and fear. Some mixture of this I am used to ever since Herr Reinhardt deemed it necessary to discard of me, but-- this is, in a sense, different.

While I am still rather surprised that I was able to earn his good will and blessing to tend the library, I am also extremely grateful. It has already been quite a comfort to me to be able to go over the tomes and sort them as necessary...Without that ability I am not sure I would have been able to calm down as quickly as I did after the turn in our conversation.

Now, before this meeting with Herr Maric, I had discussed briefly with Dyisi the idea of creating me a body utilizing certain sciences, magic and alchemy. Of course such a thing would be a miracle to someone in my state, and I was eager to pursue the idea. Given the size and experimental nature of such an undertaking, she told me she would want to speak with Herr Maric about it, and thus that is what happened.

Shortly after receiving permission to tend the books and stay within the castle, Herr Maric summoned Dyisi so we could all discuss. And it appears that it is something he is willing to aid with, one way or the other, but I cannot be certain as to why. Dyisi, at least, I can understand her motivation, being a friend and also seeing it as an intellectual pursuit that could be exciting...But Herr Maric, I... do not understand. It is not my place to question him, of course, and I am extremely grateful for not only his kindness and hospitality in allowing me to be his librarian, but also this...Whatever this may end up being.

Dyisi had a plan that would involve a puppet of sorts and a long wait and experimentation. Herr Maric had made commentary that seems to speak of the ability to simply carve me a body wholesale from his own form. The fact that he would even offer such is still ricocheting around my psyche -- the more I try to understand it the more baffling it becomes. There is, of course, the implication that such would mean that I would belong fully to him, and that is a frightening price, even to me, and yet...

Why?

He said that everyone deserves a second chance at life. Especially me. I do not understand how he could say such a thing so easily. Perhaps it is because I have yet to fail him, and that makes such kindness easier. I am not sure I could handle disappointing another again, I will have to be exceptionally careful to not do so. The mere thought burns, history cannot repeat itself. I will not let it...

And so it seems that I have a choice to make.

Dyisi’s original plan, in which I would be beholden to them both in a less severe manner...

Or Herr Maric’s offer, with the implication that I may yet again become a tool for a Vampir?

The fact that such a decision is such a struggle I am sure would perplex others, and yet it is.

I...

I require more data, possibly. Perhaps I should inquire into the details of how such a thing would work, when Herr Maric has the time and inclination. It may be easier to process hard facts and make it easier to ignore the weight of emotion.