#dv cw

Don't you understand? I won't feel loved until I see your eyes go black & watch you cave into your need of ending my life by your hands.

Isn't that what we always talk about?

But when it comes down to reality, you refuse to lay a single finger on my skin.

Considering I haven't eaten this since The Dark Days I'm hoping I don't have a PTSD spiral over it. Because I'm still reclaiming things, and still unsure what my triggers are because they're so ??? Obscure?? Half the time.

TW; mentions of domestic violence, physical and psychological abuse.

Aries didn’t understand how it had devolved so quickly; the sound of the bottle shattering against the wall rang in her ears. Shoulders hunched and cuts stinging the back of her bare legs, glass catching in her perfectly styled hair. Makeup streaked down her face as the man screamed and screamed at her.

“You’re so selfish! I wanted to have a good night, but you can’t help but make everything about you! You’re useless. It’s no wonder all of your other friends leave you.” He spat, barely held back by the arms of his girlfriend, and as Aries attempted to open her mouth to defend herself, to understand what she had done wrong, her mouth was covered by the final member of the group.

The other girl shook her head, “Just let it go. You’re just going to make it worse. Just let him yell.”

But she couldn’t. The night had been well, and he had suddenly switched– she hadn’t even said anything to him, except to ask what was wrong. 

Aries wrenched the hand over her lips away, a wail escaping her throat as she made her way to the front door. Air, I need air. I can't breathe-

Searing, tingling pain exploded throughout her scalp as she cried out, the boy’s fingers tangled in her hair as he held on with all his strength. She fought against the hold, while his girlfriend cooed and soothed and ripped him away, and finally she twisted the doorknob and ran into the dark, cold night. No shoes, no coat, no phone. She ran until her thighs burned and her chest ached, collapsing in the grass behind a dumpster.

She closed her eyes, sobbing and hiccuping with the force of her cries. Pulling her knees to her chest, she rocked for warmth and tried to drown out the voices in her head. You’re selfish, everyone hates you, everything you do is fake. No one could ever love you…

Three against one, so it must be me.

~334 words

v;   somewhere   on   the   thoroughfare   

cw; dv mention

mayven   falls   in   love   easily   and   found   herself   falling   for   the   wrong   sort   of   man   —   a   nypd   detective   with   a   short   temper   and   a   mean   tongue:   ryan   anderson.   they   get   married   and   she   was   young   and   dewey   eyed   and   thought   his   violence   came   at   the   price   of   loving   her.   but   one   day   things   get   taken   too   far   and   she’s   forced   to   defend   herself,   stabbing   him   and   leaving   him   to   die   in   the   kitchen.   she   runs   with   nothing   but   the   cash   in   her   wallet   and   a   few   clothes   shoved   into   the   bottom   of   a   backpack.   she   takes   a   greyhound   out   of   state   and   travels   out   west,   on   various   buses   and   hitchhiking   —   fleeing   the   scene   of   what   she   believes   to   be   a   murder.   settling   down   in   a   small   town   in   the   country   she   tell   people   her   name   is   mary   moore   and   she   works   a   normal   job   in   town   while   trying   to   stay   out   of   trouble.   

this   can   be   plotted   to   go   one   of   two   ways;   

—   her   husband   is   dead   and   now   she’s   on   the   run   for   murder.

—   her   husband   lives   and   is   on   a   manhunt   to   find   her.

other   potential   connections;

NPR was replaying this 1992 interview with rapper Melle Mel as I was driving home

(conversation around town) OH? Are you asking about ALINA KOROLEVA? They're the owner of Bewitched and Bewildered, right? I went there the other day the shop is so cute. It's a wiccan supplies & second-hand bookstore. She seems to be a bit inattentive at times but overall very kind. I can't wait to visit again and see if they have any new books in stock.

Alina Koroleva is a 23-year-old gender-nonconforming person who uses She/They pronouns. Alina moved to Denver just under a year ago and is still getting her feet on the ground while trying to get her business up and running. They hope it'll become a safe place for all of the humans who live in the city and want avoid more mainstream stores.