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Melina walking in on Kate and Yelena: hmm… girls I understand you’re young but could you at least be courteous and not fornicate on the table you invited us to dinner to eat on
Alexei: MY EYES!!! MY LITTLE GIRL NOOOO
Alexei the pig: oink oink
LMAOOOOOO that's basically how it goes yeah. Pretty accurate I'd say
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bro am i a furry if i wish i had a gf who could purr
i just laughed so loud i woke my dog up omfg
Ayee whatchu drinkin? I've been switchen between Sam Adams and Ciderboys
Ayyyyyy ciderboys is my absolute favorite. Which kind?!? I’m drinking some bourbon at the moment
Oh! We're doing spicy Yelena & Kate?! Yay or Nay to public sex?
I mean.........................I think it depends on the situation and what you define as "public"???
Like...scenario: Stuffy work gala. Yelena is already annoyed to begin with. Kate's in a sexyyyyyyy little number and all the sharks are circling. Dude keeps over stepping. His hand keeps finding his way to the small of Kate's back. And Yelena is all 😡😡😡. She SHAMELESSLY smacks the dude's hand away at one point and Kate is like "very cute...I love you...but don't make a scene." Half an hour later. Prick returns. Hand is on Kate's back again. Yelena yanks Kate away. And Kate is like "???????????". Yelena is like "there's two choices...we're either gonna go over there or I'm going to kill him." Cuz she gets HELLA territorial when she gets jealous. There's a stairwell and Yelena drags Kate into it just to remind her who she came to the party with and whose are the only hands that should be on her.
Weird question but did they have dildos in the olden times or was it all uhm manual labor 🖖
The emoji choice.................
Yes, they had dildos before LOLOLOLOL. I feel like they've found them in basically all time periods going back to prehistoric. Human beings have been shoving shit where they shouldn't since the dawn of time.
Fun fact: when I was doing research some time ago for Italy AU I found out that nuns were doing each other pretty fucking openly in medieval Italy, to the point where the church had to be like "Y'ALL NEED TO FUCKING STOP!!!" and had to sanction them very harshly.
So...medieval nuns had dildos jfksjfjejfjdf and wrote each other some uhm...intense letters. But outside of that there's very little record of lesbians in the middle ages in italy. Mostly just because no one kept records of what women were doing cuz...y'know...historically no one has every fucking cared about women. But there is mild proof that there obviously were. And they were split into two categories. Just like "emotional" lesbians and the "sexual" lesbians. So basically the Lesbians who loved women but didn't do anything about it and the ones who uh did. There's only one single drawing/painting depicting sex between two women and it's...........interesting lol. But...yeah. That's my history lesson on Italian medieval lesbians.
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Has our Oinky Boy Alexei ever walked in on Kate and Yelena having sex?
Why and HOW would that ever be a possible scenario? He lives with Melina? Why would Kate and Yelena be having sex at Melina's house? And why would he - a hyper-intelligent pig - be waltzing into bedrooms/rooms unannounced? Also, he can't reach doorknobs?
WHAT UNLIKELY SERIES OF EVENTS WOULD HAVE TO HAPPEN FOR THIS TO BE A THING?
In this house we don't say f**t**g we ask "Do Kate and Yelena cradle their lover's heart?"
We don't say ANYTHING about it lol. No direct words. No euphemisms. No codes. Hands stay open at all times. No other positions.
If it gets more eyes on Dickinson let them call you Lubehead, Countess of Gush, Lady of the Most Thirsty Order of Trap or any other name under the sun lmao
COUNTESS OF GUSH
I'm just............
