#dr blackgaard

Do you think Jason had nightmares about Dr Blackgaard after A Name Not A Number?

Do you think he felt guilty?

Do you think he didn't understand why someone would so willingly offer up their life for his?

Do you think it kept him awake at night, feeling sick to his stomach, because the seemingly extremely kind man was dead and all because of Jason?

Do you think that when he heard Blackgaard on the radio, he wasnt angry, he was hopeful because if Blackgaard wasn't dead, then that weight didn't have to rest on his conscience?

But then Blackgaard turns out to be evil. He turns out to have terrorised his father and friends. Turns out he had been a bad guy the entire time. Evil in fact.

And then

And then

Jack Allen is in the tunnel. And the bomb goes off. And this person that Jason had been having nightmares about. This man that Jason thought died for him. This man killed his friend. Killed his friend right after they reconciled.

And Jason blames himself again. Because he didn't stop him. Because he didn't figure it out sooner. Because he spent months having survivors guilt and wishing Blackgaard back only for him to suddenly want Blackgaard dead. Only to regret everything he had thought and wished and prayed for.

Of course he wanted to fight. Of course he didn't like Jack not doing anything. This man had died for him and he had felt the guilt and now all that guilt was a lie. He had been suffering in silence for months, carrying a guilt he legally couldn't share, and suddenly Blackgaard was there. He was there and hurting people he cared about.

I'm just saying that Jason had to have had serious psychological problems after that. The world was spiralling around him. This is where the spiral started. It really doesn't end until Home Again.

Makes you wonder what would have happened if Blackgaard had won. What would be the worst case scenario.

But still with possibility of hope and a good ending...