#doctors notes

This ones literally my favorite ever

Good Patients Don’t Have Warning Labels by WingsofWinter https://archiveofourown.org/works/75798176 and the prequel, I recommend reading this one first but do what u want lol.

Delayed Frames by WingsofWinter https://archiveofourown.org/works/72573856

-

Obviously be sure to read the tags, we're drawing and reading/writing whump in this house so expect themes of that nature lol

-@a-lost-identity

Yes I can! I'll likely have it up by the wnd of the day! If not tomorrow!

Yesterday i finally went to urgent care about a repeat hip injury. I ended up arguing with my doctor because she kept focusing on describing to me how i would be reacting to the pain level she thought i should be in for the injury i thought it was, instead of focusing on less subjective symptoms and talking to me about differential diagnoses. I ended our argument by telling her that, as a chronic pain patient, i know i experience pain differently than other people and it's dumb to try and focus on describing the pain level. At that point we were able to move forward and answer some of my questions. I felt like I had to drag answers out of her, but nonetheless my questions mostly got answered. I don't regret using the word "dumb," i think it's what got her attention.

It takes me awhile to decompress after appointments like this. My partner who went with me, later described how when we have doctors like this, it sometimes feels like we're dissecting a new trauma as we try to sort out what happened after we leave. And honestly i think he's onto something. I exit these appointments in a panic state, not sure if i managed to communicate well enough or if they believed me or if the visit was even worth my while. I cry after them sometimes. I almost always bring them up in therapy after.

Ultimately I think, hours after I left, i was able to piece together what we had said and synthesize the relevant information in a way that I can semi-confidently move forward with the condition. But the memory registers fuzzy even though it was yesterday.

I've been very busy with university work. One of the things I have had the pleasure of doing in our capstone project is custom shaders. Thankfully I was able to jump in with last year game design students to work with them rather than make a boring piece of software for a client that isn't paying me. I'm in a computer science degree and my major is cybersecurity so it's fucking stupid they make me be a programmer for the capstone given object oriented programming wasn't even a core unit. Thankfully my knowing C & art skill qualifies me for the role of technical artist, which still technically counts as softare dev for the most part...!