#dissolves

Hypothetically speaking, if I were to agree this caveman to be my roommate, I fear he might claim my property as his and possibly kick ME out of MY house. Whether that happens or not, I'm either dying as a homeless chud on the streets or having my skull be reduced to a mashed potato. Apparently, owning a MASSIVE cave system and a maze is not enough.

I believe, there could be a slight chance of him letting me coexist as long as I don't bother him and his peculiar activities. Though, I'm not certain how I'd manage to convince him, but what I do know is this unc definitely lived in a time period when 'em property prices didn't cost him his whole life savings. Again, the properties that are under his name are surely stolen too.

With that out of the way - let's picture this very unlikely, delusional scenario, in which I'm lucky enough to receive his generosity and we are both living under the same roof.

So, having him as my roommate wouldn't necessarily be an inconvenience to me, because from what I gathered from the games, personality wise, he's responsible. Also, He's a plant person, I respect that. We already have something in common. I'm not against the idea of him decorating the place with plants.

Zahrada, however, occasionally murders people. A nasty habit, indeed. At least, he would likely clean after himself. As a matter of fact, I wouldn't even know he obliterated a guy, unless he decides to tell me on a random tuesday. To taunt me, to threaten me.

Moreover, Zahrada is a hard-working man! So far, so good. Four good qualities - responsible, hard-working, clean and decorative! I really cannot ask for more! Though, in my opinion, he might be a bit of a workaholic. Considering the amount of effort and time he puts into whatever he's brewing in his pot, he's prone to mood swings. Maybe, stress too. Resulting in him yelling at me for breathing the wrong way, but it's fine.

I'd suggest ideas for relaxation - we could have movie nights. Shrugs

Boy would be hardly at home, I guess. Too busy grinding.

Pumpkin Jack

FIRST OFF, I am NOT trustin' this SLACKER with ANYTHING. Unlike Zahrada, Jack is IRRESPONSIBLE, NOT AS COMPETENT and LAZY. Oh, certainly, he wouldn't think to even clean after himself either! He be endin' lives as well as any other characters from the games. One day, I'm gonna arrive home to a horrific stench and see a corpse laying ON MY USED TO BE SCRUBBY CLEAN FLOOR in the living room.

Honestly? I think he'd warn me about his flaws, so I know what I'm signing up for. He's honest, and self-aware. Dare I say, he would be a pleasant company... To some extent. If i turn a blind eye to his bad habits. It's not like he doesn't know how to be a better roommate - he does.

He's the type of pumpkin who would use his charm for whatever benefits him. Admittedly, I'd be easily swooned.

As he is a SLACKER, I'd be finding him mostly at home. SLACKING OFF. MEANING, We could be actually spending time to bond! I can see him telling genuinely funny jokes. NOW, I KNOW HE HAS AN EXCELLENT SENSE OF HUMOR! TRUST ME, HE'S HUMOROUS.

At the end of the day, he's a chill guy. He's not quick to fume with anger. Oftentimes, he would try to ragebait me for fun.

Unfortunately, my place would be filled with pumpkin crawlers.

Drought

Drought is inviting himself in.

DOWNRIGHT HORRID INTRUDER, NOT ROOMMATE. He's breaking and entering.

He thinks he's funny, but in reality he belongs in a mental asylum. He's gonna do pranks that would cost me my life.

His stunts would consist of him scaring the angels out of me, putting spiders in my tea and the list goes on.