It's been seemingly ages since I last winded down my evenings scrolling endlessly through Tumblr. In my teens, Tumblr was a haven, and now in my late twenties, I have found myself drawn back here. I'm not sure how much the platform has changed but I know I have changed so much over the past decade. Regardless, I find comfort in returning to a place of familiarity in a digital world that, especially recently, seems to be changing dramatically and constantly.
My goal this time around is a little different. As a teenager, I marveled at the creations of others, often dreaming of making my own someday. Despite having a perfectly fine camera and a burning creative spirit, I never allowed myself to share with others. Mostly out of embarrassment and shyness, but also because I didn't believe I could create something worthy of "notes", "shares", or "likes". Looking back on my teenage mindset, I wince. You don't notice it at the moment, however, the limiting perspective that art should only be shared online to garner digital applause has clouded the potential of so many. Art should be created and shared out of the desire to create and share, it should not be based upon its potential for binary accolades. Of course, as an adult, I understand that now. This is why, my mission this time is not to hoard inspiration but to channel it into something of my own. I don't want to be a passive observer of the arts, but rather an active and enthusiastic participant in it.
I'd like to believe I am more grounded now, with my frontal lobe developed and whatnot, to be less preoccupied or plagued with questions like "Who will even see this?" I am here for the process, not the recognition. Creating art and sharing it in this space feels right. I don't think I am alone when I say Instagram, TikTok (whose fate is still undecided), and other platforms do not offer the same artistic freedom I've only seen on Tumblr.
My Tumblr is a catchall for my ideas, creations, and more. If someone out there enjoys what I share, thatβs a lovely bonus. If I can make friends, even better. But ultimately, this is a space for me: an unapologetically selfish act of self-expression.