Jun 3
Back on the grind
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Back on the grind
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I'm so damn tired. Every time I think I've never been so tired before, somehow the next day I'm even more tired than i was the day before. At least I got dressed today.
20 Seconds at most.
The world has been shitty lately. And because of that, my depression has been coming back.
So I decided to tell the world to fuck off.
I decided to try again.
I took my meds again. If there’s anything that’s gonna make this feel even a little better, it’s gonna be the fucking meds I’ve been prescribed that are MEANT to make me feel ok.
Something I’ve thought of as a chore is now something I’m going to start thinking of as my “try again”
So yeah, Fuck You, World. I’m gonna try again. And you can’t fucking stop me.
(This is just my little triumphant thing for myself for finally deciding to not let everything make me sad, and for finally choosing to take my meds again.)
I’m proud of myself :)
I’m actually so depressed today and yesterday it’s rather startling. I genuinely feel like I doing have anyone to talk to about it in earnest. That’s my fault, I doing want to be a burden. And I don’t want anyone to see me like this
ya ever just deep dive into fandoms because you don’t want to face how fucked up you are? Cause same
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Dopamine
Wherefore art thou Dopamine
I didn't get to see my Shadow today. She got away and wouldn't come out so I took Wisp and Tabbi to the park. I love them very much, but not seeing Shadow was really hard. I don't know what my face said when it happened, but I felt myself pretend everything was fine. Until I climbed up the hill away from the world and sobbed my fuckng eyes ut like a child. Poor Wisp was very concerned. I can't take this. I need them back. I'm not even allowed to babysit them while the humans are away at a wedding next week. Some stranger is going to take care of them, they'll be so scared. I genuinely can't understand how he could hate me to the point of not allowing me to see them while he's away for DAYS. I'm sure (I hope) everything will be fine, but I will never understand his hate for me. I learned a while ago that he won't even eat something if he finds out I made it or gifted it. I don't wanna talk about it anymore, I just want my Shadow. I want all my babies. I need them. I don't think I'll make it through this Winter without them.