#depressedmood

Oh how I dreamt of taking a life and it was my own…

I’ve got too many mixed emotions in me right now. Like I want to work hard, but then I want to quit. I want to create my own world, but then I want to let it crumble. I want to laugh, but then I want to cry. I want to touch the stars, but then I don’t have the energy to reach them. What has the world become? What have I become? There are times I wonder if this is all there is for me. There are times I wonder what if I’m wasting away? What if I’m a lost cause? I feel like I’m going in circles and I can’t control it. Sometimes I just want peace. I want to shut up my mind. Sometimes I wish I didn’t desire to die. Sometimes I just want to close my eyes and just dream forever and never have to wake up. I have too many regrets and there’s this part of me I wish I could get away from, but will always live. This pain I feel is too unbearable and I feel trapped here and there’s nothing I can do. I am trying to be patient and I am trying to be calm. But it’s hard, my goodness it’s really hard…

Life is so ironic isn't ?? , it take sadness to find happiness , it takes noise to appreciate the silence , and absence to value presence.