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Why I think I'll have a big cry this week:
Sister got married
My partner bought a house, I haven't managed to find a rental apartment in a year
The passage of time
Angsty emo teenage me vs. Mid-twenties adult me
Dan and Phil got to a point in their lives where they found enough peace of mind to be more open about their relationship + podcast announcement
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I try not to dwell on the notion of "fairness" in my personal life, because life isn't fair, and it's pointless to want it to be fair. It's so much easier to accept that and press forward. But man. It's really not fair that my "friends" chose him over me 🥲
Don't tell me you drank an old mans pee on a first date, it freaked me out ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
:[
I like you so much BUT THAT'S NOT AN APPROPRIATE THING TO SAY ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Life with delayed emotional processing be like:
Them, watching me be completely calm in an incredibly upsetting situation: You're so easy going.
Me three days, super upset just chilling the couch: I don't understand. I'm so easy going though ;;_;;
So I often experience my emotions with a lag, especially the negative ones. The plus side is sometimes I can be very cool and levelheaded during a crisis and go "wow weirdly I don't even feel that upset right now"
The minus side is that I then have a panic attack at midnight about an incident that is now in the past, perhaps even fully resolved
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Good news, No longer dissociating throughout life!
Bad news, all the feelings are coming through now. All of it still happened, and you have to just sit there and bear it.
Delayed emotional processing is frustrating bc when the shit happens im like yeah ok whatever sounds good n then days/weeks/mos later I b like wait what the FUCK
Processing… Processing…
If I figure it out, I’ll tell you how I felt about what happened the other dayat some point in the future… Perhaps sam As I pay closer attention to how I process the world differently—internally and externally, you may see more pieces like this. © 2026 Ociola Samantha Williams. All Rights Reserved.
