#deepposting

everything Clay says to Luke at every moment in this book is just thinly veiled confessions. you were my brother, you still are my brother, i love you and you know that, please stop loving me, i’m asking you to hate me and hoping that you love me, i’m scared of myself, are you scared of me? i want to house you inside of me but before that i want to keep you safe, you’re not safe around me, i’m not safe around you, they’re using me to get to you because they know we love each other, why do you still love me? i love you therefore i hate you therefore i never want to see you again, but i do. don’t call me again, i say, as i call you to your death. your eyes were the last eyes i ever looked into and i wouldn’t have it any other way. the last thing i said to you wasn’t “i love you” but it was a plea for your safety and that’s the same thing to me. i wish i was different, i wish you were different, i wish i was your wife and i kind of am. i don’t love you in a way you understand, you wouldn’t understand. we’re brothers, we’re the same person, we’re married, we’re divorced. if violence is the only thing you have left to give me, i’ll accept it. brother dear, said mockingly because what the hell would you do if you knew i was serious.

AU where the Fig Men minded their own damn business and the voice message Luke got was just Clayton drunk as hell calling him from a pay phone at 3 am

Luke calling Clayton “a creature of stupid instinct” +1 point for my Clayton (The Deep)/Harry (The Queen) propaganda