#deeppoem

I'm on a first name basis with The Darkness,

You see we've gotten very well acquainted over the past couple of months,

It happened slowly, then all at once,

The Darkness has always been there,

Lurking in the shadows,

Waiting on the perfect moment to manifest itself,

Waiting on the perfect moment to strike,

Waiting on the perfect moment to push The Light out of the way,

You see,

The Darkness gets me like The Light never will,

And truth is,

The Darkness took the time to get to know me,

It would talk to me when The Light wouldn't,

It would hush all my fears,

Hold me when I cry,

Tell me everything won't be okay right now, but it will be okay eventually,

It wouldn't lie to me like how The Light does,

The Darkness always tells the truth,

And The Darkness isn't jealous like The Light is,

It would never fight for my time,

It just waited patiently for the right moment,

It waited until it knew I needed it the most,

I used to have a battle with The Light and The Dark,

But in fact,

It was never a battle,

It was the Darkness there for me the whole time,

Just waiting, hoping, wishing, I would see The Darkness for who it really is,

I've fallen to The Darkness,

Succumb to it,

And I feel like a brand new person,

Im behind

Above

In front

And below him

I pull his strings

I'm his puppet master

His heart belongs to me

He owns nothing

I'm what's inside

I'm his demons

I'm his failure

His sadness

And all his hatred

I'm what will take him from everything

I'm the insanity that lurks

And all the low self confidence he has

Ill take him from everyone

He means nothing

And is nothing

He can't amount to anything in this world

He won't find love

He can't find it

Who wants a broken tool

Who wants a child who only cries

In the end

Zach is just the toy I play with

The puppet I use to amuse myself

And the toy ill throw away

Because he won't be needed

It's embarrassing

That it's so sad

Your absence

Is driving me mad

I want to smile

I want to shine

It breaks my heart

That you're no longer mine

What did I do?

How can this be?

That you're not

Here with me

It was magical when our two souls momentarily connected,

Yet sadly we drifted apart.

I needed you in my head,

I wanted you with all my heart.

Mind over matter.

Being with you I don’t mind,

But when I wanted you, did it matter?

My feelings are all intertwined.

It takes 21 days to break a habit

But is that really true?

Because it's been six months

And I'm still in love with you

I don't know why I fell this deep

For someone that never cared

I've always been cautious of who I trust

But with you I wasn't scared

The heart wants what it wants

But maybe not what it needs

It was my fault for opening my heart

Because now it only bleeds

At first I thought you were my medicine

I thought you was starting to cure me

But you turned out to be my poison

That was slowing starting to kill me

I wish I could stop this feeling

Or stop the world and make it still

Would it change your mind, how I feel?

I don't think it ever will

While I cry I scream

Not externally but internally

My voice can't be heard

My screams aren't heard

My tears never show

I walk around like shadow

I cry and frown

I want to lash out

I want to scream

I want to show everyone

Show everyone who i am

Tell my peers, yeah I'm strong

I'm not that kid you knew from the playground

I'm not that sad little bitch you see walking around

I'm not who i use to be

I want to show everyone I'm strong

I'm tired

So tired

So exhausted

So dead

Inside and out

I can barely lift my arms

Barely stand in the morning

I don't see a point anymore

Why do I have to wake up

Can you tell some thing

Do you hear my screams right now

Do you hear my screaming voice as I write this

Can you feel the energy bursting from my chest

Can you feel how my I'm ready to jump out of my skin

Do you hear me?

Do you see me crying

Do you know exist?

Can you help me?