#deathnote angst

This second of life, Feels like forever.

Dead character × reader (angst)

“L, are you even listening?”

“I hear you, do you?”

“What?” It comes out more of a sigh.

“Hear yourself, do you?”

“You better not be saying I’m talking crazy for wanting my boyfriend to give me affection.”

His face gives nothing away still, large eyes unblinking as if you’re discussing something minute.

“You know I don’t have enough time and you’re demanding more.”

You throw your hands down from where they had been conjoined in front of you, “No, I’m asking that when you are present with me, you’re actually there. You barely touch me anymore, you hardly talk to me if it’s not an emergency or a favor!”

“So.. you want to have more sexual intercourse.” His thumb is between his lips, lips you haven’t kissed for weeks and lips you want to sew shut to see him struggle like you do when he shushes you to silence.

You’re standing in front of the bed, he’s by the door where’s he been since he came in and you tried to talk to him about his neglect.

“Sure, I don’t know. Just acknowledge me when you spend time with me.” You huff out, irritation pinching your expression.

“If you don’t know, why are you starting a fight?” He asks like it’s a genuine question and not a dig at your attempts at communication that have gone without comprehension. He quirks his head to the side, stepping forth to examine you head-to-toe like you’re a piece of evidence. His gaze is far away, two weeks in the future on a date he’d been awaiting for months but to you it just looks like he’s spacing out, lately a consistent state when he’s around you. It drives you crazy, the insane itch of hatred crawls up your spine and vibrates off of you.

You shake in rage, knowing it’s intentional your crazy smart boyfriend is pretending to be confused until you drop it. It won’t work this time.

You’re done explaining, done begging and suddenly all the fight dies. Your shoulders slump and your expression relaxes, a smirk twitches on L’s face, gone before you can point it out.

You turn around and march towards the closet, soft and purposeful as you reach the bag you’ve packed. You swing it over your shoulder and watch the faint victorious smile fall from his face when you emerge.

You don’t say anything as you pluck your phone from the bed, walking towards where he stands beside the door.

You remember every time you’d pleaded with him and he spun your words like a web around you, sticking you in meanings you both know you hadn’t intended. Every time, he would urge you to get some rest, pecking your cheek before disappearing out of the room and leaving you with teary eyes, trying to make some sense of this so loveless love you lived in.

You stopped by his frame, noting the close friendship between his eyebrows as he tried to mentally explain away your behavior. Ever so slowly, you lifted yourself up on tippy toes and pecked his cheek, leaving a harsh red stain before opening the door and leaving him forever.

You’re not sure if he’s crying, if he misses you but you are sure you’ve done enough of both of those while dating him and now that you’re free, you’re not going to waste anymore time on him.

Light ends up leaving to do his own thing (probably reunite with his family) but then after a few years becomes Kira.

L ends up going on the case because he’s like, “Oh, this is interesting and won’t make me bored.” (Just like in the Manga/Show)

So L is hunting Kira down while silently pining for Light after becoming reunited with him while also truly hoping he’s wrong about Light being Kira.

Obviously i’m switching up the ages a bit so there isn’t as big as a difference. Chapters will come slowly but look out for that on my ao3 i’m working on the first chapter now! https://archiveofourown.org/users/my_weird_fandom