#deathhacks

#DeathHacks #frasesdem3rda . . Segue 👉 @frasesdem3rdabackup (em Casa do Caralho)

#lifehacks #deathhacks #chilis #twitter #prisonlifebutwithsalsa

"My dad had a fixit guy who, like all the other guys in his life, I knew by a last name that I had assumed was his first name. Part employee and part friend, Webster would take my dad’s verbal schematics and turn them into plumbing and electrical structures. I’d run into Webster in town and offhandedly mention that there was a weird fuzz growing in the toilets. He’d explain that they had warm water running in them so that water wouldn’t condense on the outside of the tank during the summertime. This is a thing that old house owners know, apparently. What else didn’t I know to ask about? Webster had installed the hardware for the lighting system but didn’t really understand how it worked. “Your dad really liked things complicated!” he’d say and laugh. He’d say my dad wouldn’t care if his car was in pieces on the garage floor 75% of the time as long as every time he drove it, it ran like a top. It was from my dad that I first heard a smoothly-operating machine called “sexy” (which didn’t always translate) and learned to appreciate the beauty of well-designed systems. A few months into this slow-motion hackathon, we were celebrating my birthday. Friends put spitting smokey sparklers on cupcakes, trying to be festive. A disembodied voice from the ceiling started booming “FIRE! FIRE! FIRE!” which, as it happens, is a line from the Bradbury story. As we extinguished the sparklers and I scrambled to figure out how to stop the yelling, the phone started ringing. A man’s voice at the other end asked me for a password. This is how I learned that the house had an alarm system. The alarm company was local. They’d known my dad, and they patiently stepped me through a series of password hints until I figured it out. The alarm got shut off; we didn’t have to explain it all to the fire department. We finally called some friends of Webster’s, Killer and Moose, real names unknown, to track down the undead transponder in the wall. They used some high tech electricity-finding tool that I immediately wanted to own. The transponder was replaced with a switch to turn the lights on and off by hand. Inelegant, but it always worked. I had to tell myself when it was time for bed."

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