#dearjerry

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↟↟ᗗ↟ᗗ↟↟ Dear Jerry♪ 08/09 〜 PEACE 〜 𖣰 8月に入ってガラッと変わるメニューとそれに伴う準備でバタバタ気味ですが、立ち止まって「PEACE」な本日。 𖣰 新しくなるメニューに乞うご期待で✌️ ↟↟ᗗ↟ᗗ↟↟ #dearjerry #すべての武器を楽器に #JAMTREE #ジャムツリー #千葉 #千葉駅 #裏千葉 #bar #rockbar #djbar #livebar #cafe #バー #カフェ #ハワイ料理 #ジャマイカ料理 #タイ料理 #メキシコ料理 #エスニック料理 #多国籍料理 #rock #reggae #latin #jamband #allgoodmusic #音楽とおいしいに国境なし #JAMる (World Kitchen & Bar JAM TREE)

✌❤🕶🎙🎶🐻☮ #DearJerry

Finally getting around to watching this show #dearjerry #merriweatherpostpavilion #jerrygarcia #gratefuldead (at Eastside, Santa Cruz, California)

Present My inner thoughts and words because i don't have anyone special to tell them to at night lol I haven't written on this blog in a while and i do apologize. Busy busy busy...or maybe just occupied time. Anyways.... To those who do secretly follow this blog and if you have faith or don't, know me personally or just through my online persona or maybe we met like twice over the weekend. I will try to write out more here daily. (Broken promises) Went through some old stuff (remind me of looking through my phone after this piece) growing up and i never realized how poetic i was as a kid. Just a few notebooks and letters i had back when. The ideas or thoughts and letters to myself (like these here) and poems and stories. Quiet interesting to hear your younger self write to the future you (now present tense). Like no wonder i have a thing for music and spoken word. (Expressed feelings and thoughts unable to be spoken) But going off that recently i have been reintroduced to poetry and raps and writing and that maybe i might wanna make something from it. A spoken word piece maybe a song. I don't know yet but i am looking to find passion in something again. Idk if thats the desire or in the moment that will diminish in the near future. Ah, "passion" (as said before) Yes this past weekend had passion and maybe i can honestly say made me phone crazy for now. Checking updates and getting all these social media notifications of new faces and maybe some are reading this letter now and you get a better understanding into my life. As I'm looking through my phone i come across old voicemail(s)... Pondering in my head You ever just forget something and when it comes back its like it was never gone? Well thats what happened tonight and even though it seemed as though she was on the other side of my phone (déjà vu) she wasn't and as i searched through latest to further voicemails i can hear the tone change and the happier she becomes because this was before the problems the thoughts and the pain and...im over thinking.... That was the past...this is now and i was just talking about tonight... Ahhh To the Future Summer is coming...makes me happy (Yes im ignoring that temporary moment of reflection into my past #imamystery) Summer is approaching and my workouts have not yet improved my body for that weather. Good news is that my mom's all four sons are finally back together and the family is all here again. Not under the same roof as im writing this in my own bedroom. But tonight could have been different and maybe i want to be adventurous...(i have a.d.d even when i write LOL) So off topic. Future plans, maybe just write a poem or a song out and learn something on the guitar. Work work work Talk to school Maybe go on a few places to relax and meet new faces. Idk But tonight i write just to write. Havent had anyone to express myself to lately and all this drinking hasnt made me express too much as i wanted either. Maybe my sins are proving to not work but i have been having nightmares these few days. Hearing things and getting hot at night and uncomfortable. Sleepless and tired most of the days now. As if im not alive and that not good. Gotta hit the gym more but work has been a killer. Maybe i need to worship or pray or relight my faith. Im kinda just everywhere and doing everything right now not really focused and starting tomorrow I focus on one thing. I dont know what yet but tonight i write... Thanks for reading all this and good day. Sincerely, Jerry

That alone in itself has been my verse my rock to whenever im low or down or giving up. I have always been a boy, yes a boy, who sought validation from others. My dad wasn't around as a kid and because of that my mom wasn't either cause she had to work three maybe four jobs to raise us sons. Life wasn't easy lots of transferring schools and my brothers well they made friends fairly easier then i could. So as you can imagine i was always alone majority of my childhood. Even to this day i envy those who have childhood or elementary best friends that they still keep in touch with. I mean i dont even have that i never did. I wanted to be picked at least once when we did kick ball. I remember sooo many times where i would just walk off thinking "why me?" Growing up i tried my best to make people laugh i was always that overly energetic kid trying to ask curious questions. I remember one time i told my mom "my dad fired us" when they were going through a divorce and that made her laugh so hard she still tells that story to this day. Heck i still remember a lot of lonely stories. Fast forward to my high-school days, my older brothers went off to military with their high-school friends and my other brother would go out with his highschool buddies. Why my mom would go out with her sister. Heck i was always home a lot and i still am majority of the time. I did pretty well learning to accept being alone. That was until girls came into the picture. I felt love i felt wanted like someone appreciated my time and i could make someone laugh again. But somewhere that thought came up when their parents didnt approve or their siblings disliked me. Our they wanted to spent all their time with their friends over me. I thought again "why me?" What did i do so wrong to have upset you? I always tried and now im here again tonight thinking that same question. All my life i have learned to live alone to do things on my own to try my best to make people laugh and happy and in the end they always left me alone. The righteous shall live by faith. God never wanted distractions in my life. He never left me to be alone. The nights i cried to sleep. The many times i prayed for a friend at school. The many tears i cried thinking what he had that she wanted him. God had plans for me through my struggles and as little or large they may seem. The idea of being alone has always allowed me to fall short of God's grace simply because i wanted the emptiness filled with people around me. But God flooded those people out to make room for Himself. He wanted me to make Him laugh. He wanted to seek my approval and tonight i learn that. Because someone you love doesnt love you then maybe you need to direct all that effort you have been trying to send to them to Him. Stop looking for approval from others and be alone do things alone and find yourself. The righteous shall live by faith and that alone means you have to have faith before you go and join a church or a organization group or make friends or tell your family. Faith in Him that He helps you through the lonely times. Be righteous jerry because you keep trying to prove people wrong but thats not working. Prove to Him and then you can be happy again. You have always had your faith and thats something people cant take from you something you cant lose thats something that even when alone you have alone. Love- Jerry

Dave #DearJerry #Rehearsals