was this what people meant by butter melting?
It is time for an introduction to DD6. How nice it feels to discuss someone different (and, I’ll insert a brief reminder that “DD5″ was allocated to WCBBF’s friend with whom I hung out in LA). Letters on dating adventures are perhaps not so fun when you just end up discussing the same boy over and over and over and over again.
There is not so much to update, but I will give you what I’ve got.
Saturday afternoon we met up for coffee in my neighborhood. He beat me there and he waited for me outside in the rain (charming). He was very cute. Incredibly cute. A, I had no idea this level of cuteness was available to me. What a gift! And he was dressed impeccably in greyscale attire so that we would look quite good walking down the street together.
We grabbed coffee and stood at a ledge chatting for an hour and a half. He told me toward the end of our date, after asking if I had any dating horror stories (I don’t!), that he has a rule of doing coffee dates first so that he doesn’t find himself stuck at an entire dinner with someone with whom he is not compatible.
Sidenote on that: everyone I’ve gone on dates with has “rules” of some sort. And I get them, to an extent. I, however, have no rules because I have no experience and rules seem stupid. But what happens when two people with two separate sets of rules go on a date? Isn’t it very possible that people might be compatible or have a good time but their weirdo rules just get in the way of everything?
So we drink coffee and rapid-fire chat and it’s great. He asks a lot of questions about school and we end up down a sociology rabbit hole which I found unbelievable. I mentioned to him that I had two copies of The Fire Next Time on my book shelf (the last book he told me he read when we were texting last week). And he said he was getting ready to start a book for the second time that he hadn’t finished and that I was probably going to be disappointed he hadn’t read it yet. That book? Simone de Beauvoir’s The Second Sex. Let me just say I have never expected any man/non-academic to have read that book, but I clearly need to up my standards based on DD6′s thoughts. He had real opinions on the difference between Satre and de Beauvoir (“I just think she’s a much better thinker and Satre stole a lot of her ideas. If she was around now, I bet she’d have a #MeToo tweet”). 😮 And I told him I had visited both of their graves this summer. Because this, A, is S-style romance. French philosophers and gravesites.
I jokingly asked him if he’d come over earlier and rifled through my bookshelf before our date. I told him that I had just read Woolf’s A Room of One’s Own for the first time and was crazy about it. I told him the premise and he had a lot of questions. And then, because we were really on a role, I told him I had also just read Cixous for the first time and could barely contain my excitement the day we discussed it in class. And this dude was all in for it. We did not entirely agree about de Beauvoir’s thoughts and at one point he said, “I’m always up for being corrected or challenged. And you seem like you’re doing it respectfully so I don’t mind this at all”. Which is, like, a totally ‘duh’ thing to say. But was felt like this excellent welcome mat into a conversation that I’m used to having by just having men shout over me.
He also told me that when he was younger he worked as a go-go dancer so I’m pretty sure he’s the most well-rounded date I’ve met yet.
I was having a great time and wanted to keep the conversation going so I was very close to asking him if he wanted to go get tacos, until he told me he had to leave in a few to meet a friend for the movies. So, we wrapped up our conversation and went our separate ways. About an hour later we swapped some texts that we had a great time and I will be expecting to hear from him later in the week to set up date number two.
I’m kind of into the level of “feelings” I am currently having for DD6. I felt like we could have hung out talking all day. I felt like I was not far off from telling him about OH (and I will definitely not be waiting as long to tell people as I did with DD4). I was very attracted to DD6 and I found myself giving him a few full-body scans while we stood next to each other. But there were no crazy vibes. He was not attempting to charm me in any capacity. And while being charmed might have been nice, this maybe feels a little bit more genuine. Or, at least, it doesn’t feel like there is some weird trickery up his sleeve. It feels like we will go on multiple dates and figure out if we like each other. It feels very nice to be excited about more dates with someone, while not feeling like my heart is already thudding out of my chest for them.
A, I have been texting you a lot about my current obsession with Call Me By Your Name. I started the book Saturday morning before heading out for coffee. I am halfway through and will finish it before the movie comes out Friday. I will write more once I finish it and digest it, but it is making my heart swell bigger than anything has in a long while. I have highlighted probably 20% of the book and I’ve found myself so taken with the writing that I’m reading much of it out loud to slow it down and hear the words spoken. We will discuss this more later, but for now please start reading it so that we can react to it side-by-side.
