#date everthing

Dearest Hearts,

—

By the time you read this letter, I would have already left this world.

It’s not something that you nor I could control, it is something that I've deliberately hid from you, and I would have said I’m sorry, but that too would be a lie.

The silence that left after are deafening, their faces contort to disbelief, or some, grief.

“No, no way right? this gotta be a joke,” Cam broke the silence, even his usual indifferent attitude tensed.

“Yeah! this has to be a joke how can…how can they- ,” Skylar speaks out, reasoning to herself but it cuts off quickly by her tears.

A few dateables only averted their gaze, others cried, some seemingly to plot something by the look of their face. It is interesting how grief can change people in so little time, such as ‘death’ is a small word for a big thing.

They feel, even if the letter contained thousands of words, it won’t be quite enough, even if it's 100 or more letters personally delivered to them each, it won't be enough. you are cruel, very much so, you left them with a house to their name, a letter containing sweet nothings, and a corpse to carry for the rest of their life.

That day, a hundred and more people died, but only one stopped breathing.

I’m sorry, that I’ll not see you happy.

—

No, I’m not sorry for letting you live a life. But I am sorry I could not see the life you’ve made for yourself.

But if there’s ever one thing you doubt of me, don’t let it be whether I love you or not.

—

after the long silence, comes the arguments, such is the folly of being human. Blaming each other, arguing with each other, maybe this is some way to keep them from going insane, it was explosive, equally as deafening as the silence that comes before it.

Skylar doesn’t even have enough energy to help de-escalate the situation, her eyes stinged of tears, her body limp, she wants to bury herself to the ground, maybe meeting you on the other side is a great idea.

‘this has to be a joke, right?’ she thinks, her hands gripping the carpet below, turning her knuckles white.

Denial.

‘Why did they left us just like that?! after all that we went through!’

Anger.

‘if i can turn back time-’

Bargaining.

‘What if I just die too, with them?’

Depression.

her thoughts raced a thousand miles a second, of course she did not overcome your death this fast, no one does. Her perception of being human is her only idea of how to handle grief, it left a sour taste in her mouth, like a yellow stain in a white sheet, like a scar that did not quite heal.

If pain comes in the wake of love, if all admiration, affection, devotion only led to a burial ground, if all moments they spent with you is now a memory laced with the sweetest dream, helping them to deny the bitter truth of the life you lost, is it worth it to love at all?, yes, her fingers dig the carpet, testimony for how she truly felt, yes, said the tears that stained her cheek, like a gentle kiss that came from you, yes, it would.

She stood up with all her strength, looking at the others that argued, others that cried, others that were just silent. Those who argued are among the hot-heads of them Stefan, Jean loo, Harper, Dirk, even Dishy in some capacity, among them, Celia, Florence and Dorian tried to de-escalate the situation.

Skylar walks up to Celia, putting her hand on her shoulder to get her attention, Skylar then shakes her head telling her to step aside.

“Stop pretending to be so righteous,” Skylar’s voice is hushed, like a whisper, “Neither you nor I, we don’t deserve saving,” despite the hushed tone, her voice felt the loudest, effectively shutting up the argument.

“We left them when they needed us most, we left them to rot,” Her voice wavered slightly, “maybe we’re just not as desperate for them after all,” their breath hitched, because they knew that might be true, because they knew they threw away your love.

so continue to forgive yourself, over and over endlessly, until you are sick of it, because everything begins from there.

Maybe, just maybe, when the scars felt too old and the silence of your home felt too cold, maybe they will forgive themself, and maybe they will forgive your love and all its cruelty.

—

—

Run along, and find a way to cope with your grief. Run along, and maybe, one day, when they take out the letter that was lying inside the fold of the clothes that is made from the threads of fate, welcoming them home instead of a kiss and a smile that will hold them close in the dead of night, it wouldn't feel so bitter.

and grief is a grave you visit, when the silence is far too full.

and they wouldn't be so selfish.

But love is selfish, and love is cruel.

—

Everyone, live with love, because life will love you like I do.

—

Yours forever and beyond,

Your Homeowner

Dearest Hearts,

When I first stepped foot in this house, when I uprooted my life to move to somewhere to start anew, it was lonely, after all I live alone. My past traumas, which I rather leave behind, had scarred me, but I choose to move forward, I choose to not let my past define who I am.

By the time you read this letter, I would have already left this world.

It’s not something that you nor I could control, it is something that I've deliberately hid from you, and I would have said I’m sorry, but that too would be a lie.

That's what I thought, but really, I am a coward, I choose to isolate myself from the outside world, I choose to be alone. I never healed, and when the doctors read out my diagnosis I thought I was done, I thought my life was worthless, no company wanted to hire me, my friends dwindled, and I chose to rot away.

but you all, you’re always there in my happiest and my darkest time, you are there unwavering, you stayed the same, small comforts like the warmth of the fireplace, the softness of my couch and my bed, the sunlight that peered through my window to greet me in the morning, the mirror that make me look back to who i am, the food that i ate in the middle of the night, that what keep me alive. I took you all for granted, I didn’t realize you all have sacrificed so much for me, for me who didn’t even look at you when I walked past you, for me who is imperfect, for me who is sick

and then, skylar came into my life, she made me see a whole new world, of different people that has accompanied me since the start, of you.

you and your lovable personalities, your dream, your aspirations, it gave me hope, although I knew that the person who gave me that chance only used me for his convenience, i never regretted any part of it, because i get to meet you all, it is the greatest gift that i have ever received.

but i knew, to love is to bring with it pain. My time is limited, the disease sucks out my life like a parasite, and I don't know what I must do. Your presence, your stories are my only salvation from my pain and I don't want to lose it.

But I also don’t want you to see me at my worst.

No, I’m not sorry for letting you live a life. But I am sorry I could not see the life you’ve made for yourself.

When Skylar told me about realization, it was a breakthrough. I can finally repay you all for the things you’ve done for me, you can realize your dream and be alive, to be meat and bone, be human.

so, like the coward that i am, i hid it from you, i concealed my pain with a smile, and hide behind this letter for my final words to you, and i’m sorry

I’m sorry that I’ll not see you happy.

But if there’s ever one thing you doubt of me, don’t let it be whether I love you or not.

because i love you, whether it's in the form of romantic love or platonic love, i love you, with all the pain that comes with it, i love you, because you are made to love, i love you because i am capable of it. I love you, because I only have that to offer at the end of my life.

may life be kind to all of you, and I pray for your happiness in every universe, in every ending, in every road that you take.

so, continue to forgive yourself, over and over endlessly, until you are sick of it, because everything begins from there

Everyone, live with love, because life will love you like I do.

tag list ! : @punchratt @eclecticfirewitch @rosalynx03 @dyike @airyravenmaid

Yours forever and beyond,

"Oh, but I disagree." Ignoring his words, acknowledging that Volt still hadn't tapped out. Despite how Eddie turned up the setting, clicking it to the next number on the dial. An multitude of zaps then directed into Volt's body. "Can handle it…especially with your origins." Volt's chest flushed a bright, rosy pink. Aware he was being toyed with…that he was at his maker's mercy.

Increasing the wattage once more was all it took to push Volt over the edge. Seeing a pure, white light as his eyes rolled back into his head. Lips falling open into an o-shaped silent scream. Eddie sucked a few purple bruises along Volt's neck, a semi-lasting reminder of the events that had occurred in their Breaker Box after hours, without patrons. "My ravishing creation."