I am grateful to do hard things because it’s for the betterment of me… that morning class…
I am excited for my afternoon class :D each time I have it :D it’s special to look forward to something good and constant each week, something that’s there despite the horrors and negative feelings
I think I adore certain people who I meet, so much (self note: N, such a kind soul who deserves so much self compassion), and there are so many people who know things I don’t know who have beautiful hearts and interesting minds and I’ll get the privilege of meeting some them — the world will keep opening up —
And I carry a lot of stress, grief, and there are environmental factors that I didn’t choose — things that aren’t my fault, but mine to heal from — struggles that are objectively extremely hard and sometimes debilitating
But there can also be joy in the day, throughout the day. There is also growth that happens in the moment-to-moment, in the present.
Being human is complex, difficult, and we won’t ever stop suffering or feeling anxious until we’re dead — but god — we are alive, too. We get to experience the good, the bad, the ugly— but there is good. We can adjust how we do things and change our realities, with the right people & tools/resources. We can feel warmth and love and I don’t ever want that to be something I take for granted— because it’s special, and it’s beautiful.
There’s always hope. Because I can make change. Because I can feel grateful. Because other people exist. Because I exist.
