Craving Acceptance
I want someone to love me for me
Iām exhausted of being rejected for something I canāt control
why do I even keep trying?
why canāt I be accepted?
although, I canāt blame them
for, I havenāt accepted myself yet
how could I?
how do I accept my body betraying me
i fucking canāt
16 fucking years
and Iām just living with my retarded body
itās not orthodox
I know other people whoāve had no problem accepting this horror
why the fuck is it so hard for me?
I guess, Iām only a bothersome burden
in all reality, Iām not worth loving
people say "youāre supposed to love yourself first"
but how do I love something I hate?
with a lump in my throat, I fucking ask you how?
a helpless, gross, futile thing deserves only neglect
as much as it burns my chest
yet, my goddamn heart believes otherwise
the war between my heart and brain is a real issue
i wish my heart would be cut out
it brings a sting I just want to throw up
i donāt know how to get rid of this pique
I tried numbing the cramps in my heart but it doesnāt last
it hurts too redundantly
i merely crave the acceptance I canāt give myself











