#cumulative effect

“Take care, then, how you hear. To the one who has, more will be given, and from the one who has not, even what he thinks he has will be taken away.”

In a Gospel that says a lot of odd-sounding things, this is one of the oddest-sounding. At least to our ears.

But this is not some cryptic piece of vague nonsense designed to sound deep.

It’s actually very practical. And it has to do with how you and I work as human beings.

As St. Ephrem tells us, the key to understanding what Jesus is saying is that this is all one thought, and that “This is like ‘let the one who has ears listen.’”

That is, what we hear, what we take in matters. Why?

What we hear, what we take in is cumulative. It adds up within us. Whatever it is, whether good or bad, it will add to the pile of that same thing that is already within us.

If we’re hearing things that make us afraid? That will add to the pile of things within us that we’re afraid of.

If we’re taking in things that make us angry? That will add to the pile of things within us that we’re angry about.

That is what “To the one who has, more will be given” is all about. The things we take in add up. But that’s not the whole story.

Like St. Ephrem said, this is all one thought. “To the one who has, more will be given,” cannot be separated from “and from the one who has not, even what he thinks he has will be taken away.” Which means what?

It means that when you and I are adding to one pile of things within us, the other stuff within us doesn’t just sit there. It starts to fade away.

Because the stuff within us (whether it’s our emotions, our spiritual well-being, our knowledge, whatever) is not static. It’s either growing or it’s fading.

And you and I have only so much bandwith, we only have so many spoons. We can only grow one thing at a time. Whatever we’re not growing? It’s going to be fading.

If you’ve ever wondered why getting a puppy and all the time that that a new puppy takes (both the fun stuff and the needful things like training and housebreaking) helps you deal with your grief over the death of your old dog? This is why.

So, if we’re hearing the word of God? That will add to the pile of things within us that bring us peace and strength. And the things within us that don’t bring us peace and strength will start to fade.

If we’re taking in the good things of God? That will add to the pile of things within us that we’re joyful about. And the things within us that we’re not joyful about will fade.

But it all turns on what we’re hearing, on what we’re taking in. Because that is what will be adding up within us.

Which is why Jesus is telling us – “Take care, then, how you hear.”

“Overnight success takes about 10 years.”

That’s the Jeff Bezos version. It’s been said different ways by different people. Whoever said it first, it’s true.

But it’s not just true for companies or products or careers.

It’s true for just about every aspect of our lives. Including who we are.

This is what Jesus is talking about in today’s Gospel. About the importance, about the power of “the smallest letter or the smallest part of a letter.” This is the “why” behind that teaching.

Because nothing worth having in life is the work of a moment. The things that matter are like a mosaic. Built out of thousands of tiny pieces, put together over months and years.

It all adds up.

And that’s true for us as well. You and I are the cumulative product of everything that we have said and done, everything that we have experienced, and everything that we think and feel about all of that.

And it all keeps adding up. We can’t stop it. This effect is always at work in our lives. Molding us, shaping us, changing us – whether we want it to or not.

Your relationship with God? Your ability to love? Who you are when it counts? How you handle the hard things in life? Whether you become who God made you to be?

This where all of it comes from.

The thing is, while you and I are going to shaped by this, we do have a choice. We can just let it happen to us. And end up…wherever. Because we let ourselves be shaped by…whatever.

Or we can choose.

We can be intentional about what we say and do. We can be intentional about what we think and feel.

Not just in the big moments, but (more importantly) in the small, seemingly insignificant ones. Because those are the moments that – taken together – will determine who we are. Both in this life and in eternity.

“Sow a thought, reap an action.

Sow an action, reap a habit.

Sow a habit, reap a character.

Sow a character, reap a destiny.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Lose weight fast with this one weird trick.”

“The investment secret banks don’t want you to know.”

“Three things you should always take to a restaurant (number 2 will shock you).”

There’s something about us that loves the quick fix. The simple solution to the complex problem. The one thing…that changes everything.

It’s why we fall for clickbait online. Every. Time. Even when we know it’s clickbait.

Why? Because we want it to be true. Not any particular “secret” or “weird trick” in an online ad. But we want the idea behind it to be true.

Deep down, you and I desperately want simple solutions to life’s complex problems. This is what clickbait is tapping into.

The thing is, almost nothing in life works that way. Just about everything in life is cumulative. That is, both the problems we face and the solutions to those problems – are made up of the cumulative total of a lot of different stuff.

There’s more to a healthy relationship than remembering birthdays and anniversaries. Not that you shouldn’t try to remember them.

But that’s only one piece of the puzzle. There’s more to it than that.

There’s more to a healthy relationship than trying to see things from the other person’s perspective. Not that you shouldn’t try. On a regular basis.

But that’s only one piece of the puzzle. There’s more to it than that.

Both are good ideas. Neither one by itself will do the job. No matter how well we do it.

This tendency in us? This desire in us try to solve complex problems by doing only one good thing? That’s exactly what Jesus is pushing back against in today’s Gospel when He says,

“Woe to you, Pharisees! You pay tithes of mint and of rue and of every garden herb, but you pay no attention to judgment and to love for God. These you should have done, without overlooking the others.”

Jesus isn’t dismissing what may seem like small, maybe even silly, outer signs of faith.

Jesus is dismissing doing only the small, outer signs of faith – to the neglect of our interior life.

Jesus is telling us to do the small, outer signs of faith. The Rosary. Prayer during the day. Starting the day with gratitude to God.

Because they create habits that will open our hearts to God and God’s love. Even when our interior lives are a hot mess.

Jesus is telling us to exercise judgment. To think before we act or speak. To be aware of the effect of what we do and say on ourselves. And on others.

Because exercising judgment will call us back to God. And will keep us from hurting others. And ourselves.

Jesus is telling us to love God. To let our hearts – and our lives – be filled with God’s love.

Because God’s love cannot be contained. It will spill over into every area of our lives. And it will move us to make a difference in the lives of others.

All of that together? Done over the course of a lifetime?

It’s nothing less than the sure and certain road to God, the path to becoming a saint.

(by request, my homily from Sunday)

I’d like to talk with you today about getting what you pay for.

Think about the last time you went to the drive through. You put your order in. They told you how much it was, so you drove around to the window.

When you got there, you paid for it. And then, they handed you…something else, something you didn’t order.

Now, you are the nicest person on God’s green earth. So you didn’t yell at the kid in the drive through window. You didn’t go all Karen on them, and have one of those “I demand to speak to the manager” moments.

But you could have. Because you’re upset. That’s not what you ordered. That is not what you paid for.

It’s a natural reaction. Even if we’re mature enough to handle it gracefully, we’re still upset.

It’s ours. We picked it out. We paid for it. And we want what we paid for.

Why? Why do we get so upset when we don’t get what we paid for? Because that’s how things are supposed to work in life. You pick something out, you pay for it, and that’s what you get.

It’s the natural order of things.

The thing is, it’s not just what’s supposed to happen. It’s what does happen. In every area of our lives.

Whether we realize it or not, every day you and I are picking out things and paying for them.

And you’re thinking, “sure, I go for lunch, I pick what I’m going to have, I pay for it, that’s what I get. I go to the store, I pick stuff out, I pay for it, that’s what I get. I go on Amazon, I pick stuff out, I pay for it, that’s what I get. What’s your point?”

All of that is true. But making your choice, paying for it, and then getting what you pay for –doesn’t stop there. Making your choice, paying for it, and then getting what you pay for extends to every part of our lives.

Let’s go back to today’s first reading for a moment. Where it says “Before man are life and death, good and evil, whichever he chooses shall be given him.”

The thing is, the principle that the first reading is talking about isn’t limited to just the big ticket stuff. High-drama things that grab our attention, because it’s obvious what’s really at stake. The kind of things that you and I will binge-watch shows about on Netflix.

Making your choice, paying for it, and then getting what you pay for is a principle that extends to every part of our lives.

And whether we mean to or not, you and I are always making choices. It’s something we literally cannot avoid doing. Here’s how it works.

Let’s say that when you took your current job, that job wasn’t your endgame. One of the reasons that you took the job was because of the career path that went with it. It’s the kind of job that has opportunities for growth and promotion. Both inside the company and with other employers in the industry.

You’ve been coming to work for almost 5 years now. You’re doing a decent job of it. No complaints on your evaluations. But time and again, you get passed over for promotion. Why?

Take a look at who is getting promoted. The people who are stepping up to do the special projects. The people who are doing more than they have to. They are the ones reaping the rewards.

Why? After all, you chose the same job. Why not you?

Because there’s a step two. It’s not enough to choose, that’s step one. If you want to reap the rewards, you have to pay. That’s step two.

The people who are getting promoted, they’re on step two. They’re paying. And they’re getting what they paid for.

If you’ve ever wondered why you’re at a point where a relationship seems stuck. Whether it’s a business relationship, your relationship with a friend or a family member, a romantic relationship. This is the first place to look for the solution.

Odds are, you’re not doing step two. You’re not paying.

But I must warn you. Making your choice, paying for it, and then getting what you pay for? It also works in the negative.

If you’ve got a friend that you never do anything with. That you never make time for.

And those few times when you do connect with them? You’re too busy telling them all about the things that you’re doing, that you’re interested in. If you never make time for the things that they’re doing, that they’re interested in.

Or worse, you do make time for the things that they’re doing and that they’re interested in. So that you can second-guess them. Or be critical of them. Maybe even make fun of them.

When they stop taking your calls. When they block your texts. When they unfriend you on social media. Don’t be surprised.

You made your choice, and you paid for it by what you did. You’re just getting what you paid for.

All of life works this way.

The reason that all of life works this way? Because the Source of all life works this way.

This is how God works? Yes. It’s what the first reading is talking about. It’s what Jesus is showing us in today’s Gospel. As Jesus says,

“Whoever obeys and teaches these commandments will be called greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”

If that’s your choice, and you pay for it - by doing it, then that’s what you get.

Again, Jesus says, “You have heard that it was said to your ancestors, ‘You shall not kill; and whoever kills will be liable to judgment.’ But I say to you, whoever is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment;”

If that’s your choice, and you pay for it - by doing it, then that’s what you get.

One of the most beautiful truths about God is, if we think about it, also one of the most terrifying.

That the One who made our free will respects our use of that free will. That God will not substitute His judgment for ours. And He will give us exactly what we pay for.

The other thing to know is that our choices, no matter how great or how trivial they may seem to us, our choices add up.

Sometimes they add up visibly. Mostly they add up more like the way that the ocean keeps washing in sand. Little by little. Unseen from day to day. Until one day we realize that there’s a beach where there was none before.

No matter how it happens, the cumulative effect of our choices is either leading us towards God. Or away from God.

And in the end, you and I will get exactly what we’ve paid for. There is no neutral option.

Today, take a look at what you’re getting. Out of every area of your life.

Take a look at the direction you’re headed.

If you’re not getting what you wanted. If that’s not the direction you want to go. Then maybe it’s time to be honest – about what you’re really paying for.

The sad history of leaded gasoline

On the frosty morning of Dec. 9, 1921, in Dayton, Ohio, researchers at a General Motors lab poured a new fuel blend into one of their test engines. Immediately, the engine began running more quietly and putting out more power. The new fuel was tetraethyl lead. With vast profits in sight—and very few public health regulations at the time—General Motors Co. rushed gasoline diluted with tetraethyl…

New Post has been published on https://www.crownofcompassion.org/2019/05/03/cumulative-effect/

The cumulative effect - one step at a time

“Keep taking one step at a time, and at the proper time you’ll discover a cumulative effect. . . .  Eventually the race we run is made up of tens of thousands of individual steps.  Each step,in the moment, may seem insignificant, but the cumulative effect of all the steps ultimately determines what race we ran.”- Kyle Idleman

“Let us not weary of doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”- Galatians 6:9 (NIV)

In Chapter 9 (“One Step at a Time”) of Don’t Give Up, Kyle Idleman stresses the need to focus on one step at a time.  For example, Pastor Idleman calculates, a marathon consists of 55,374 steps.  However, consider what Kyle’s marathon runner friend Wesley tells himself when he struggles to keep going: One step at a time.  Just take the next step.

Yet, Pastor Idleman notes, there’s a real reason many people give up on running the race.  That reason? – we underestimate the importance of taking one step at a time.  Therefore, we must focus on intentionally taking the next step.  And the next step after that.

But, as Kyle explains, we often believe that a big challenge requires a big solution:

“When what we’re up against what feels like a big challenge, there’s a tendency to think we need a big solution.  We’re looking for one big decision that can help us get out of a big dilemma.  In reality, the key to persevering is to focus on one step at a time.”

In conclusion, a cumulative effect happens little by little over time.  Not all at once.  As you faithfully take one step at a time, eventually you’ll reap a harvest.

Today’s question: When have you experienced the cumulative effect of many little steps?  Please share.

Take advantage of the cumulative effect of The Hyperbolic Stretching Program!