#crushathome

I am now a Crush 60 Team Crush affiliate! I am so excited to share this with you and incredibly honored to be a part of a fitness company that I love dearly! I am an OG follower of Crush 60, before they had all of their workout programs, before the interactive videos, before the supplements, when it was just two workout programs and a handful of t-shirts. I'm so proud of their expansion as a company and know that there is even more greatness to come. I am currently completing Crush at Home, then I will compete Crush 60, and then Booty Bootcamp. I have taken my before photos and can't wait to show you the progress I have gotten from just Crush at Home alone. After completing these three programs I can't even imagine how fit my body will be! I also take both Go! BCAAs and YOLO Pre-workout and love them both. My preferred flavors are tropical punch and lemonberry but if you love orange creamsicle flavors you will die for citrus sunrise. My affiliate link: 👇 here 15% off discount code: WONDERWOMAN Keep Crushing!!

I've reached Day 6! Growing my butt so I don’t just look like a square slight spongy pole is one of my goals and now my ass is dead 😝

I took an unexpected active rest day today. I just couldn't make myself go to the gym (and I forgot a shirt for the gym as well). My stomach was all over the place today and my brain just feels fuzzy and headache-y so I decided to just take my walk home in the cold as my workout for the day. I might add in some yoga this evening but maybe not. I'm going to make sure that I don't let this unscheduled break make me give up, which is often what happens to me.

Day 5 of Crush at Home. After having a bad day and some more disappointment today (scholarship stuff - I can't get a hold of someone who had to resend their letter because the first one wasn't good enough) I really just wanted to give up and then go to bed at like 1pm. But I refused to let my feelings get me down. So I made my butt get to the gym! I'm not sure if I feel better because I went to the gym but I suppose it's good that I did it. I've been doing more research and it seems like PCOS is an illness that has a high comorbidity rate with MCAS which I already have. So it's not that surprising that I have both. And both have weight issues in common - so yay! Not. I'm going to a movie with some people from school this evening so hopefully that will help turn my day around a little. I hate being in an emotional funk like this but I figure as long as I don't completely give up on things I'm doing alright.

Early afternoon workout today - completed day 4 of Crush at Home. It's the first day I would qualify as cold (-1 Celsius during the day) and I'm just not feeling great so I decided to do my workout right after class. Now I'm heading home to have a nice hot shower in the hopes that it will make me feel a little better and I'll be able to get some work done. I think that's my favourite part of being a grad student where I'm at - I have an office space that's mine and that I can work at but I also have the ability to work from home most days if I'd like to and with my current headache I choose home today. Today's workout was tough and I had to modify somethings but I'm trying to tell myself (everyday) that I may not be able to do everything but the effort I put in is important. I won't let my illness define me but I also need to learn to give my self credit when I'm not 100%.

Day 3 of Crush at Home complete!!! Today was an active test day which called for steady state cardio for about 30 mins. It was a nice relaxing thing to do but it still felt good to move a little. I'm proud of myself for actually treating this day like an active rest day rather than pushing myself too hard which is a recipe for burnout. I've done that way too many times. I also went to get my blood tests done today. I'm oddly proud of the fact that I'm now really good at blood tests. I used to faint at the end of a blood test and hated them. Now they're an annoyance of course (because I could be using my time better) but I'm totally fine with them. I even watched her stick the needle in this time without queasiness. I'm not sure what I'm hoping for with the blood tests. I feel kind of like a terrible person because I'm kind of hoping that the tests come back with something specific. It's not that I want to be sick or diagnosed with another illness but I think it's more that I want some answers. I'm sick and tired (lol pun intended) of being 'sick' but being told that it's idiopathic or might be something that we can't test for in Canada. I guess I just feel really conflicted - I want a reason as to why I'm losing so much hair and can't seem to get any weight off no matter how I change my diet or exercise. Now just to wait nervously until the results are in.

Day 2 of Crush at Home complete. I can't straighten my arms after yesterday so today was pretty tough but I just worked hard an modified what I needed to modify (ex instead of burpees I did sets of jumping jacks and push-ups). I also went to the doctor today and I've been sent for blood tests as they think I may have PCOS or Hypothyroidism. I'm not pleased but at least I seem to have a doctor who treats my symptoms as something to be concerned with rather than just something that I need to exercise away.

365 calories seems pretty great (although my workout was a little longer because I forgot to start my workout for the first 10 mins or so). Now to keep up the hard work, one day at a time.