#corporal ford

How the hell he made it out, why the hell he made it out. He wasn’t sure of the answer to either question. The memory of that hook sinking into his flesh, the way his ribs gave under the hard metal intrusion, the blood that poured down onto his boots. All of it was the only palpable memories he had. After that it was blurs at times, broken pieces of a puzzle that Boyce had tried his best to help him put back together in the few days after the allies took Ciel Blanc before he was loaded onto a truck and shipped off to a hospital in Germany.

His list of injuries had ranged from the gaping maul in his chest to most of his ribs being broken all the way down to a concussion and the ankle that Boyce and Chloe had reset earlier that very night. The serum he’d used, that syringe that had been the only way he could think of staying alive long enough to not let that evil bastard win, hadn’t been the full strength. 

When he made the decision to stay, he’d thought of Chase. What that shit had turned the camera loving young soldier into. He wouldn’t be that. Boyce was a voice of reason. “Chase was already gone, Ford. You weren’t dead yet. Come on, we can fix it. We can deal with it. You’ve just got to get up. You got to get out” 

The only reason he finally hauled himself up to unlock that damn gate was because Boyce was as stubborn as his older brother had once been and all Lewis could see was the friend he’d lost back in Italy cursing at him to not give up fighting then, to not abandon his little brother. 

They barely made it out the tunnels before they collapsed, taking that damn tower down with them. The walk back into town had been the roughest mile Lewis had ever made. His body was trying to give out on him. When he collapsed just shy of the house Chloe, Tibbet and Rosenfield had taken refuge in, Boyce ran ahead for help. He woke up two days later in a med tent, hoping like hell he wasn’t about to be a science experiment. 

The only saving grace was the fever that ravaged his body had burned the serum out of his system. The infection from the hook would’ve killed him alone had it not had that serum to attack. He was left very human, in a hospital for months, waking up every day and wondering just if he was going to make it home and why him if he did when so many other men that had lives waiting for them hadn’t.

By the time Lewis made it stateside, his squad was also making it home or the squad he’d last been with. Tibbet, Boyce and Rosenfield. Some bonds were forged in fire and that was the bond between the four of them. 

Lewis knew going home or his parents home wasn’t in the books. He had some money saved, he just needed a place to when Tibbet told him his uncle had a few rentals he took him up on it, found a job and started working. He told himself he was adjusting back to life. He knew it was a lie. 

He dodged the mirror in his bathroom when he stepped out of the shower, tried not to look down at his chest any more than necessary so he wouldn’t have to see the mass of scarred tissue left behind. He would talk to Boyce or Rosenfield if they called but always cut the call short and never took them up on their offer to get together.  He cut himself off from society in general. 

Noises, ones that never would’ve made him flinch in the midst of battle had him jolting like a physical blow.  He couldn’t even go to the damn butchers’ because he tried once, needed to just pick up some meat. The door to the back of the place had swung open and he caught a glimpse of the hooks dangling in the back and barely made it to the sidewalk before emptying his stomach. Sleep was damn near non-existent and when it did come nightmares were prevalent. It was like he was in a fog, half the time he wasn’t even sure if he’d actually died in that hell and this was some sort of weird afterlife.

The grocery store. Lewis despised it, hated crowds but it was a necessary evil. He had to eat. He stood on the aisle with flour and sweeteners, staring but not really seeing anything in front of him. The previous night had been rough, the pipes had acted up, clanging a bit and the sound had made certain he hadn’t been able to find any sleep. 

He wasn’t sure how long he’d been standing, how far out of it he looked to anyone around him when he heard a soft voice say “Excuse me?” he scrubbed a hand down his face, scratching at the scruff covering his jaw before turning to see what had to be the prettiest woman he’d ever laid eyes on staring at him worriedly. “Are you ok?” you  asked gently and he scoffed, not meaning to sound rude but knowing he probably did when he said “I’m not too sure honestly”

You took a step closer and extended your hand before telling him your name. He slipped his hand into yours, admiring how soft your hand felt against his. You smiled brightly “Well Lewis, do you need any help? You looked like the flour offended you a bit” he shook his head “No, I think I got it”

You knew you should probably walk away, give him some space but he looked so lost it made your heart ache. Not to mention you noticed the chain around his neck, too many males in your family had come home with that look and that chain. You couldn’t leave Lewis alone if there was any way you could help, even just with something as simple as keeping him company while grocery shopping.

Lewis turned back to the flour, trying to actually look at them this time instead of through them when he heard you call his name lightly so he looked back at you “Yes ma’am?” the light flush that graced your face was the best thing he’d seen in years. “Is there any chance you’d mind walking around with me for a bit? The stock boy here is such a sweet kid but he’s so tall and doesn’t consider that not all of us can reach the top shelf”

For the first time in longer than he’d care to think about, a genuine smile tugged at his lips “I’ve got no where to be that’s too important and I’d hate for you to hurt yourself climbing up the shelves” you smiled again and walked back over with your cart, crossing your arms as you stared at the flour with him “Ok, lets work on both of our lists and we’ll be out of here in no time”

Lewis cut his eyes at you and found himself hoping it took just a little longer to find what was on both of your lists just so he could spend a little more time at your side.

The grocery store became a bit of a staple in Lewis’ schedule. It meant he got to see you. The woman he had no business looking forward to seeing because if you knew half of the things he’d done, the things he’d seen you’d go running in the other direction.

He walked next to you in the grocery store, trying to ignore the slight tremor in his hand. He’d had a bad few days. Too many thoughts running away, too many what ifs, too many flashbacks. He was just about to apologize and tell you he’d have to leave when you silently reached out and slipped your hand into his, a grounding force to let him know he was still alive, he was safe. He made it back stateside.

You laid your intertwined fingers on the handle of the cart, continuing talking about the lists for both of your places as you walked alone, like you hadn’t just tilted his entire world on its axis with that small simple gesture.

“Can I buy you a coffee or something some time?” he asked softly and you stopped in your tracks, the biggest smile he’d ever seen gracing your face “I’d love that! Before we leave here we really need to get each other’s phone numbers too”

The feeling of the hook sinking into his skin, his ribs caving under the gashing pressure, the blood pooling on his boots and the sickening laughter that rang through his ears at the fact that he’d soon die.

Lewis sat up, the blanket sliding off the bed. He was washed down in sweat, his hair sticking to his damp forehead and he was shivering despite the heat in his place. “Fuck” he growled, angry at himself for it happening again, at the damn doctors for telling him the meds would help with sleep, angry at everything. 

He swung his legs around, sitting on the side of the bed, trying to get his breathing back to normal. His thoughts kept circling around to you. You told him to call any time, said it was just you in your place. He glanced at the time and saw it was just after midnight. Did you really mean anytime? You could always hang up on him?

He stood up, swaying just a bit before walking into his living room. The couch sat in the middle of the room, the phone on the side table so it could reach the jack. He’d just recently gotten that line so his ma and the squad could call him. He sat down heavily on the couch, his body feeling like it was weighed down but memories. He tried to talk himself out of calling you but the next thing he knew the phone was in his hand and your line was ringing in his ear.

The first ring of the phone you were fairly certain you were dreaming then it rang again and you realized that was your actual phone. You nearly fell out of the bed scrambling to get from your bedroom to the small living room where your phone was. You plucked it up, laying across the couch before answering with a sleepy “Hello?”

“Hey honey, I’m so sorry about calling this late” you sat up a bit straighter at hearing Lewis’ voice. “It’s fine Lewis. Bad night?” his chuckle was the only answer you needed. You rolled your bottom lip between your teeth, knowing he wouldn’t want to talk so you offered “Wanna hear about my niece and her pet chickens?” he huffed out a laugh “Sounds like one helluva story” “Oh it is Mr Ford. Get comfy and be prepared to be entertained”

Lewis felt so guilty about waking you up but the more you talked about your niece, your life, the slower his heartbeat and breathing got. The more relaxed he felt just hearing your voice. He shifted to lay across his couch, keeping the phone near his ear, replying at the small breaks he knew you wanted proof he was still awake.

You could hear Lewis’ breathing leveling out slowly, knew he was calmer but you kept talking until a soft snore graced your ears. He’d fallen asleep. You considered hanging up but you didn’t want him to wake up and be alone so you laid across your couch, tugging the base of the phone closer so you could lay the receiver near your ear before laying down yourself. You whispered a soft “Night Lewis” before closing your eyes.

Lewis woke up slowly, stretching the kink out in his neck before reaching for the phone receiver where it lay next to him. He figured you hung up but instead of dead air, he heard soft breathing. You were asleep. You’d stayed on the phone with him all night to offer comfort. What the hell did he have to offer you?

He considered if he should just hang up or wake you. He called your name softly and you yawned before saying “Morning” over the line. He couldn’t help but imagine your bedhair and sleepy smile. “How’d you sleep honey?” he asked and you laughed “Good. You?” he thought about it and had to admit “Better than I have in a while” you breathed out another small laugh “Good, I’m always here for you Lewis”

“So, is this a date?” you were sitting across from Lewis, both of you sipping coffee after another grocery store day. He lifted an eyebrow “Huh?” you shrugged, “Is this a date? I mean, we go grocery shopping together every week, talk on the phone a lot and spend a lot of time together. Are we dating?” 

You looked so confused Lewis couldn’t help but laugh. You were adorable in the most attractive way “Do you want to be dating me?” he asked and you ducked your eyes before murmuring “Yes? I mean if you’d like to be dating me that is”

“One condition, I start taking you to real places too. Not just coffee or grocery shopping” he offered and you nodded “Ok” he grinned, “That mean I get to kiss you?” you stood up and leaned across the table to press a soft kiss to his lips then sat back down. He blinked a few times, a bit stunned before laughing “You’re something else sweetheart” 

You and Lewis had been officially dating for a while. You’d stayed at his place a time or two after he mentioned how well he slept just being on the phone with you and you teased in passing about the fact that he’d probably sleep even better with you in the bed. The first time he’d had a rough night with you there he’d been so worried that you would leave, realize he wasn’t worth the effort, instead you’d whispered “You’re home, you’re safe” while you ran your fingers through his sweat soaked hair, helping him to slowly come back to his body.

He was falling more in love with you every moment that passed. Every day at your side, in your life felt like he was relearning how to live, not just simply exist. 

Lewis walked into his place with his arms around you, lips teasing at your neck. The two of you had gone out to a restaurant Tibbet’s aunt’s friend had opened. It was nice, Lewis couldn’t even remember what he’d eaten because his full attention was on you the entire night. You were so beautiful, so radiant and sweet. 

When his lips barely grazed your pulse and a soft moan escaped your lips he groaned low. He needed to hear more of that. “Ready to go to bed?” he whispered against the shell of your ear and you glanced up at him, the question plain in your eyes before you nodded “Yeah”

__________________________

Breathy moans, the sound of kisses barely meeting and light whimpers filled the room. Lewis barely had you stripped and you already sounded so damn pretty. Your lips were on his pulse but when you reached for the hem of his shirt his hands flew out to cover yours. You froze, wide eyed, staring up at him “I’m sorry”

“No honey, just” he took a deep breath, kissing you again before muttering that he wanted to leave the shirt on. You nodded, a light offer of “We don’t have to have sex Lewis. I’m happy just kissing you and being in your arms” you were already bare under him, he’d already gotten a taste of your skin under him, a tease of your sounds. He shook his head, the corners of his lips ticking upwards in a hint of a smirk “God no, I want you so bad it hurts sweetheart. It’s just..” you cut him off by tugging him down to you, your lips met his and you whispered “You don’t have to explain, just kiss me”

__________________________

Lewis hesitated before pushing into you, holding your eyes as he did and christ even wearing a condom, you felt heavenly, wrapped around him like pure velvet. The way your head fell back, the soft gasp leaving you and how your face scrunched up because you were trying to hold his gaze was the prettiest thing he’d ever seen. He felt a tremor run through your body when he finally bottomed out and honestly he wasn’t in much better shape. 

“You ok?” you both asked in unison, smiles slipping onto your faces before you met each other halfway, the kisses slowly turning deeper, tongues tangling as Lewis slowly started to grind his hips down into yours.  You hooked your legs around his lower back, one hand around his neck, the other resting on his back, little mumbles of his name falling from your lips as he started to move a little faster, slowly finding a pace to please you both. He shifted his hips just a bit and your back arched.  “Right there” you whined and he chuckled, rolling his hips to hit that certain spot again, enjoying the way you whimpered for him “Right there huh?” your moans was his only reply.

__________________________

Lewis could feel your walls fluttering around him, could tell you were close. He slipped a hand between your bodies, thumb teasing your clit and when your orgasm crashed into you, your nails dug into his shoulders even through the shirt, your legs trembled, moans and whimpers falling from your lips as he worked you through the aftershocks.

Once he could feel your body calming he slowed down, planning to stop but your eyes flew open, a pout gracing your beautiful face “Why’d you stop? Don’t you wanna cum?” “Wanna take care of you” he breathed, lips brushing your cheek. You nodded, hips bucking up to meet his “Then cum for me Lewis, you already made me feel like I’m in heaven love. Just take what you need, please. I’m yours”

He buried his face in your neck, hips snapping into yours. He hadn’t felt this much pleasure ever. He was honestly surprised he’d lasted this long. He hadn't been with anyone since he left for the war, not being one for flings and you felt amazing. You leaned up, tongue flicking out along his pulse and he moaned out your name, his release hitting him so hard his muscles locked up, lower body trembling as he filled the condom, hips giving small thrusts as he worked both of you through it.

Your fingers teased into his hair, tugging him gently into a kiss. When your lips met you mumbled “That was amazing Lewis. You’re so damn big and gorgeous and took care of me so much better than I’ve ever imagined being taken care of” every little praise that fell from your lips made his hips unconsciously thrust into you deeper. 

He was so fucked because he was certain you were the one for him, the other half he’d long since needed. He just had to figure out how to keep you, how to be the man you needed. You tugged him back into a kiss that quieted his mind and he groaned lightly “Let me clean you up then we’ll lay down proper” “Ok handsome” you whispered, pressing another small kiss to his lips.

____________________

Lewis woke up, a fine sheen of sweat covering his body despite the room being cool. Memories, flashbacks had flooded his subconscious yet again, the worry he’d wake up and this would all be a dream. Surviving, coming home, finding you… just things that a dying man’s mind made up in its final moments as a means of comfort. 

Instead, you laid in his arms, back pressed tightly to his chest, fast asleep. He let out a shuddering breath and gently pressed his lips to the back of your neck, smiling to himself when you shifted closer back to him. He finally found something, someone that brought him the peace he’d been needing for so long. He just prayed to anyone listening that you felt the same.

You let out a soft noise, turning in his arms as you stretched while yawning. You leaned up and pressed a drowsy kiss to his nose and he couldn’t have stopped the grin that spread across his face if he had tried when you muttered “I could get used to this” before cuddling closer into his chest.

He could feel every inch of his body relax, his mind taking a breath at your words before he said “You can have this whenever you want honey” you grinned up at him before tugging him into a gentle kiss.

Lewis knew he couldn’t keep wearing a shirt around you, couldn’t keep dodging your offer of sharing a bath after a long day, couldn’t keep resisting the way your eyes would trail over his clothed chest like you were silently begging him to give all of himself to you.

That scar was an ugly reminder of everything he wanted to forget. He didn’t want to scare you with it but a part of him knew it would never scare you off.

__________________________

Lewis walked into the bedroom and you were already laying in bed, wearing one of his shirts. He was tip-toeing around asking you to just move in but didn’t want you to think he was pushing anything. It was just anymore the two of you spent every night together. 

He stopped at the cloth hamper, hesitating with his hands on the hem of his shirt. The nights were getting warmer anyways. 

He hadn’t even noticed he had your attention until you softly called his name. When he looked up you smiled gently “You don’t have to do anything you’re uncomfortable with” his heart flipped, god he loved you. “No honey, if i plan to spend the rest of my life with you, you’ll see it at some point either way” 

“Rest of your life huh?” you teased lightly and he chuckled “As long as you’ll have me” he swallowed hard, tugging the shirt up and over his head. His gaze dropped down to the floor, not wanting to see pity in the eyes of the woman he loved, not wanting to see your feelings change in real time.

Your eyes widened when Lewis tugged his shirt off. You of course noticed the mound of scarred tissue nearly dead center of his chest. The thought of what he had to have endured to carry that made your heart ache. The worst thing was he thought he was anything less than gorgeous because of it. He was absolutely beautiful. The broad shoulders, the speckling of freckles and moles. The smaller scars littered here and there and yes even the big one. All a testimony to just how much of a survivor Lewis Ford was as a man.

You slipped off the bed, walking across the floor. When you got in front of him, you cupped his chin gently, forcing his eyes to meet yours. The uncertainty there made every inch of you ache. You smiled softly “Can I touch you?”

Lewis nodded the moment you asked, of course you could touch him. You stepped closer and his eyes fluttered close for a moment when your fingertips danced across the skin feather light followed by your lips pressing a kiss to the center of the scar. You looked from his chest to his face before saying “I don’t know what caused it, nor do I need to know until you’re ready to tell me but I thank every higher power there is that you survived it because I don’t know what my life would be right now had I not met you”

Lewis felt his breath catch in his throat when your words fully processed, a groan leaving him before he tugged you into his arms, lips crashing against yours in a kiss that left you both reeling “I love you” he muttered into the kiss, the words finally finding their way out. You smiled, turning to walk him backwards to the bed. You gently pushed him down into a seated position then climbed into his lap, “I love you too Lewis and for all its worth I think you look incredible and if you’ll let me I’ll prove it”

He looked up at you and there wasn’t an ounce of pity in your eyes or uncertainty. No, the only thing reflected there was love and a deep hunger he felt in himself for you. He nodded, a grin tugging at his lips “Yes ma’am” so you pushed his shoulders to ease him back “Good”

__________________________

Lewis walked into the bathroom the next morning and froze. It was the first time since he’d been home he truly looked at his reflection while shirtless. This time instead of his eyes focusing on the scar, they lingered on the careful marks left behind from you. Proof of you, that he survived, that the two of you had found each other. For the first time in years he could tolerate his own reflection because your love was louder than the pain.

You walked up behind him, arms snaking around his waist and he felt you press a kiss between his shoulders “I love you Lew” you whispered and he smiled “I love you too honey. I want you to meet my squad if you’re up for it” he looked in the mirror, at your reflection where you’d tucked your head up onto his shoulder and you grinned “I’m up for it”

“Ford is coming?” Rosenfield had to make sure he heard Boyce right. This would be the first time they’d seen their Corporal in a while. They all spoke to him regularly enough but he’d been cut off for so long. Tibbet shrugged, nodding towards Boyce “This one said he’s doing better. My uncle says he doesn’t miss a month so there’s that”

As if on cue the bell over the door of the restaurant dinged, getting all three men’s attention. They leaned up and spotted their Corporal walking in. He was dressed in black pants, a button down dark shirt. Looked good, like he was finally taking care of himself. 

What they didn’t expect was for you to be on his arm. None of them knew about you except for Boyce. They watched as Lewis slipped an arm around your waist, whispering something in your ear, both of your faces lighting up. “Ford’s got a gal?” Tibbet chuckled.

The two of you walked over, Lewis keeping you close. When you got to the table all three of them stood up so Lewis introduced you. You smiled “Nice to meet you all” “Let’s get some food and catch up” Boyce offered and Lewis nodded, pulling out your chair.

__________________________

By the end of the evening, you were laid over on Lewis’ shoulder listening to the four men talk and was stunned to know they only actually served together about two days actively. “Bonds forged in fire sweetheart” Tibbet told you with a wink.

“It’s nice to see you like this” Rosenfield told Lewis and you cut your eyes at him “Like what?” “Human” all three other men answered before they all burst out laughing and Lewis shook his head “Excuse these idiots beautiful” you grinned “They’re fine, I can tell it’s all in love” 

__________________________

All of you walked out together, making plans to catch up again soon and Boyce was going to bring his girl Chloe next time. They watched you and Lewis head to his truck and waited until you were both in the truck before Tibbet let out a low whistle “How long before we get wedding invites?” 

“A year?” Rosenfield offered and Tibbet shook his head “Eight months top” Boyce laughed “Ford wont make it another five months without putting a ring on her”

in the next few days, you watch on as he sorts through his belongings, packs clothes, a small keepsake that he’d gotten from his mother once he shared the news with his family as well. his father only remarked that deployment might finally knock some sense into lewis, but his mother was inconsolable. even if she’d stayed with his dad for so long, what other choice did she have? she didn’t work, she wasn’t able to earn any money, and being a single mother would only harm her reputation with everyone in the neighbourhood.

that evening, she had kept lewis close, kept hugging him to her chest, and he just let her, he wished she had a choice, wished he had a choice as well, but with no other way out of this either of them just had to accept it.

before he left, his father grew quiet, before rummaging through a drawer in the living room. motioning for lewis to come closer, he let a heavier than expected bundle fall into his hand.

"maybe it’ll come in handy."

when the cloth reveals a trench knife, kept in pristine condition, lewis’ eyes widen slightly before settling on his dad. no other words are shared - merely a huff, a nod, as he takes a step back. the gift won’t make up for all of his past mistakes, but it at least means he’ll be more able to keep you safe.

the knife is packed securely into the bottom of his backpack, hidden beneath socks, briefs, and undershirts.

"c’mon buck, you can’t-" you turn around with a snarl.

"what the fuck am i supposed to do, huh? just let you walk into this by yourself?"

"yes!" his chest is heaving, as is yours, and lewis drags his hand through his face with a low groan, eyes tired when they meet yours again. but his voice softens, even if still rough around the words. "i’d never forgive myself if something happened to you." you take a tentative step forward, towards lewis, and give him a sad, little smile.

"and i’d never forgive myself if i let the only family i have go through hell by himself. you’re the only one i got, lew. i won’t let you abandon me."

silence washes over the two of you, still stood in the living room where the argument had started, until lewis sighs in defeat. fuck you for being just as stubborn as him.

with a shake of his head, he pulls you into a hug that you gladly return, arms wrapping around his back as you hide your face in his shoulder.

"we’ll manage, i don’t care how," you whisper, voice barely louder than a breath, and he answers by resting his chin on the top of your head.

"i know. but i’m still scared of losing you." you huff and pull back, sad grin on your face when you meet his gentle gaze.

"i’ve survived so far, and so did you. we just won’t let each other out of our sights," you muse, and lewis can’t help but chuckle at your teasing words.

"i’ll do my best, buck. try to keep your head down, still though."

"what, you afraid i’ll get you in trouble?"

you enlist right after lewis, too stubborn to let him die somewhere alone in a ditch, and once the soldiers at the base he drove you to in his beat up truck see your language qualifications, they reluctantly let you join the army as a field translator. 

the entire way there, lewis still tried to deter you, keep you home, safe, at his place - even arguing that it might be nice to have a familiar face to come home to. he wants nothing more than to protect you, even if that means dying alone, but even then he knows that you’d probably still follow him than continue without him. he’s the only thing you got resembling a home, so you would rather endure hell at each other’s side than heaven without.

you’re glad about your italian knowledge, because it meant that you would be sent out together with lewis in the following weeks. mandatory training in both medic fields and in weapon handling had gone by in a hitch, and with your determination to keep lewis as safe as you possibly can, you end up near the top scorer of your group - even as the only woman besides another dedicated nurse.

any time you’re looked down upon for being a woman, nevertheless a woman that’s not in a nurse uniform, lewis makes sure to put that person in their place. it’s no wonder when that gets him the reputation for being fiercely protective over you to the point nobody even thinks about bothering you besides some freshly drafted soldiers that still think this is all going to be over in a few months tops. and with lewis being tall, one of the tallest soldiers at the base actually, and having had a while of working on cars helping his physique, nobody wants to mess with him either.

you can defend yourself easily, lewis knows that - he’s seen you stand up for him against much taller and stronger kids when you were younger and he was a little lankier than he is now. but all of the trauma you had gone through, both together and by yourselves, still keeps him close by at all points. and while he’s the quiet, brooding type, you’re a spitfire, not afraid to give even superiors a piece of your mind.

neither of you are, as long as the other person is involved.

when the notice that you’ll be shipped out to italy comes through to both of you, you find each other near the side of the base, wanting to have some relaxed moments together before you get out of the safety your current whereabouts provide. lewis’ head leans against the wall behind him, seated on the bench as he watches the other soldiers play cards, and you flip through your notepad.

"can’t wait for the shit they’re gonna have us eat," he mutters disdainfully, and you bark out a quiet laugh.

"have you tried the rations?" he shakes his head in reply to your question and closes his eyes, shoulders hunching inwards as he breathes out a sigh.

"just heard from the others that they taste off. like they were too far beyond the expiration date for regular people, but not quite enough for soldiers." your laugh makes the corners of his lips turn up, the stubble that decorates his jaw and above his upper lip after not shaving for a few days following the motion. your eyes catch on it, too, before you drag them away to read through your notes and vocabulary again.

"not at all like my cooking then, hm?"

"i wish buck, i wish."

silence falls over you, only broken by the laughter of the other soldiers in the near distance, much more carefree than either of you feel like you can allow yourselves. you know this war could go on for months, stretch out to years, and you know that you could lose each other at any given moment. as you lean back, similarly to lewis, and your eyes fix on the men that could barely qualify for anything other than teenagers, your free hand moves up to absentmindedly play with the two rings on your chain. the weight of the simple gold bands, worn out by time and love, soothes your mind, and when they clink together with a quiet sound lewis moves his head to look at them, at the way your fingers weave around the metal.

"you gonna keep them with you?" he asks, and you nod.

"they would’ve wanted to watch over me. grandpa gave them to me as a good luck for my future, so i’m gonna do my damn best to make sure i have one."

lewis swears to himself that he’s gonna do his best as well.

author's note: god, any stolen moment these two have makes my heart cry

stay safe and healthy <3

process: