#coonrants

OKAY SO FIRST OF ALL

Congratulations on starting an original book!!! WOW, BUDDY, THAT’S PHENOMENAL! THAT’S FANTASTIC!!! Holy moogles above, I’m SO excited and so happy for you!!!! :D

It takes something to start a project like that. Mostly because I know you care about what you’re doing, you’re not just one of those random people that write mere trash not knowing what they’re talking about. I think I’ve never read anything from you, but I don’t need that. From our interactions and the way you write even if it’s just in a conversation, I can tell for sure that you care and you’re GREAT at it. Besides, you wouldn’t be stressing this much if you wouldn’t care a bout it, right? 

That’s your first big hint that should help you calm down and be happier about it; the fact that you’re putting a lot of you into it. All this stress and the way the block is depressing you, all these feelings and all these sensations, you wouldn’t be feeling them if you didn’t care. If it wasn’t something special for you. If you didn’t want it to turn out fantastically.

I don’t mean to say that you need to be stressed and depressed every minute as you work on this, no. It’s okay once, twice, every here and there, but every time that it happens, you take that negativity and you see it from the other side. Because, in the end, the fact that you feel all that is because you care, and if you care, don’t you think that that means that you’ll give the best of yourself?? And that because of that, the results will be AMAAAAAAAAAAAAAZING!?!??!

I trust in that!!! Sometimes, the more excited you are and the more you care about a project talks about how much effort you’re willing to put into it. I know it’s just a fic, but look at Iggy and the Beast, for example. How I can so easily get nervous and anxious about it, and yet, how nice it is, how much effort and love I?m putting into it. It’s the same. You worry because you care, and if you care, it means you’re working and will work on it with every fiber of your body. And that, my friend, hard work given with all your might…that is half the way to your goal. :)

Now, as for advice as itself on what I do when I have a writer block, that’s pretty tough to ask…

Sometimes, it’s the things every internet page recommends you. Listen to music that fits the mood or scene you’re writing. Take a breath. Brainstorming (i was about to say ‘shower of brains’ ahahahhaha). And they work, they do sometimes.

But you know what I feel you need? The way you describe your block and how it makes you feel, the…essence or vibe or color that your ask as itself radiates. It sort of tells me of the one thing that took me so long to understand.

To get rid of your block, stop writing.

Sounds weird, doesn’t it? Like, you feel you’re too slow at running no matter how hard you practice, and the trainer tells you the best thing you can do is sit down and do nothing. Or you feel like you’re not doing progress with your new jutsu and Kakashi tells you the best you can do is go rest (AHA! Saw your comment on my Naruto post recently! <3). But wasn’t Kakashi right every time? I mean, I can’t in a mILLION LIVES, COMPARE MYSELF TO ALMIGHTLY LORD AND GOD KAKASHI BUT LIKE. IT WAS A WAY OF SAYING IT.

You know, Jaz…sometimes what we need to progress at what we’re doing is stop what we’re doing for one second. I don’t mean forever. I mean for one second, and by one second I don’t mean that advice of ‘go take a walk and take a fresh breath and then try again’, nope. I mean, three days, two weeks, one month. Not just a minute or an hour. 

Creating isn’t meant to give you a hard time, and it definitely isn’t meant to depress you. Art is meant to be a way to express our feelings, not to worsen them. Art, indeed, has never meant to be a way to heal; what heals us is to vent out our feelings,w hich we do through art, but art as itself isn’t mean for the task. Same for the other way around, it can transmit great negativity, but it’s never meant to build it. And if you’re getting some out of it, then you need to stop.

We have limits. Physical, emotional, in every way we have limits. That includes the limits of our creative process. As much as we love creating, we’re not meant to do it 24/7. Nobody is meant to do anything 24/7 other than blinking and breathing and existing, but no activity is meant for such amounts of time. You tire yourself. And what do you expect to happen when you exhaust yourself but destruction?

Think of it like a physical challenge. Imagine writing is running, and you’re training to jump into the junior leagues or whatever the first professional round is called. So you, OBVIOUSLY, go to train, right? And what do you do to get better and faster at running? Well, you practice. You run. So you run and you run and you run. And then you hit your limits, that point where the muscles are at one movement of breaking and your lungs are all stressed and you as a whole are feeling terrible.

BUT RUNNING IS YOUR PASSION,R IGHT??? AND IF IT’S YOUR PASSION AND YOU WANT TO GET REALLY GOOD AT IT, YOU HAVE TO PRACTICE EVERY DAY ALL DAY, RIGHT?

So you keep going and going.

And I assume you know the whole mess that happens then,r ight?

This whole thing about how…when you keep going after you hit your limits, you start having a backwards effect. Instead of getting faster, you’re getting slower. Instead of running better, you’re starting to stumble. Instead of getting healthier, you’re damaging your lungs, heart, other organs, and your muscles. And when the time to race comes, you’re so worn out, that you don’t make it 5 meters past the starting line before you’re already wasted.

…same for writing and any other creative process, Jaz, my dear.

You can’t push yourself too hard for too long. There’s limits. Writing every day is super healthy, but not for too long that it starts stressing you and depressing you. Sometimes, writer blocks hit randomly or for this or that. But you know what I think is happening to you, specifically? That you’re over-worrying about the book, and you’re so nervous, and you’re working too hard in it, that your brain went “That’s it, I can’t take more. I need a break from this specific thing”, and of course, naturally, it shut your writing spirits down.

And if you keep insisting on breaking it yourself, you’ll only worsen it, because we CAN’T fight against the brain’s orders! Brain wouldn’t block something if it wasn’t for OUR health. And if you insist on trying to write and write and write and write, you’ll be hitting that metal wall your brain set, and when it weakens, brain will put a SECOND, thicker, stronger barrier, and a third and a fourth AND HOW DO YOU PLAN ON BREAKING DOWN FOUR UNBREAKABLE BARRIERS, HM?

Your brain knows you’re tired. It knows this is poisoning you…your brain is only trying to block what it’s started to identify as an enemy. Don’t insist on making it worse. And don’t make of writing your enemy. Writing is an ally, a friend, a sister, a mother, a deity of its own, and it needs respect and love. Not your brain’s hatred.

And I tell you all this from experience. Why do you think the Beauty and the Beast updates take so long in between? I’m rather fast at writing (my long asks show it), so 15k is a thing of 2 or 3 days for me. So why aren’t updates weekly? 

Because I learned all this the bad way. Because I was starting to let writing, my dearest beloved art, transform into a poisoning monster that ate me. I wasted and exhausted myself worrying too much, writing too much, and giving too much, until I started doing it by force, like something that I feared but still had to do, until writing was not my friend but my owner. And no one owns no one here. You and your writing are friends. Should be friends.

Maybe you didn’t notice, because I didn’t say it explicitly, but the fic’s updates were relatively fast, and the one day I started playing Comrades and everything I talked about was Comrades, and then Dragon Age, and the updates were slower. It was because I learned that only when I stop can I continue, as ironic as it sounds. 

And sometimes it happens to specific things. Right now I’m VERY motivated for the Corqi fic, but when it’s about my ask requests or Iggy and the Beast, I’ve got to take these breaks in between. Because my asks had that effect on me too. I would answer 12k to each, sometimes 2 a day, every day…of course I exhausted myself beyond the limits.

So that’s my current advice to you, because it feels like you’re on this one specific problem, Jaz.

I wouldn’t know when it’s the ‘right’ time to come back. I don’t think there’s one specific ‘right time’. So long you let yourself rest as much as you need, then you can go try take the computer and open the document again. If, even before you write one word, it weighs in your mood, you’re not ready yet. So go back to take a break from this project, then come back some other day and try again. 

And I forgot to say, remember creators are always their greatest and toughest judge...and know that you can’t see your work as everybody else does, because you saw it grow. You remember its ugly stages. You can’t see the real beauty of it. It’s okay to correct as many things as you need to feel comfortable, but know that there’s not a thing like ‘perfect’. Not one thing is except math. But when it comes to art? Not a thing is perfect. Especially not to the artist/creator.

Remember, and I tell you this because many art and music and theatre and literature teachers told me in my high school, your art is always a thousand times more beautiful than you can see. It’s not advice or encouragement. It’s a fact.

And those are my advices to you, dear Jaz. I’m really excited and proud knowing you’ve taken up on such a journey, but I worry you may turn it into poison. Do not. Long journeys need good rests, or you’ll stay stuck in the middle and won’t reach the goal, right? So you take it easy. There’s no deadlines. There’s no pressure other than your own. Take it easy; create for the outside, don’t destroy on the inside.

Dear Jaz, I hope to hear from you again regarding this. And if this doesn’t work, you tell me and I try to figure something else out, because, as a reminder, I’m no expert and can only talk from experience!! But it’s okay. If the solution that works for me doesn’t work for you, it doesn’t mean you’re broken. We just operate differently and you need another sort of medicine, and we’ll look for it together if needed, okay? <3

Thank you for the good wishes and the trust, dear Jaz. And thanks for giving me a chance to put my thoughts in order (I just wrote ‘my orders into thought’ lmao) and to let me reflex!!

I wish the best for you and that original book. I bet it’s going to be phenomenal. :)

Look, I REALLY want to freak out here because ZOMG IT U, but the truth is I can’t look at your inbox and freak out because I HAVE FAILED YOU OTL

It took me forever, but I did add the tags to yoru artwork where I asked you if you wanted me to…it’s here, if you want to check it out, but…know that I failed you… ;A;

Tumblr only allows 30 tags and there was NO WAY on this planet that I would put my thoughts and impressions of your artwork in only 30 tags, considering as well the space I use for search purposes which left me with like 20 and as hard as I tried to fill them as much as they allow me to, I just…didn’t get even ¼ to what I wanted to express… OTL

So I’m sorry that I kept you waiting for so AGONIZINGLY LONG and it’s not a big deal. You probably expected more but what did you expect me to say? Your art is beyond my vocabulary and mortal comprehension, I couldn’t do it as hard as I tried…forgive this mortal that adores your art but has no idea of how to express how much, almighty Aestrama… OTL

SO WHAT ABOUT I KEEP RANTING HERE BECAUSE I DON’T FEEL FULFILLED YET

IT’S JUST

AKSDLJF

AKSLDJFG LKAJDFKLAS GDKLJLAKDJ FLDKAGJALDKGAD JLK

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY WHOLEHEARTEDLY LOVE THAT ARTWORK OF YOURS KAJSDKALJG OMG I HAD ALREADY SEEN TWO OR SO ARTWORKS FROM YOU BUT THAT ONE SORTA SLAYED ME ;A;

The Regis-Noct relationship is my fave and it’s always so heartbreaking and touching, and you made it so…beautiful in a way I can’t describe. Your artwork itself radiates all this joy, all this sentiment, kasjdladkgjadkgjda, the artwork contains some load of emotion, and it transmits another load, and honestly, that’s what I think art is.

Not to talk about your art. Which is what I think I talked the less about when it should have been in first place because WOWEE, LOOK AT YOUR ART!!!!!!!!!! <3 I’m so very and really in love with your style itself, and I don’t know how to describe it. I LOVE how you draw mouths and eyes, faces and expressions in general. I LOVE how you draw everything, from hair to face shapes aksjdfklgjda everything turns out so GOOD AND PRETTY

And that one artwork is so good and so nice, because while it’s a fun and cute style, it’s not an artwork to laugh with, it really is touching and heartwarming. It may be the look on Regis’ face, happy and content, when in canon we’re not used to see him smile. I LOVE the colors and how you mad eof blue and black hues so happy and lighthearted. Lighthearted, that’s a word I’d give to it. That, and wholesome.

All in all, I think that your WONDERFUL art skills and the emotion within, plus the emotion it transmits really do a fantastic and phenomenal job at giving that one artwork its impact and impression. It’s really something I can’t put into words and that I will forever love akjsdlkajg aaah… ;__________;

AND THAT’S THAT. I’M SORRY I BURST INTO A RANT, IT’S JUST- I LOVE THAT WORK SO MUCH OTL

A-aah….and…omg…thank you for thinking that my pseudo is amazing, ahah, aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!!!!!!!!!!! (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄) Thank you!!! <3

Also, I get what you mean with checking reblogs in case people put something in the tags. I do that, too, but sometimes I just stop checking because no one ever says a thing and I feel I’m just wasting my time. Which really made me think that the chances YOU checked the tags were so scarce, because a little writer with 20 or 30 tags gets tired sometimes from lack of tag content, and YOU, such a wonderful and skilled artist with 200 or more notes…??? So you probably check more reblogs with no tags, so it was probable you just didn’t check them anymore, which is fine and understandable!!

So it really surprised me that you sent this and let me know that you check them. That speaks so nicely about you…Thank you for taking the time to check the tags, despite knowing that maybe 1 in 15 people will say anything. Thank you, really, for checking them. It makes me so, so, so happy to know that my comments didn’t go to the void, at least now with you…thank you… :’)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AND THANK YOU SO SO SOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH FOR THINKING THAT I PUT SO MUCH ENERGY AND LOVE IN MY COMMENTS KLAJSD ALKGJ ADLKG JADLKGJ ADLKGAJD GLKA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Silly as it may sound, sometimes I do put so much energy into things, and I reblog so many things, that it does tire me out? Which is why, when I first reblogged that artwork of yours, I said that about being exhausted. Sorry if it sounds absurd… OTL

So that you notice that I put energy and love into my comments really makes me so, so, soooooooooooooo happy!!!!! OMg, thank you SO MUCH and immensely for acknowledging that!!!!!!!!! My tags most of the time (or so it feels) go to the void, so that you not only read them, but also acknowledge all the hype I put into them, it really means a lot to me!! ZOMG I DON’T KNOW HOW TO THANK YOU ASLDKFJG LKAJDG AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH ;w; <3

Thank you so, so, soooooooooo very and so dearly much for everything, dear artist. Thank you for taking the time to read the tags. Thank you even more for having taken up on my request and having dropped by to let me know that you were reading them. It really means a lot that despite how busy you may be and how much of a small blog I am, you still took the effort to write to me as a reply. Thank you for that, so, so immensely.

Thank you for your time and your attention, and thank you for being so immensely, incredibly kind and sweet with me. Besides a super skilled artist, you behaved with me like an incredible person. Thank you so much for being so nice and so friendly, you, wonderful creature… :’)

Thank you as well for sharing your PHENOMENAL art with us!!!! It’s made me so happy and I’m still marveled by it. Thank you!!!

All in all, thank you for everything, dear artist!!!!

Again, sorry for any tipos that may come up, as this computer is much bigger than what I had and hence what I’m used to and it still Will try to correct a lot of words.

Thank you for having the courage to tell me you haven’t been alright lately. It takes a lot to do that, sometimes. It’s very important and very good that you acknowledge that you’re not quite alright, and better that you tell someone of your trust. It seems like such a Little thing but it really is a big important first step to recovery.

Don’t worry about sounding repetitive. You’re not. Indeed, it would be strange that you didn’t talk a lot about this. Something like what happened is not something anyone experiences, and it’s not easy in any way. No matter how strong, patient, or anything else, it’s still a huge impact that leaves a giant mark. It’s not easy. Not the tiniest bit. And it’s no something you get over with. Something like this…sometimes, you don’t. Sometimes, you don’t get over this scenario.

And that’s okay. That’s valid, it’s normal, more common than it seems, and it’s okay. Maybe it won’t ever stop hurting. Most times, in these cases, the best we can get is that it hurts less with time, but no matter how Little it hurts, it still hurts. Because that’s how tough and big this is. It’s something crude and raw and it leaves a huge impact. It doesn’t matter that he wasn’t family or an intimate friend, you had a link, a bond with him, and no matter how weak or strong or close or distant, it was connected to you. And it broke, still beign part of you. Of course you can’t and won’t get over it. You can’t think that. You won’t. And it doesn’t mean that you can’t heal or that you’re doing bad or that you’re weak or that you’re being repetitive, because you’re not. You’re just hurt in a way that not many get hurt, and the scar Will always ache, and you can’t blame anyone and nothing for that.

And it’s sad? Yes. And horrible, because what you would give to stop thinking about it and stop aching. But still crying over it is okay, too. You’re a beautiful human being with a giant heart that feels. You can’t expect to not experience pain with such a big heart. 

I’m so, so, so wholeheartedly, immensely, and terribly sorry that the guy came out of the trials ‘clean’. Reading that made my heart weigh and drop, and it felt…like a punch in the guts. I can’t imagine how you felt. If there’s things I can’t handle and that I despise with every pore of my existence, that’s lies and unjustice. I can’t believe people are willing to let a culprit walk out with no consequences through the open doors. Someone that everyone knows is guilty, that did wrong, that should be punished….allowed out. On his own feet, clean, free, victorious. Getting away with such horrible crime…daring to take someone’s life, and be told ‘you can go home and continue your daily life’ as if…as if a human life didn’t matter. 

It gets on me. I’m disgusted, angry. I have this horrible taste in my tongue and this horrible sensation of a black hole behind the stomach. It sickens me. All the pain he caused…the wrong and bad he did, the blood he spilled, and the pain to dozens, hundreds of people that were taken from a loved one so unexpectedly. All that pain that he caused…taking a good life while his, bad and rotten, remains…it Angers me so much. He’s lucky I’m not personally involved, or I’d have probably paid someone to go get his head. I can’t stand this. I can’t believe it.

I’m so, so sorry Peridot. If I feel like this…so impotent, so powerless, so angry, so fucking angry and so frustrated…I can’t imagine what you’re going through. It must be the same, but a thousand, a million times worse. To know that that fuckface is in his house right now, free to live his life as if he didn’t take another one that was a million times brighter and more beautiful than his…gods fuck me, I’m so, so upset. My stomach is a mess right now.

Lack of witnesses or proof. What a fucking lie. There are a thousand methods to catch the culprit. My biology teacher (who has a doctorate) said it, there’s no perfect crime because there Will lways, always be something that points to the truth. What happens is that your friend wasn’t someone rich or famous, that’s what happens. Because when the rich are involved, they catch the criminal within a few days and sentence him immediately. But because the rest of us, middle and low class, don’t matter, so don’t our deaths and crimes. So they get lazy in investigation, and hence, lazy in trials, and hence, every criminal walks out through the fucking doors, free and victorious, knowing they can do it again and again and again because there Will be no consequences. Because we don’t matter. That’s how the law Works in almost every fucking country of this planet. Because we’ve normalized death so much, investigating death is someone’s ‘job’ only, because ‘this happens every day’. Yes, well, maybe if we actually investigated as if every life matteres, then maybe we’d catch all the criminals, and if they were all properly reprimanded, then maybe I DON’T KNOW, THERE WOULDN’T BE MORE CRIMINALS TO DO THE SAME????

Fuck me. I’m…so upset. So angry, so…unbelievably frustrated and impotent.

I’m so sorry, Peridot. I didn’t mean to rant to you. It’s just that I really can’t believe that he came out of that completely clean when everyone knows he’s not. Laws anger me sometimes because…sometimes it’s the laws what are an obstacle to justice. Everyone knows it was him, but because some stupid paper says ‘okay we know it was him but we need some material proof that shows he did it’, just because of that stupid concept…just because of that, despite everyone knowing he did it, you can’t jail him. 

I do would have liked him to stay in prison all life. You can’t take someone’s life like it’s nothing. Maybe he was nothing to him, but he was the whole world to his family and Friends. He was himself and that’s enough to deserve to live. I get that you’d have liked a Little it of justice. Even if it had been just communitary service, I’d have liked it. But to let him walk out of this entirely unharmed and untouched, like he’s some…privilaged untouchable Monster that can come and go as he pleases doing whatever he pleases with no consequences? Fuck. We can’t do that. I can’t believe this…

It’s okay and really reasonable that you’re angry, and sad, and disappointed. You must also feel frustrated, impotent, and so desperate in some way. Feel all that. Let it out somehow, so long it does no harm to neither you or anyone else. VEnt it and let it free, get angry and destroy something and kick something and be sad and cry and be frustrated and roar into your pillow, and idsappointed and talk shit about the laws and the trials, be desperate and stubborn and upset and don’t talk to anyone for a day and then cry more and then Yell and do anything you need to do to let it all out, ebcause if what I?m feeling is at least 1/50 part of what you’re feeling, fuck, you need it. Let it out. Feel it and let it burn. Because it’s a horrible, horrible, terrible, horrendous disaster and a chaotic experience, and you’ve got all the reason to be feeling as you’re feeling.

Oh, Peridot. I’m so, so sorry, my dear Peridot…I don’t know what to say or do. This experience is horrible and I’m so sorry you’ve got to go through all this unfair mess…I’m so sorry…

As about the job interview, I’m so sorry that they denied you, and I’m sorry that it felt like such a generic response. But don’t feel like it was personal and that you weren’t worth a proper response. It’s not that, Darling. Remember that the people that interview you are not always those sending the emails of rejection or approval. It’s a job, and Jobs usually go from those that interview you, and sometimes those choosing you are some other people, and sometimes, it’s also a third round of different people who send the responses. And they receive many applications…it’s not that you weren’t worth a proper response, it’s that they work that way with everyone.

And do remember what I told you when you came out of the interview and you told me how it went. IT’s not that you’re not good enough. They don’t discard you for being bad. They don’t choose the best, they choose the best suited for the job, and the fact that someone is better suited than you for THAT job doesn’t make you any less good or anything. We’re all good for different things in different measures, and I don’t doubt that you were qualified and a really good option for this job…so that you weren’t the best suited for it doesn’t mean you’re not qualified for it. Just, someone else suited their needs better, but that doesn’t mean you were bad or wrong. 

You did fantastic, and they were so nice to you, and that is not a lie. To them, you should be no one, so they have no reasons to be nice. And yet, they were. And if they were, that’s because they naturally felt and act that way. So it wasn’t fake, they were nice to you because they liked you. 

Please, don’t feel too bad about this. I know that it must have been very, very disappointing, but please don’t take it personal and don’t let it make you have bad thoughts about yourself. You’re excellent, you give your best, and you’re really well suited for anything you want to do. Feel bad about being rejected, yes, but know that applications for a job is like exams: they don’t determine how good you are or how worth it you are. They’re a general test, not one suited personally for you, and we’re all different with different abilities. A exam, a title, or a job application, none of that defines how good you are. They may be hints of what you need to get better at, but they never, memorize it, they never define you or your abilities or your worth. You know what you’re good at, you know what you can get better at, a piece of paper or an email or the judge or the employer don’t. You. 

So remember what I told you; Kuzco-fy yourself. Remember you’re fantastic, and amazing, and a deity. It’s them who are missing out their chance with you. And don’t take it in a bad way, try to see it in a good way. Being denied doesn’t mean you’re not qualified. J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter was denied by 12 different editorials. And that doesn’t mean that it was bad, or that she wasn’t qualified. Being rejected is normal, okay, and it doesn’t mean you won’t make it. You know what means you won’t make it? Giving up. Not moving on. Not trying again. IMagine if she hadn’t tried all those 13 times, that she had given up after being denied for a 7th time. Imagine not having discovered how huge of a thing HP would become.

Just recently I saw a video of an actress from Friends (I’ve never watched it so I can’t say who it was, but I do know of the huge impact Friends was), and she was rejected, too. Fired, actually, before starting the filming of another show, and it was BECAUSE she was fired from that one that she found her place in Friends. And the point of the video was her saying that, that sometimes being fired or rejected is what is meant to happen and it Will lead you to something way, way better. That it feels HORRIBLE at first, yes, but that’s just because you haven’t found that other door that wouldn’t have opened had you been accepted in that first one.

What I mean to say is, dear Peridot, that this isn’t personal, and that you’re going to find something better if you keep pushing forwards. And that you’re fantastic, and great, and you give so much good to the world, it’s only by nature going to come back to you, and that althought being rejected feels terrible, it’s sometimes only the process to get somewhere brighter and better.

I’m glad that you’re aware that I won’t get mad at your or anything. You know you can always drop by to tell me what’s in your mind and how I can help. Also, don’t refrain from talking to me despite my technical problems; my computer can’t be repaired. Or, well, it can, but it’s rather senseless because it was ‘old’ (seen from the perspective of how fast technology moves), and I had dropped it so many times before, the hardware is damaged and it isn’t very worth it.

I’m going to get a new one, but we’re very tight on money right now, so I’ll keep using my papa’s computer for a very long while. But don’t you worry and don’t let any of that refrain you from writing to me. Papa is out most of the day so I can use it then. I just gotta get used to the keyboard :)

And of course you can hug me. I’m already hugging you, you sweet muffin. That’s what I do best, right? Offer confort hugs and warm snuggles. I’m not a squishy ball of fluff just for no reason, squeeze and hug all you need and want, dear Peridot. You certainly can use a hug. Maybe it wont’ fix anything or make anything better, but it’s always a good confort that does well to the heart.

*snuggles back*

I’m going to stay curled up right next to you all the time you need. Or clingignt o your head and not letting go. Or hugged to you and snuggling. Anything and everything for the good warm huggles, all the time you need. That’s what I do best, even if it’s just virtually.

Dear Peridot, I feel frustrated because I don’t know how to confort you. I wish I was there to be able to physically do something, even ifjust stroke your hair. IT pains me to know you in pain, and experiencing such a crude thing. I’m so, so profoundly sorry that all this mess happened, and that you’re having such a rough time. I’m profoundly sorry for everything and for the way you’re feeling, my dear friend. 

Know that I’m with you, as are my best wishes and vibes. I’ll be asking mommy moon to try to do something to ease those horrible feelings invading you. And I’ll be thinking about you, wishing you the best, and hoping for you to find peace of mind soon. You’ve got me virtually to snuggle you, and across the ocean to keep supporting you and sending you the best vibes I have.

Dear Peridot, I wish I had more to say but...I’m rather speechless, and only able to share my empathy with you. I’m sorry all this is happening. You deserve much better.

Okay, oKAY, I want to freak out because HOLY FUCKING SHIT, IT’S AN ARTIST THAT GETS THOUSANDS OF NOTES PER ARTWORK, IT’S THE GENIUS BEHIND THE PROMPTO AND NOCTIS QUOTING MEWTWO COMIC, THIS IS A SUPERSTAR, FAMOUS DIVINE ARTIST WITH ANGEL HANDS THAT DRAW PHENOMENAL ART, IN MY GARBAGE LANDS AND TALKING TO ME, I’M FREAKING OUT, EVERYBODY CALM DOWN

But I’m gonna try to STAY STILL AND KEEP IT COOL, because I don’t want to creep you out and to keep this relatively in order instead of making THE MESS OF A 3-PAGES LONG RANT OF YELLING AND SCREAMING BECAUSE HOH MY GOD YOU’RE TALKING TO ME AKLSDJLAKDJGADLKGJDA I DIE

So first of all!

I’m sorry it took me so long to reply. The week’s been sorta messy and busy since friday ahah, so even though I did have time to answer to your ask, I wanted to do it only after I had added the tags. You know, just to let you know that I did. And…to not give you more work or so you don’t browse through your thousands of reblogs, here is the link...it’s not much, I filled my 30 tags too quick and barely started saying something, but just to let you know that I did. Heh. ;w;

Okay, I just got attacked by a sudden GIANT WAVE OF SHYNESS, but I’m still going to say the tings I have in mind and want to tell you hnhgnhg

Thank you so much for reading my tags. Thank you immensely for taking the time to do that, really. I know how Tumblr can be so deadly quiet, and how most of the people who reblog (IF they reblog) put nothing in the tags, a few tag general stuff, and there’s only comments in 1 or 2 reblogs. I say this not to credit myself, it’s not that. It’s just that, with the quantity of reblogs you get, and you saying that you check them ALL out…well, thank you.

I know it can be tiringto check reblog after reblog and see nothing over and over again. Anyone else would just give up and stop checking because no one says anything. So thank you for taking the time to check not just my tags, but everyone else’s, despite it not always turning as you may wish ;w;

Also, thank you so much for taking the time to write to me. You didn’t need to. It’s too much of me to ask from artists to tell me if they want me to add comments or not. It even sounds rude, “YOU contact me if you want to know what I think about your art”. Gee. It can come off as rude and not right…but I think you understood me. And for that I’m immensely grateful.

Thank you for reading my tags, and thank you even more for dropping by to tell me you did. For each 7 artworks I reblog asking if they’re seeing the tags, 1 replies. In this case, it was you. and I’m so hyped about it, you have no idea. Thank you so much <3

Aaah, also, no other ask of yours made it in. This is the only one I had, so no worries. And even if a million had made it in, no worries! It’s so insane that you took the time to write to me once, AND stayed to make sure it sent? That’s so sweet of you, it really is so kind, thank you so much for worrying about that and being so attentive… ;w;

Oh no, this is getting so long, but I’d really like to say more about your art because the tags weren’t enough, seriously…I’m sorry I keep talking aksljdakldjg I’m sorry ;n;

I just wanted to let you know that that comic is brilliant. Genius in every way. Many see just the joke, which is great enough, but seriously, I looked at everything and it’s…insanely mindblowing in the most beautiful way ever. The art itself is GORGEOUS beyond anything I can say. I don’t have words enough and I lack the vocabulary to express how INSANE and stunning your art is, it’s truly…a jewel, but better and prettier. 

Your artstyle is gorgeous no matter where you look at. Lineart, colors, textures, anatomy, expressions, there’s literally not a single thing that isn’t BEAUTIFUL. I’m keeping this very short because of how much I’ve written already, but seriously, your art makes my head explode because it doesn’t fit in my mortal brain. It’s so stunning, I have no way to describe it.

You’re FANTASTIC at making comics. I wouldn’t have known you need practice if you hadn’t added that in the tags. I love the flow and I think that it’s everything arranged in a very good way. I don’t know how to word it, forgive a non-native speaker ;n; But like, the way you placed everything where it is, the dialogue boxes and the characters, it all has a nice flow, and nothing looks off. I’m no artist but personally I’d say you’re AMAZING at comics <3

I’m in love with the expressions you drew, you have no idea. The sequence of Prompto confessing is insanely beautiful due to the load of emotion that it transmits. The joke is great, yes, but your add added it the real weight it needed and MORE. That 4 panel sequence is so GORGEOUS because it transmits and holds within all this pain, this serious sorrow, this huge weight of his identity crisis. Honestly, if you had decided to make it a drama, you’d have nailed it.

And you also nailed comedy FANTASTICALLY!! Which is insane, makin both things work out in such short lapse SUCCESSFULLY? Wow. That takes more than just “drawing pretty”. 

What I mean to say is that you’re a complete, phenomenal artist. Visually and emotionally, you draw wonders. You capture emotions, you draw really beautifully, and you’re creative and everything flows.

And basically can I have an autograph aksldjdalkgjadlkgjad

I’ll keep this ask as my autograph because oh m y g o d what were the odds such a giant of an artist wote to me??? :)

SO YEH, I’M SO PROFOUNDLY SORRY AND EMBARRASSED FOR THIS RANT, I UNDERSTAND IF YOU’RE CREEPED OUT KLASJDAKLDGJDAKLGJADGKL I’M DONE I PROMISE AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

But yeh. Thank you again for taking the time to write to me. That talks very niceyly about you as a person, too… ;w;