#cocohook38

Movie poster

Emma

David

Killian

James

Walsh

Ruby

Graham

Liam

Brennan

Here are a few of the chapter art pieces Jules did for the fic.

NSFW image, so just leaving part of it.

“Of course, you do.” An eerie voice whispered through the night. “You think you deserve anything?”

Killian spun towards the voice, sword in hand, only to be met with an empty street and flickering lamp post. Hearing voices was never a good sign, it was time to go home. He started for his and Emma’s home at a quick stride, his eyes focused on his surroundings.

“Do you really think you can run from us?” A new voice now, higher in pitch, giggled.

He quickened his pace.

“Aw, he thinks he can go back home. Home? You think they want you there? You think anyone wants you there? It’s not your home, it’s theirs and you’re intruding.”

The last voice had him sprinting down the street, if he could just get to the house, everything would be alright. He was almost there, the lights on in the windows, Emma waiting up for him again. And then everything disappeared. He was standing in an emptiness, no up, no down, no here or there. All alone. His sword still in hand and ready to strike he rotated around, looking for whatever monster seemed to think he was prey.

“You won’t find us.” Once of the voices sang out.

“Show yourself coward.” Killian spat out, his heart pounding.

“Why should we, when you already know who we are… dearie?” The last voice had ice running through Killian’s veins. It couldn’t be, it wouldn’t be, he wouldn’t let it.

“Did you think you could get rid of us that easily? Did you think we wouldn’t find you?” The voices came together, whispering their bloodstained words around him.

The dark ones, those voices that had haunted his waking days. His body shook involuntarily, he took a breath and gripped the sword hilt tighter, they wouldn’t beat him.

“This is a dream.” His voice didn’t waver, though inside he screamed. “You’re not real, and you’re not here. I just need to wake up.”

“Oh, do you now?” The voices laughed, “Go on then, wake up.”

Try as he might, he couldn’t wake up. A cold dread washed across him. It couldn’t be real, how was it possible that it was back. The voices wrapped around him like a cloak, he felt like he was suffocating.

“Did you think it was that easy? Did you honestly think you were rid of us?”

“Leave me alone.” Killian gritted his teeth.

“Maybe it was a trick, maybe it was a dream.” The voices volume dropped to a whisper, echoing in the void. “You made yourself believe you had died a hero, that you were brought back because you deserve to be. Would you like to see what you’ve actually done?”

The scene changed to Storybrooke, but not how he’d last seen it. Buildings destroyed, roads cracked, trees felled. With utter horror Killian turned in a slow circle. The smell of smoke and death permeated the air. He stared at the fallen bodies around him and broke. He fell to his knees as his heart shattered into a million pieces. What had he done, what had he become?

“You did this. You think you’re good? You think you’ve changed? This is what you’ve become.” The voices swirled in the smokey air. His hand came up to clutch his head, covering his ears. He couldn’t reconcile the reality, he couldn’t believe he had done it, and yet it appeared he had. He had nothing now. The first tears began to fall.

As abruptly as the scene had change from the void to here, it shifted again. His arms were painfully yanked away from his head, he heard and felt a snap as they protested the movement. His head shot up and took in his new world. The underworld. Relief pushed through the pain, this had to be a dream then, he hadn’t hurt anyone. His relief was cut of by another punch of paid as a fist connected with his face. He winced as blood tracked down his face. Looking up he met Hades grinning face.

“Didn’t think you’d be rid of me that easy, did you?” Another blow landed on his cheek, was that crack the sound of his jaw breaking? “I wasn’t finished having fun with you!”

The torture lasted for what seemed like hours. Killian’s body began to numb with the pain. His vision faltered and blood dripped steadily down his face. He had long since stopped screaming in agony, his throat raw from it. When Hades finally left him, he sagged down in his chains and quietly begged it to be a dream. It would be the worst one he’d had, but if this was real. If him being brought back to life by Zeus, being able to be with Emma again, had been a trick… well he didn’t know if he could handle that knowledge. From his slumped position he spotted a wire, one that had been broken off from the cage he was in.

His body protested as he reached to pick it up. With a quick glance around to make sure he was alone, he set to picking the lock. It took precious minutes, the wire slipping from his lips multiple times as he shook with the effort, but finally his hand was free to pick the lock that chained his brace to the ground. When he was free, he stood up and nearly blacked out. Steadying himself against the cage walls, he breathed deep until he was sure he’d stand firm. The cage was easy to pick, he was out within a minute and running down a hallway he wasn’t quite sure where it led too.

The tunnel darkened and narrowed, soon he was just running through the emptiness again. A light appeared at the end and he knew if he could just make it to the end, everything would be alright. As he ran, he began hearing voices, from whispers to shouts.

“Nothing but a Pirate.”

“How can I trust you now.”

“You thought you could ever be a hero? Be anything?”

The voices only grew louder, shouting every insecurity, ever insult he’d heard. And they hit their mark. Were they right? He’d thought so, time and time again he’d tried to be better, yet he always seemed to fail. Killian could see the light fading; he would never make it. In despair he crumbled to the ground. He would never make it back to Emma, maybe he never had.

~~~

Emma woke to a quiet home in the middle of the night. For a moment she let herself lie there, soaking in a feeling of… well not peace, but close. Things hadn’t been easy since the Underworld trip, but with Killian back at her side she could rest a little easier. She turned to face him in bed and frowned when she found his side cold and empty. Where was Killian? Sitting up she looked towards the bathroom but found no light on there. His hook was still on the nightstand with his brace. Any peaceful feeling she’d had melted away into panic. In a rush she jumped from the bed and, in sleep shorts and a t-shirt, ran down the stairs. He was no where to be found. She focused on breathing as her heart pounded in her ears. He’d been having nightmares ever since he’d gotten back, even sleepwalking a few times, but never had he left the house, and he’d never left the house without his brace.

Grabbing her coat and hat from the rack and boots from the shelf, she raced to figure out how to find him. A tracking spell! She hadn’t used her magic much since being the Dark One, it made her feel weak and sick, but this was for Killian. Focusing as much as possible she whispered a spell on the jacket he wore, hoping to all the Gods in the universe she would find him okay. The coat lifted into the air and began to move. She followed it, closing the front door of their home with a wave of her hand, her eyes never leaving the coat.

It was a cold and snowy night. The moon was somewhere behind a blanket of white snow clouds. Luckily the brightness of the clouds made it easier to watch her step as she followed the coat at a run. Snow was falling heavily, the flakes big enough you could see their shapes without trying. There was already at least 2 inches on the ground and it was piling up quickly. The coat made a sharp turn into the woods, if she wasn’t terrified before, she certainly was now. How far had he gotten? And why hadn’t she woken up when he left? She new without a doubt he did not leave of his own volition. Whether sleep walking in a nightmare or dragged away by Stroybrooke’s newest villain of the week, she knew he was in trouble.

It took another 15 minutes of searching, though it felt like hours to Emma, she had forgotten her gloves and long since felt the numbness spreading through her fingers and legs. The coat hung to her knees and gave her a little bit of warmth, but with the cold settling in and her panic to find Killian rising, her magic wasn’t working well. Even if she did find him, she had no idea if she’d be able to transport them back to the house. The coat began to slow and she picked up her pace to walk next to her, her eyes searching for a figure standing out between the bright snow and the shadows of the trees in the night.

She nearly tripped over him. While the snow aided some in the light, it wasn’t enough for her to find him without help. She stopped and for a moment she thought her heart might have too. He was nearly covered in snow. Face down and crumbled as if he had been thrown, he lay in only his black sleep shirt and pajama pants she had insisted he buy a week ago. Was he breathing? Was he still alive? She couldn’t bare to lose him again, not after everything they’d gone through.

“Killian?” Her voice shook as she knelt down in the snow. “Killian, please wake up.”

Frantically now she began to brush the snow off his face. His black hair gleamed against the snow, his face was pale and his lips nearly blue. She needed to get him inside and get him warm now. How could she? She looked around at the empty woods, begging for a miracle. Her head snapped up again as she recognized a part of the woods. They were near a cabin, a cabin! She didn’t know if it had any electricity, or food or anything, but it was worth a shot. She took the coat from where it still hovered above Killian’s body, and laid it over him. She quieted her mind and focused on her emotions, knowing that was the only chance she had at getting enough magic to help them.

The thought of losing Killian seemed to work and the coat wrapped tighter around him, slipping beneath and nearly pulling him from the snow. With a quick kiss to his forehead, she stood up and grabbed the jacket, beginning to pull in the direction of the cabin. She could be wrong, it might not be there, but she wouldn’t let herself think on that long. This was her only chance. Glancing down at his face, she pulled at the coat faster. After nearly 10 minutes of dragging him through the thick snow, she saw the cabin. It was still a ways off, set in a small clearing. She could feel the first aches of relief, and exhaustion. Emma gritted her teeth and continued to drag her limp pirate towards safety.

It seemed that right at the threshold her magic gave out. The coat loosing it’s sparkly and flattening on the stairs. Emma opened the door and turned to pull Killian the rest of the way in. Once he was in and she could close the door, she looked around. It was a small, nearly barren cabin, the dark wood of the trees outside had been used to build it. The windows had long since been frosted over. In the corner was a larger fireplace, with wood stacked neatly by it. A small couch sat across from the fire, old and worn, fabric tearing along the seams. Emma walked over to the fireplace and begged the fire to start quickly. It only took a few minutes before the flames were high and heating the room.

Emma quickly dragged Killian to lay next to the fire, her exhaustion was beginning to deepen and she didn’t know how much longer she would be able to stay awake. Once he was settled, she set about looking around the cabin for blankets. She found a small kitchen, barley room for the stove and pantry, but the pantry was stocked with canned food. Glancing out the small window to see the wind and snow picking up again, she was grateful they had food for however long they needed to stay here, bottled water was found underneath the sink, more relief. In a small bedroom just off the front room she found a pile of blankets. She grabbed all that she could carry and made her way back out. Kneeling next to him Emma began to undress him, knowing that if she didn’t get him out of the soaked clothes, her work might be for nothing. She chuckled to herself at what he might say if he was aware she was undressing him. She was sure she’d hear it when he woke up.

Undressed and bundled up in at least three blankets, Killian remained unconscious, she would have to hope he woke up soon. Glancing down at herself she realized she was still only in her t-shirt and sleep shorts, and she was freaking cold. She peeled off her useless coat and hat, the icy wetness seeming to burn her skin. Hanging them to dry on the couch with Killian’s clothes, she took the rest of the blankets, burrowed under the ones wrapping Killian, and laid them over the two of them. Body head was good right? She thought she’d read that somewhere, then had a brief flashback to when he pulled her out of the ice wall. He’d hung onto her so tight, lifting her off the ground and carrying her to the car. She remembered how good it felt to be in his arms, though she would never admit that out loud. He had barely left her side that night while she recovered. Emma looked up at him, brushing his hair back and kissed his jaw. He loved her, she loved him, it was time to put a stop to his fears and nightmares. She cuddled into him, and finally slipped into sleep.

~~~

Killian wakes up scalding hot, sweating and confused. He doesn’t open his eyes right away, still worried he’s back in that horrible nightmare, at least what he hopes was a nightmare. He takes stock of his body first, aches in his left shoulder and down his arm are the most prominent. It brought him temporarily back to the underworld portion of that dreamscape, his arms had been chained down roughly, he wouldn’t be surprised if it had yanked his shoulder out of place. That wasn’t a good sign for it being just a nightmare. Something was laying across his chest, it felt like an arm, and he realized that something was currently resting on his aching shoulder as well. He finally took a chance to open his eyes and pray he was home. He wasn’t.

Wood ceilings greeted him when he looks up, definitely not home, then where? He looked to the side and found himself next to a stone fireplace with a small fire burning, close to burning out it seemed. He looked to his other side and found Emma was curled on her side against him. A restless look on her face as she slept. Lines on her forehead creased slightly, her mouth turned down unhappily. He looked at her beautiful face, and was grateful that he was with her. Whether this was a dream or not, it was the best thing he’d been through in the past few hours. He had the urge to brush the blonde hair away from her forehead and caress her cheek. As he moved to do just that he realized two very important things. One, he was most assuredly not wearing a stitch of clothing underneath all those blankets. Two, Emma Swan’s very naked body was currently tangled with his.

The realization had him jolting slightly and beginning to look around for clothes, though he couldn’t turn his head much, nor peak over the mountain of blankets very well. He was debating on whether to move or not when Emma groaned and began to stretch. As she did so a leg came cross his body to adjust her position, her shoulders moved forward to dull the aches in her back. She mover her hand from where it was under her head onto his chest. Killian was pretty sure now he’d died and gone to heaven, there couldn’t be a better explanation for this brilliant, beautiful woman next to him.

“Killian?” Emma murmured groggily, her head tilting up to look at him with heavy lidded eyes.

“Aye love, I’m here.” He answered back. Faster than he had time to follows she was up and practically straddling him, leaning over him with the blankets over her shoulder and a worried look in her eyes. And she was most definitely not wearing clothes. Killian might like to flirt with her uncontrollably, but he was still a gentleman, his eyes stayed firmly fixed on her face. He wasn’t sure what caused the look of concern on her face but he wanted to wipe it off with a kiss and much more pleasurable activities. “Emma, what’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong?” There was an edge to her tone now. Killian had a feeling that he was about to get a dressing down, well more so than he already was. “What’s wrong?! Killian you almost DIED.”

He blinked he hadn’t been expecting that. When had he almost died? If everything that he’d just been through had been a dream, then the last time he had died would have been before the underworld, and he didn’t think that’s what she meant. Perhaps she was talking about the murderous expression that would come over Regina’s face every time she saw him out and about, he was sure she’d nearly incinerated him multiple times. He realized she was ranting now and focused on her words.

“—I knew they were getting bad but this bad. What if I hadn’t found you? What if I hadn’t woken up. Oh hell, I can’t handle it Killian, I just can’t.” Her voice broke on the last word and tears filled her eyes. He was even more concerned now.

“You can’t handle what, love?” His hand finally came up and cupped her face, he knew he’d missed something during his musings but he would focus more now.

“You DYING.” The shout rang through the tiny space he had deduced they were in. “Weren’t you listening? Killian you almost died. I woke up in the middle of the night to find you gone, not in bed, not in the house! You were just gone. And your nightmares have been getting worse but this, this is bad. I had to do the tracking spell and I used your jacket, and I didn’t even grab pants, just a coat and hat. The jacket lead me to the woods where I found you freezing to death and nearly covered in snow. You’re lucky I remembered this cabin out here in the middle of nowhere or we both would have frozen to death.”

As the words sank in, Killian grew concerned; allowing his eyes to roam over her body, not in lust but in worry, making sure she wasn’t injured. She didn’t seem to be, he didn’t see any signs of frostbite or burns from the cold. He let himself feel a little relief before his eyes met hers again. She still had tears in them, she wouldn’t allow them to fall, his Emma wouldn’t show that kind of weakness when she was angry, even to him. It was best to tell her what happened and talk then to let her continue to stare at him as if she expected him to keel over that moment.

“I had a dream, it started out in Storybrooke and I was so sure it was real—” He told her all of it. Every moment of agony, every word spoken and heard. He knew she needed to hear it all, so she could understand. When he was finished, they simply stared at each other. As Emma processed it all he finally got a good look around the cabin, it was small with a worn sofa, a window showing a multitude of snow-covered branches.

“It can’t go on like this Killian, this is getting bad. I don’t think I could take loosing you again.” Emma said quietly, staring at him intently. He looked away.

“I’m well aware love, but I’m working through it and it’s like I’ve always told you, I’m a—” She cut him off.

“A survivor. Yeah, I know you say that.” She paused. “But you didn’t, you didn’t survive while we were the Dark Ones, you didn’t survive until Zeus himself brought you back. So how am I supposed to believe that now? Because it sure as hell looks like your body is trying to kill you.”

“Maybe it’s time we talk about everything then.” Killian responded. He adjusted himself slightly, still very aware that he and Emma were nude and in extremely close contact. “And this might be better done with some clothes on.”

“Normally you’re trying to get me out of them, you want me to get dressed?” Emma raise her eyebrows at him in a poor attempt to imitate him. She moved to get off of him, brushing against his chest as she did so. He suppressed a groan and squeezed his eyes shut in an attempt to control himself. He heard her walk to the couch then felt fabric on his face. She had thrown his clothes at him. Once they were both dressed in what little clothing they had, dry thanks to the fire. Emma added more wood to the fire and moved to the door. When she opened it, she wasn’t surprised to find at least three feet of snow at the threshold. They would be stuck here for a while. She could attempt to use her magic, but her emotions were still all over the place and she didn’t want them to risk sending them somewhere else.

“Looks like we’re stuck here a while.” She called to him. “My magic is a little on edge right now and there’s no way we could make the trek home on foot with all this snow.”

Emma shut the door and turned to find Killian on one end of the little couch. She moved to the other end and wrapped a blanket around herself, a way to keep herself warm and a protection from the oncoming talk.

“What do you want to talk about.” She asked. He let out a mirthless chuckle.

“What shouldn’t we talk about? I feel that we’ve never truly discussed anything, we haven’t had the time. Where should we start? You as the Dark One? Me as the Dark One? Me dying? You only being able to say you love me when we’re in danger? Neverland? The year I spent without you? Going back to Storybrooke and having to fight the witch? Getting my heart taken by Rump—” This could go on forever, she thought.

“Okay, so a lot to talk about. Where should we start?” He looked at her quietly.

“Have you ever regretted me loving you?” He asked and she was stunned. Of all the questions she thought he would have asked if she did love him, not if she regretting him loving her. To Killian it was an easy question though, and one he feared the question too. He had been infatuated with her from the beginning, intrigued by her strength and resilience, charmed by her wit and sarcasm. He didn’t suppose it was in the cards for him to fall for someone, but Emma moved all of that when she held the knife to his throat and told him he was lying.

He had wondered through the few years, whether she had wished he would simply disappear, as many others in the town certainly wished. This answer was perhaps the most important one, and the one he feared most, but he needed to know.

“Killian, I could never regret you loving me.” Her voice was soft, yet her eyes held a fierceness that demanded he listen. He was. “Next to Henry, you are the only one that never gave up on me, never stopped fighting for me. I didn’t think I’d ever find a love like you, someone who would always put me first, maybe too much for their own good. Someone who would make me feel safe and loved and not alone. You did that, you made me feel that. I will never regret you and I will never regret us.”

He swallowed back a lump in his throat, determined to get through this talk. There was a possibility that it would change everything, but maybe it was for the better.

“I wasn’t a good man, Emma. I haven’t been that naval lieutenant I told you about in a long time. I don’t even know if he’s still in me. I feel that every time I’ve tried to be that man, I’ve fallen short. I don’t believe I’ll ever be worthy of you, or your love, but I do love you. I know that you aren’t ready to say it back, but I know you have feelings for me. We wouldn’t be living together otherwise.” At that she smiled warmly at him. “I just want to feel like enough for you.”

“This is the same problem you had when you asked Gold for your hand back. You didn’t think you were enough for me with what you were so you tired to change yourself. I don’t want you to change, that might sound a little selfish, but I believe you’re already a good man and you are enough for me. Missing a hand doesn’t make you less of a person, and it doesn’t make you less to me. You are what I want, no one else. I love you, Killian” His eyes widened as he heard those words fall from her lips, he was speechless. The three words he had wished to hear from her when they weren’t about to be torn away from each other.

Once again, they got lost in each other’s eyes, saying everything they needed too. Emma knew he’d been struggling since his return from the underworld. While everyone was mourning Robin, Killian had been brought back. She wouldn’t be surprised if he felt out of place now. It seemed quite a few people had wished that Robin had been the one brought back and not him. Regina was obviously at the top of that list, but Emma was done feeling guilty for nothing. She had spent enough time running away from anything that resembled love for fear that it would slip through her fingers. It was time to stop being afraid.

So, they talked, they talked about everything they could. The hours passed quickly as they shared happy memories and sorrowful moments. They talked of their insecurities and their worries. Their fears that they had never been able to tell anyone before. It felt like for the first time they were as honest and upfront about everything, and found out just how alike they were. It was refreshing to have someone who understood them so well. And by the end of it, both knew this was it for them.

The hardest part for both was talking about their times at the Dark One, and then the Underworld. Neither were keen on facing the fact that they had hurt people and made the wrong decisions.

“We, especially I, messed up Swan.” Killian’s eyes were full of sorrow.

“But all we can do now is move forward and be better.” Emma paused and replayed her words. “My mother must be really getting to me if she’s got me spilling out those words.”

Killian laughed and snuggled closer to her, over the hours they talked they had gravitated closer together. They were tangled together not unlike they had been under the blankets. Emma smiled and laid her head on his shoulder. She didn’t know if this would stop his nightmares, she might have to convince him to go to Archie for that to fully stop, but she had a feeling she wouldn’t be following her sleepwalking pirate out into a snow storm again anytime soon.

“I think I’m ready to go home.” She said to him. He raised an eyebrow questioningly.

“It’s a nice cabin, and I’m sure it wouldn’t be bad if we stayed here for a bit longer,” She hesitated. “But the fires out and neither of us have eaten. We could make something for dinner and just relax. I’d like to make good memories in that house.” Killian grinned at her.

“I can think of quiet a few ways to do that, love.” She laughed, and kissed his cheek. Then she closed her eyes and concentrated. With a disgruntled ‘Oof” they landed on their bed. The house was warm and cozy, though the sheets were cool from nearly a day’s disuse. Emma grumbled about needing a heating blanket while she went to check her phone. Killian was certain Henry would help him find where to order one of those, anything to keep his Swan warm and happy.

“Oh shit.” She muttered as she stared at her phone. Killian was by her side in an instant.

“Something wrong in town?” He questioned.

“No, just my dad wondering why I haven’t answered any of his messages today. It’s my day off anyway! Why is he even.” She trailed off as she read the last of his messages, then sighed and dialed his number. David answered the phone on the first ring.”

“Emma? Where have you been?! I’ve been trying to call you all day. Are you—” Emma cut him off quickly.

“I’m fine dad, I’ve been with Killian all day. It’s my day off, and there is no need for you to come down and defend my honor.” Killian grinned, his hand moving up to play with her hair while his other arm brushed against her waist. “No, you cannot kill him! He just got back and you would lose your drinking buddy.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” David protested, sounding slightly indignant.

“Why Dave, after all the time we spent at the Rabbit Hole together? Did I mean nothing to you?” Killian spoke, his smile widening as she egged her father on. Emma did her best to look unamused but her mouth twitching gave it away. Killian placed a kiss on her neck and she shivered, a new heat forming inside her.

“Killian if you touch my daughter.” David threatened. “I’ll come take off your other hand. I don’t care if there’s three feet of snow out here, I’ll do it.” Emma laughed.

“Dad it’s a little late for that.” There was a choking noise from the other line and Emma had to hold in another laugh. “So, if you don’t mind, I’m going to enjoy my day off. And tomorrow since it looks like we’re snowed in.”

“I’m sure we’ll find something to do to pass the time.” Killian added right before Emma hung up on a still speechless David.

“He’s going to kill you.” Emma laughed.

“He can try. He likes me to much, just won’t admit it yet.”

“Well, if he shows up on our doorstep in an hour demanding you duel him, you’re on your own.” Emma turned to face him and wrapped her arms around his neck.