#cike

— post created with the help of the sweet @itskvyhii (thank you)

"Raban shrugged. 'He mostly keeps to himself. He’s quiet. Trains alone and doesn’t really have friends.'"
— The Poppy War

Five years. Altan Trengsin spent five years at Sinegard Academy. And by his final year? He was a well-known loner. How does someone so brilliant—praised as a prodigy, top of every class—end up completely alone?

It’s impossible to overstate what it must’ve felt like. To be marginalized because of your skin, to carry a legacy that your classmates saw as slave blood, and then to survive in that environment by becoming something untouchable. A symbol. A trophy. The kind of brilliance people gawk at, but never befriend. Worshipped, but never truly known.

And it makes me think about Rin—how lucky she was, in a way. Because even at her loneliest, she had someone.

“Sounds like someone we know.” Kitay jabbed an elbow at Rin.
She bristled. “Shut up. I have friends.”
“You have a friend,” Kitay said. “Singular.” — The Poppy War

And that friend was Kitay. Her anchor. Her mirror. Her soulmate in every way that wasn’t romantic.
They held each other together. Until the end.

But Altan?

Who did he have?

I started thinking, surely, at least one of the Cike must’ve gone to Sinegard with him, right?
Right?

Wrong. And it hurts:

- Baji? Older. Already in the Baghra Desert prison.

- Suni? Same deal.

- Ramsa? Younger, also imprisoned for years.

- Enki? The team’s medic-slash-drug-manager. No Sinegard mention.

- Unegen? A literal fox.

- Aratsha? Nope.

- Qara and Chaghan? Spies met later on, not schoolmates.

Oh, and Jiang? The only person who might’ve understood him? Abandoned him after two years. Altan spent three more years completely alone. Fighting to keep his god at bay. Fighting to prove his worth. With no one to lean on. No one to say “you’re not crazy,” no one to share the burden with.

And then we’re surprised when he drowns in opium? Honestly… who wouldn’t?

still, here’s what kills me:

Altan was not someone who wanted to be feared or worshipped. Not really. I see it as a facade. He was someone who wanted to be loved. Appreciated. To be seen not as a weapon, but as a person. And that comes through in the quietest ways—like when Rin interrupts his training in the gardens:

But Altan just looked surprised, not irritated. ‘Stick around Jiang long enough, and you’ll learn plenty of arcane forms.’” - The Poppy War

That’s year five. Three years after Jiang left him. And he still remembers his teacher with warmth. Still holds onto those moments like they meant something. Because they did, to Altan. Jiang was the one person who ever showed real interest in him. Cared for him. Believed in him. And Altan clung to that memory like a lifeline. And the tragedy? He never got to know that Jiang regretted everything.

“I needed you—Altan needed you—and all you did was, was—”
Jiang spoke so quietly she almost couldn’t hear him. “I couldn’t save Altan.”
— The Burning God

He did care. Deeply. And the way Altan’s story ended? It broke Jiang’s heart too.

How did you interpret Chaghan claiming he's dying? And what do you think Rin meant with "Then are you —"

Am I extremely slow? Because I'm not sure what she was going to say. Was she going to ask him if he's losing his sanity? Was she going to ask him if he lost his abilities? I feel dumb lol

I just think when Chaghan says he's dying, it doesn't necessarily seem to be something physical. I thought it could because anchors feel each other's pain and Kitay had some motor issues using his right hand after Rin lost hers. So it wouldn't surprise me if an anchor dies, that the one who stays behind will start to die slowly too.

But I don't think it's it. Rin even describes how he's more robust and real. Maybe when he says he's dying he's just referring to the agonizing physical existence he's now experiencing, and the fact that it's more and more tempting and easier to never come back to his body.

And he makes it sound half intentional. For Chaghan his drug is the easiness of the unmaterial plane. The freedom from his bodily heaviness. Not power, like Rin. He surely sounds depressed by his new reality. Not just that. Chaghan took pride in being so great... And without an anchor he's not capable of the same feats anymore. So even that probably makes him feel there's not point to life anymore.

He makes it seem that drifting away will be both a necessity and choice one day. And maybe that's the death he's talking about. A semi suicide.

I don't remember how old Chaghan and Qara were when they were anchored, but I think they were young.

Imagine living most of your life half here, half not. Half real, half spirit. And abruptly all human sensations pulling you down like a heavy weight.

After Rin spends weeks, perhaps months, away from Kitay and the fire, she becomes so grounded that she has difficulty cutting her leg to message Kitay. When she had withstand horrible pains in the past like stabbing and freaking amputation.

It must be so agonizing for Chaghan to suddenly feel everything, body and mind, so intensely. Particularly during a period of grief.

What are normal bodily sensations for anyone, might feel super heightened for him. Pain, hunger, tiredness, everything.

I don't know how they could meet, maybe Enki, being a senior medical student, will start tutoring and become fond of the little first-year girl who isn't even sure if she wants to continue studying medicine.

Enki would help her find her passion and even her area of specialization. Over time, their friendship would intensify until they saw each other as siblings. Enki would be the first person to whom Lianhua would tell that she had a little crush on her friend (Pipaji). In turn, Enki would try with all his might to keep the little girl he had taken under his wing away from the Cike, because he is not Altan; he does not want to corrupt the pure and adorable soul of his girl.